My girlfriend was informed by her gynocologist that she has the human papillomavirus, or HPV. It's impossible to tell who had it first, but I'm most likely a carrier now as well. For those of you who don't know, HPV is a virus that's said to be a prerequisite for cervical cancer in women. Men can carry the virus, but it's nearly harmless for them.

Some HPV facts from wikipedia:
HPV is the most common sexual transmitted infection in the United States. In the United States approximately 20-million people are currently infected with HPV about 6.2 million Americans will get infected with genital HPV this year.

24.5% prevalence of HPV among females 14 to 19 years old
44.8% prevalence of HPV among females 20 to 24 years old
27.4% prevalence of HPV among females 25 to 29 years old
27.5% prevalence of HPV among females 30 to 39 years old
25.2% prevalence of HPV among females 40 to 49 years old
19.6% prevalence of HPV among females 50 to 59 years old

In the absence of Pap testing or treatment, about 1% of women with genital HPV infections will eventually go on to develop cervical cancer.

Women who have Pap testing or other cervical cancer screenings on a regular basis dramatically decrease their chances of developing cervical cancer.

A 2006 study of 82 college students suggests that condoms can be up to 70% effective for preventing genital HPV infection if used for every sexual encounter.

Here's my question. Am I required to disclose this information before having relations with another woman? I have a feeling that everyone's kneejerk reaction will be "yes", but please consider the following. There's a huge chance that the woman already has the virus, and if she doesn't already she'll probably get it in the future*. With a condom, she probably won't get it from me anyway. With pap testing, there's a very very low risk of cancer. And quite frankly, I feel that she won't know all the facts and will think it's a bigger deal than it actually is.

Thoughts?







*Genital HPV infection is very common, with estimates suggesting that more than 50% of women will become infected with one or more of the sexually transmitted HPV types at some point during adulthood.[7]

The American Social Health Association projections in 2006 were yet more pessimistic, predicting that about 75% of the reproductive population will have been infected with genital HPV infection in their lifetime.

Hard-pressed to reveal this information in a new relationship as it might prematurely end it. I was never one to jump in bed on the first date, but you kids nowadays :rolleyes: You're going to have to own up to it eventually ... get it over early and practice safe sex.

Absolutely, Positively, Yes. You could potentially be responsible for a woman getting cervical cancer and dying.

Required? No. Morally and ethically? Absolutely.

Women know the risks of having multiple partners and not being in a monogomas (sp?) relationship, but that doesn't mean they deserve to have information witheld from them.

Let's put it this way, is you getting tail more important than their health, whether or not they *might* get it anyway?

Absolutely, Positively, Yes. You could potentially be responsible for a woman getting cervical cancer and dying.

:iagree: This has been all over the news lately.

Depends on the gas station you are filling up at.

My suggestion is to not cheat on your girlfriend. lol.

Forget the name of the disease/infection, should you (a) disclose this information no matter what you had prior to sealing the deal or (b) wrap up your little buddy and just merrily bang away?

... don't people go to jail for having sex knowing they have HIV without telling their partners? Similar consequences to women ...

My suggestion is to not cheat on your girlfriend. lol.

My thoughts exactly :lol: .. unless she's your *ex* or soon to be and you left that out?

Forget the name of the disease/infection, should you (a) disclose this information no matter what you had prior to sealing the deal or (b) wrap up your little buddy and just merrily bang away?

A condom does not protect 100% against the transmission of the disease. This a potentially deadly STD and it his duty and obligation to inform any and all sexual partners beforehand.

Maybe we need a law!!!
American nannyism at it's best!!

My suggestion is to not cheat on your girlfriend. lol.

By any chance did your girlfriend recently get hired to work for a bank dealing with cash management? ok, sorry, I felt compelled to lighten things ;)

Required? No. Morally and ethically? Absolutely.

Women know the risks of having multiple partners and not being in a monogomas (sp?) relationship, but that doesn't mean they deserve to have information witheld from them.

Let's put it this way, is you getting tail more important than their health, whether or not they *might* get it anyway?

:iagree: If you like them enough to sleep with them you should care enough to tell them ! Now working it into the conversation may be a bit tricky ......... :scratchh:

there are multipl strains of HPV some cause warts some cause cervical cancer...I did a class project on HPV for my human desises class...HPV is spread from skin to skin contact...very transmittible. Most infections will clear them selves up without the patient even knowing they have been infected. Not all strains cause cancer but all cervical cancers are caused by HPV.

here is my project:
(E/T etimology..S/S signs & symptoms...D/X diagnosis...T/X treatment...P/P precaution prevention)

HPV
One of the most common virus groups in the world
Over 100 strains have been identified
30 of which are genital
When the strains are identified they are numbered (HPV-1, HPV-2 etc.)
Each strain is classified as either “Low-Risk” or “High-Risk”
HPV
Different strains affect different parts of the body
The virus infects the epithelial cells and mucosa
HPV can affect any any part of the body
Most common strains produce papillomas, also known as warts
HPV
Condyloma tissue is the medical term for the warts that HPV produces
The warts present as small cauliflower type growths and are generally painless; some may cause irritation, itching or burning
HPV strains that produce warts are classified as “Low-Risk”
GENITAL HPV
Approximately 20 million people are infected with HPV
50% of all sexually active men and women will experience a genital HPV infection at some point in their lives
By the age of 50, 80% of all woman in the US will have acquired a genital HPV
GENITAL HPV
6.2 Million Americans are infected with HPV each year
E/T
Skin to skin contact; rarely an infant can acquire HPV during a vaginal birth if the mother is infected
GENITAL HPV
S/S
Most strains have no visible symptoms
Some strains will cause dysplasia of the cervix, vulva, anus, penis and mouth
HPV-6 & HPV-11 will produce genital warts, known as condyloma acuminatum
GENITAL HPV
These growths present as soft moist flesh colored swellings, and may appear on the vulva, in or around the vagina, cervix, on the penis, scrotum, anus, groin or thigh
It may take weeks or months for papillomas to appear after contact with an infected person

GENITAL HPV
D/X
Appearance of warts along with a history of exposure to an infected individual will often be enough to diagnose
Most cases in woman are diagnosed after an abnormal PAP test, DNA testing can pinpoint the strain involved in the infection
GENITAL HPV
In 2000 the FDA approved the first test specific to HPV
This test, The Hybrid Capture II was only administered after a PAP test came back with abnormal findings
IN 2003 The FDA expanded the use of this test to include screening and it is done in conjunction with regular PAP testing
GENITAL HPV
Hybrid Capture is the only FDA approved method of HPV DNA testing
The ThinPrep Pap Test is the only cervical cancer screening technology approved by the FDA for HPV testing using the same cervical specimens taken from a Pap smear
GENITAL HPV
Further testing with a colposcope may be used to detect any abnormalities such as squamous intraepithelial lesions
It is recommended for woman over 30 to have regular HPV testing
GENITAL HPV
T/X
Currently there is no cure for HPV
Most cases are self-limiting and will clear up with out the person even knowing they were infected
Warts and abnormal cell growths can be removed by hot or cold cautery, laser treatment, or LEEP
GENITAL HPV
Podophillin or Trichloracetic acid may also be used to remove warts
Imiquimod cream is also an effective treatment for external genital or parianal warts; Imiquimod works by stimulating the immune system to fight the virus
Interfuron is also used for resistant infections
GENITAL HPV
P/P
Avoid contact with infected persons
Condoms are NOT an effective prevention of the virus; virus is often in epithelial tissue not covered by the condom
Regular screening for HPV can identify “High-Risk” strains
GENITAL HPV
Vaccines are being developed for for cervical cancer as well as other HPV-related cancers
They focus on developing an immunity to HPV before exposure, as well as tumor suppressors for woman already inflicted with cervical cancer
HPV AND CANCER
95% of all cervical cancers have been linked to HPV
DNA identification of infecting strains is critical
Strains HPV-16 & HPV-18 are the most dangerous strains
Links are now being made between HPV and mouth cancer
HPV AND CANCER
High risk strains are not usually contained in visible warts, therefore persons often don’t know they have an infection
Dysplasia is not cancer but it is a tissue change that is seen before malignancy develops

UMMMMMMMMM.....NO brainer............YES....YES....YES!!!!!

Excellent information lippy_grl1, thank you. It looks like you did some great research.

Absolutely, Positively, Yes. You could potentially be responsible for a woman getting cervical cancer and dying.

:iagree:

there are multipl strains of HPV some cause warts some cause cervical cancer...I did a class project on HPV for my human desises class...HPV is spread from skin to skin contact...very transmittible. Most infections will clear them selves up without the patient even knowing they have been infected. Not all strains cause cancer but all cervical cancers are caused by HPV.

That's an excellent point. Some HPV strains are more harmful than others. I just learned that from reading WIKI, and I plan to ask my gf if she has any paperwork from the gyno that I can review and find out more information. Or even call the gyno myself.

... don't people go to jail for having sex knowing they have HIV without telling their partners? Similar consequences to women ...

are you charactersing one sex as being more likely to have a particular disease? i think both women and men are serious violators... men and women cant be trusted these days.

as to the OPs question...yes you should inform them regardless of the nature and severity of the STD.

OP, if a woman carried a disease that was harmless to her, but potentially fatal to you (let's say she was a carrier of something that could lead to prostate cancer and could sexually transmit it to you - if medically possible), would you want her to tell you?

Put the shoe on the other foot. If it were you and the person you were dating had some kind of STD or contagious disease they could possibly transfer to you, would you want to know? :nod:

That's an excellent point. Some HPV strains are more harmful than others. I just learned that from reading WIKI, and I plan to ask my gf if she has any paperwork from the gyno that I can review and find out more information. Or even call the gyno myself.

So you would be ok with giving certain strains of HPV to women? It's ok for them to get vaginal warts as long as they don't get cancer?

A condom does not protect 100% against the transmission of the disease. This a potentially deadly STD and it his duty and obligation to inform any and all sexual partners beforehand.
I have a feeling that all the people who are screaming "yes yes yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" have no idea if they have the virus, and haven't given a second thought to finding out and informing their partners as much.

Excellent information lippy_grl1, thank you. It looks like you did some great research.


Thanks..I did it in 2005 since then the vaccine has come out, as has awareness of HPV

Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes! This is not a disease to be taken lightly!

Good lord!

Dysplasia is not cancer but it is a tissue change that is seen before malignancy develops ...as Lippy_grl1 has pointed out. And the treatment for that is a partial vaginectomy and chemotherapy cream. I've known someone who went through that.


Don't be selfish out there guys...and women too. Tell your partner, always wear a condom. And if you ever get in a relationship that you think "is the one" make sure they understand the risks before having unprotected sex.

You should not withold this information from her. By doing so you are removing her right to choose for herself if intercourse with you is a risk she wishes to take.

HPV is very serious, and should not be taken lightly.

So you would be ok with giving certain strains of HPV to women? It's ok for them to get vaginal warts as long as they don't get cancer?
I know that it's not the wart variety, because I don't show any symptoms.

Are you married? If not, am I to assume that you inform your partners that you carry the virus if you do? Do you even KNOW if you do?

That's an excellent point. Some HPV strains are more harmful than others. I just learned that from reading WIKI, and I plan to ask my gf if she has any paperwork from the gyno that I can review and find out more information. Or even call the gyno myself.


they may do DNA testing to see what strain she has.

I have a feeling that all the people who are screaming "yes yes yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" have no idea if they have the virus, and haven't given a second thought to finding out and informing their partners as much.

women get paps every year (or they should) and most OB/GYNS now use the Thin-Prep Pap Test which screens for HPV...so they most likely do know. I think the people screaming yes would say the same thing to a woman if she were asking the question.

Bet you a $1 that if the question were phrased differently, that the results of the poll would be very different. ie "If you're at a party, feeling pretty good, just met someone and there's a good chance you'll hook up later ... do you tell them?" Add alcohol/rec stuff to the mix then its really skewed.

women get paps every year (or they should) and most OB/GYNS now use the Thin-Prep Pap Test which screens for HPV...so they most likely do know. I think the people screaming yes would say the same thing to a woman if she were asking the question.

This is one more reason why it is so important to get those yearly's done. :nod:

I know that it's not the wart variety, because I don't show any symptoms.

Are you married? If not, am I to assume that you inform your partners that you carry the virus if you do? Do you even KNOW if you do?

Yes, I'm married and yes, I've been tested. I have more than one friend with HPV and each time they found out, it was devastating. Count yourself lucky that you don't have any symptoms, a male friend, his penis was covered in warts in a very short time. The virus hit him hard. He had to use a cream every day. He found out later that the girl knew beforehand and never told him. Their relationship did not last.

So then, he was alone, with the wart variety of HPV. What do you think his relationship prospects were after that?

Bet you a $1 that if the question were phrased differently, that the results of the poll would be very different. ie "If you're at a party, feeling pretty good, just met someone and there's a good chance you'll hook up later ... do you tell them?" Add alcohol/rec stuff to the mix then its really skewed.

yes if you have an ounce of conscience

I know that it's not the wart variety, because I don't show any symptoms.

Are you married? If not, am I to assume that you inform your partners that you carry the virus if you do? Do you even KNOW if you do?

its besides the point whether kimber has any STD or if she tells her partners....
the point is ... YOU probably have it cos ur gf has it and you dont know who had it first.
so YOU should tell your future partners.
would you? i doubt you will.

Can you imagine telling your wife down the road when she has a problem you new about it but failed to tell her.

women get paps every year (or they should) and most OB/GYNS now use the Thin-Prep Pap Test which screens for HPV...so they most likely do know. I think the people screaming yes would say the same thing to a woman if she were asking the question.

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?

I have a feeling that no one will answer yes to question #2. I have another hunch that no one will answer yes to question #1, either. Even though, statistically, a good number of women and men will be carriers.

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?

I have a feeling that no one will answer yes to question #2. I have another hunch that no one will answer yes to question #1, either. Even though, statistically, a good number of women and men will be carriers.

1.) Yes I do know for certian I do not have the virus.
2.) Yes I have discussed this with my partner.

let me specify if I did have the virus I would discuss it with my partner.

Bet you a $1 that if the question were phrased differently, that the results of the poll would be very different. ie "If you're at a party, feeling pretty good, just met someone and there's a good chance you'll hook up later ... do you tell them?" Add alcohol/rec stuff to the mix then its really skewed.
:iagree: The poll is 11-2 right now. Common sense tells me that the poll numbers don't agree with reality. Not even close.

Goalie...it is not the end of the world. Perhaps you can speak with a health care provider..I am not sure if there is a way for you to be screened, I am sure there is. Ask your GF to make an appointment for the both of you to meet with him/her and discuss the options.

I have a feeling that all the people who are screaming "yes yes yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" have no idea if they have the virus, and haven't given a second thought to finding out and informing their partners as much.

Ummm... Yes, I have it. I found out shortly after I was married as part of a routine pap test. I had to have a colposcopy which is where the doctor snips off a portion of a woman's cervix. NOT PLEASANT.... Thank goodness mine turned out to not be the dangerous kind, but as a result of that experience 7 years ago I am now required to get a pap test every 6 months instead of annually, and my insurance company is a PITA about it every time because I'm allowed only one well-woman screening a year at the OB.

So yeah... I'd tell.

If you're man enough to do the deed shouldn't you be man enough to tell the woman all the facts?? Here's a hint.... don't tell her as you are putting the condom on. This needs to be a daylight over coffee conversation.

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?

I have a feeling that no one will answer yes to question #2. I have another hunch that no one will answer yes to question #1, either. Even though, statistically, a good number of women and men will be carriers.


ok goalie, did you start this thread to discuss other peoples problems or YOUR problem...
who cares who has hpv or any other std....YOU probably have it. get tested and chances are you have HPV...if you do the right thing to do would be to tell future partners.

answers.1) no i dont have hpv, i know for certain.
2) if i did , i would tell them.

:iagree: The poll is 11-2 right now. Common sense tells me that the poll numbers don't agree with reality. Not even close.

:iagree: and I'm betting that most taking the poll are in a relationship...

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?

I have a feeling that no one will answer yes to question #2. I have another hunch that no one will answer yes to question #1, either. Even though, statistically, a good number of women and men will be carriers.

1) Yes, I know with absolute certainty that I do not have HPV. That is what regular gyn/ pap screenings are for. It is about womens health, and I take that seriously, as I am sure all women do.

And yes, both my partner and I have discussed openly everything about our health. That is a part of being in a relationship, being honest with one another. You should both care enough about each other to look out for their health as well as your own.

www.stdfriends.com
www.stdsingles.com

You dont have to tell anyone they will know when you show up for the date.

More then 90% of the population caries type I herpes a very large percentage carry hpv. It probably something you want to discuss. Theres probably a good probability your partner may have something to discuss themselves.

I am just completely disgusted that you are trying to turn this around on us because you don't want to do the right thing.

:iagree: and I'm betting that most taking the poll are in a relationship...

I'll cop to that Rammy. We are pretty open about things though considering the previous circumstances at the beginning of the year. DH and I have also discussed the guardisil <sp?> shots with our two older teenage daughters. We both feel very strongly about this.

I have a feeling that all the people who are screaming "yes yes yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" have no idea if they have the virus, and haven't given a second thought to finding out and informing their partners as much. You think you have a virus that you got from your girl, and now you are trying to find a reason to justify not disclosing this information to a potential girl in hopes of sexual relations???

:vomit:

How about you ask yourself this-- if roles were reversed in the same scenario, how would you feel? (i.e. A girl had a disease that could, although unlikely, cause a man cancer and maybe even die). Would you want this girl lying to you and taking a chance while she justifies to herself why she is knowingly infecting you with a disease that could kill you. "Well, it is such a small percentage that die. Most guys have it but don't even know it, so he probably has it already. It's not really a big deal so he doesn't need to know."

So you would be cool with this? :rolleyes:

I am just completely disgusted that you are trying to turn this around on us because you don't want to do the right thing.

i agree. i think someone is just pissed and somehow expects that there would be some kind of support for what the OP plans to do ... i.e...not inform future partners of his STD status. a very reprehensible act. hope ur weee wee snaps into a million pieces.:lmao: and yes i just laughed at you for having an STD...i normally wouldnt laugh at someone for this., but in this i think its warranted.

I'll cop to that Rammy. We are pretty open about things though considering the previous circumstances at the beginning of the year. DH and I have also discussed the guardisil <sp?> shots with our two older teenage daughters. We both feel very strongly about this.

Our daughter will be getting the Guardisil shot when she is old enough too.

Yes, I'm married and yes, I've been tested. I have more than one friend with HPV and each time they found out, it was devastating.

This highlights the point I was trying to make in the OP. Having the virus should not be devistating. I suspect that your friends didn't know all of the facts.

Remember that with pap screenings, acquiring cancer is "significantly" less than 1%. They're still more likely to develop other types of cancers, such as breast or lung (if they smoke). Further, some studies show that 85% of people will be exposed to HPV in their lifetime.

Riding in a car on the highway is statistically far more dangerous than HPV. Are your friends devistated everytime they find out they have to take a roadtrip?

I am just completely disgusted that you are trying to turn this around on us because you don't want to do the right thing.

Who? TG? I think that's a bit harsh and the guy is being open, give him a break. YES I think he should share this information prior to making the beast with two backs but bashing him over the head isn't going to convince him (is it?)

You think you have a virus that you got from your girl, and now you are trying to find a reason to justify not disclosing this information to a potential girl in hopes of sexual relations???

:vomit:

How about you ask yourself this-- if roles were reversed in the same scenario, how would you feel? (i.e. A girl had a disease that could, although unlikely, cause a man cancer and maybe even die). Would you want this girl lying to you and taking a chance while she justifies to herself why she is knowingly infecting you with a disease that could kill you. "Well, it is such a small percentage that die. Most guys have it but don't even know it, so he probably has it already. It's not really a big deal so he doesn't need to know."

So you would be cool with this? :rolleyes:

this is probably the response the OP will probably give...
hey tmk are u married? and do u have HPV? and if you did , did you tell ur partners? you arent being real...the OPs argument is ridiculous.

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?



1) There is no test for men only women. So question 1 is lopsided.

I gave my wife genital herpes. Although two doctors contradicted themselves in the diagnosis type I vs type 2. If you have ever gotten a cold sore you have type I and can conceivably give that to someone on there genitals.

yes..

Our daughter will be getting the Guardisil shot when she is old enough too.

not to go all OT here but I have been fighting our insurance company over this. They still consider it experamentative and won't cover the three boosters. They are $500.00 each. WTH they won't cover something that can save them millions in the future is beyond me. Do you know if yours will cover it?

Who? TG? I think that's a bit harsh and the guy is being open, give him a break. YES I think he should share this information prior to making the beast with two backs but bashing him over the head isn't going to convince him (is it?)

ok so if i raped someone and was open about it would i get a break? :shake:

I am just completely disgusted that you are trying to turn this around on us because you don't want to do the right thing.
You couldn't be more wrong. What do you think the point of this thread is? To tell the world that I don't plan on saying anything to a partner? I simply wanted to hear different points of view. I never said if plan to disclose the information or not!

YOU'RE the one who's turning me ME. You should thank me for increasing HPV awareness. I'm waiting.

The way I see it, the OP is taking away the woman's right to choose in this matter by willfully witholding potentially life threatening information...

and as you said in an earlier post... something about only one percent being fatal and it not being a big deal.... tell that to the one percent OP......

This highlights the point I was trying to make in the OP. Having the virus should not be devistating. I suspect that your friends didn't know all of the facts.

Remember that with pap screenings, acquiring cancer is "significantly" less than 1%. They're still more likely to develop other types of cancers, such as breast or lung (if they smoke). Further, some studies show that 85% of people will be exposed to HPV in their lifetime.

Riding in a car on the highway is statistically far more dangerous than HPV. Are your friends devistated everytime they find out they have to take a roadtrip?

After I said that, I gave an example of it. Just because it's not devastating to you, doesn't mean it's not to other people.

this is probably the response the OP will probably give...
hey tmk are u married? and do u have HPV? and if you did , did you tell ur partners? you arent being real...the OPs argument is ridiculous.
The OPs argument is that he feels that many people in the YES crowd don't practice what they preach.

I don't see what's ridiculous about that.

You couldn't be more wrong. What do you think the point of this thread is? To tell the world that I don't plan on saying anything to a partner? I simply wanted to hear different points of view. I never said if plan to disclose the information or not!

YOU'RE the one who's turning me ME. You should thank me for increasing HPV awareness. I'm waiting.

Thank you for increasing awareness but to side with Kimber, I believe from OP you may have been looking for an out. ie "its so common, why bother?"

not to go all OT here but I have been fighting our insurance company over this. They still consider it experamentative and won't cover the three boosters. They are $500.00 each. WTH they won't cover something that can save them millions in the future is beyond me. Do you know if yours will cover it?

She's only 17 month old, so I have no idea. Hopefully it will be straightened out by the time she is old enough.

Good luck hun. :hug:

Why would you not tell them? Nothing good can come of not telling them can it? except short term sexual gratification.

Anyone?

She's only 17 month old, so I have no idea. Hopefully it will be straightened out by the time she is old enough.

Good luck hun. :hug:

just spread the word baby...... spread the word :thumbup:

The OPs argument is that he feels that many people in the YES crowd don't practice what they preach.

I don't see what's ridiculous about that.

maybe I missed this but which crowd are you ? The Yes or No crowd?

Thank you for increasing awareness but to side with Kimber, I believe from OP you may have been looking for an out. ie "its so common, why bother?"
I can understand why people would assume that, but they easiest out would be not to post a thread at all. I was simply interested to hear the opinion of others. and maybe learn more about HPV in the process.

I'm not even sure if the virus is permanent! For all I know, it clears up in men. I haven't read anything about that. That's one of the things I wanted to learn. From a reputable source, that is.

The OPs argument is that he feels that many people in the YES crowd don't practice what they preach.

I don't see what's ridiculous about that.
so this thread is about showing how your dissents on this matter in the Lounge are hypocrites?? Funny, I thought it was about lying to a woman to increase your chances in bed.

and you never answered my question.... I guess I should never underestimate the power of denial :rolleyes:

...

How about you ask yourself this-- if roles were reversed in the same scenario, how would you feel? (i.e. A girl had a disease that could, although unlikely, cause a man cancer and maybe even die). Would you want this girl lying to you and taking a chance while she justifies to herself why she is knowingly infecting you with a disease that could kill you. "Well, it is such a small percentage that die. Most guys have it but don't even know it, so he probably has it already. It's not really a big deal so he doesn't need to know."

So you would be cool with this? :rolleyes:

You couldn't be more wrong. What do you think the point of this thread is? To tell the world that I don't plan on saying anything to a partner? I simply wanted to hear different points of view. I never said if plan to disclose the information or not!

YOU'RE the one who's turning me ME. You should thank me for increasing HPV awareness. I'm waiting.

You want people to openly admit here whether they have a FARKING STD! In an internet forum. Haven't you heard story's of people being checked out on the internet by potential employers, schools, etc.?!?!?

I stand by my statement. This could have been a really constructive discussion if you hadn't demanded that people justify their "yes" by disclosing their personal HPV status.

While talking to coworkers once about being afraid to have sex ever again (with all of the diseases out there..and my luck :rolleyes:) some of them said "pfft...everyone has that HPV now..don't worry about it". I was floored. One said her GYN told her to never tell a guy because then she'd never have sex again. :eek:

Let me ask you something the_goalie...how did you feel about your gf when you found that she most likely gave you HPV? I have to assume that since you're already thinking about whether or not you should tell your future partners that this current gf isn't the one. Did you think she was until the discovery rocked your faith in her?

maybe I missed this but which crowd are you ? The Yes or No crowd?I never said. I'm surprised that you're the first person to ask! It only took 70 posts, a good number of them chastising me. In fairness, though, it appears from the OP that I'm probably in the "no" crowd. I'm not. But I'm not 100% in the yes crowd, either.

In in the "I need to find out more information before I'm in the yes or no crowd" crowd.

I never said. I'm surprised that you're the first person to ask! It only took 70 posts, a good number of them chastising me. In fairness, though, it appears from the OP that I'm probably in the "no" crowd. I'm not. But I'm not 100% in the yes crowd, either.

In in the "I need to find out more information before I'm in the yes or no crowd" crowd.

TBF your SO is obviously in the yes crowd. She did right by you I would think the only right thing to do would be to do the same for any future SO's? If she had not told you and somewhere down the road you accidentaly found out how would that make you feel?

You want people to openly admit here whether they have a FARKING STD! In an internet forum. Haven't you heard story's of people being checked out on the internet by potential employers, schools, etc.?!?!?

I stand by my statement. This could have been a really constructive discussion if you hadn't demanded that people justify their "yes" by disclosing their personal HPV status.
You're right, that was wrong. I was just offended at what I percieved to be blatent hypcrisy by some of the yes'ers who I feel probably don't practice what they preach. I find it hard to believe that the poll, for instance, is even close to reality.

fwiw My wife & I have never discussed this nor did I practice the best safe sex in college (I wasn't a slut). The wife & I were mostly aware of the other's partners (but not our partner's partners etc) as we had been good friends for ~10 years.

Not sure where I'm going with this but I've never been diagnosed but if I had I know what a sticky situation it would be if I was on the prowl. I'll probably get bashed for this but I think the earlier suggestion of protecting yourself the best you can and talking about it in daylight conversation is 2nd best to abstinence.

Why would you not tell them? Nothing good can come of not telling them can it? except short term sexual gratification.

Anyone?

Bingo.

Let me ask you something the_goalie...how did you feel about your gf when you found that she most likely gave you HPV? I have to assume that since you're already thinking about whether or not you should tell your future partners that this current gf isn't the one. Did you think she was until the discovery rocked your faith in her?No, not at all. It just got me thinkin' is all.

would definitely let your next partner know. however girls should be getting the available vaccination and then there is nothing to be concerned about.

My girlfriend was informed by her gynocologist that she has the human papillomavirus, or HPV. It's impossible to tell who had it first, but I'm most likely a carrier now as well. For those of you who don't know, HPV is a virus that's said to be a prerequisite for cervical cancer in women. Men can carry the virus, but it's nearly harmless for them.

Here's my question. Am I required to disclose this information before having relations with another woman? I have a feeling that everyone's kneejerk reaction will be "yes", but please consider the following. There's a huge chance that the woman already has the virus, and if she doesn't already she'll probably get it in the future*. With a condom, she probably won't get it from me anyway. With pap testing, there's a very very low risk of cancer. And quite frankly, I feel that she won't know all the facts and will think it's a bigger deal than it actually is.

Thoughts?




OP, I know what you are saying now, but from your op, it looks as if you came here for two reasons.

1) You are very concerned how telling women this beforehand will affect your social life, specifically how much tail you can get.

2) While you aren't necessarily in the "no" crowd as you call it, you don't want to have to tell women this, and were looking for some justification or whatever to sooth your conscience because you know it's wrong not to tell someone.

I know you are saying you aren't in either "crowd" right now, but it's fairly obvious you are trying to see if you can justify not telling someone.

would definitely let your next partner know. however girls should be getting the available vaccination and then there is nothing to be concerned about.

even the vaccination doesn't prevent it 100% hun. Women have to be vigilant about getting those check ups and yearly's. :thumbsup:

would definitely let your next partner know. however girls should be getting the available vaccination and then there is nothing to be concerned about.

The vaccine does not protect against all forms of the disease. I think it only protects agains 4 different kinds, and there are many more than that.

Thegoalie, what if the next girl you're with is a virgin? (You can be hopeful) ;) She's not been with another, was awaiting the man of her dreams (you) to come along and you don't tell her that you have this virus. She is going to find out at some point that she has contracted this virus and the only person she could have gotten it from is you. You will have dashed her belief and faith in the one person she felt would be there for her always. You will go from being the knight she always dreamed of to the worst enemy she's ever had. She will also wonder how this is going to affect future children she may give birth to. Is it right to force this woman to live with the selfish consequences of your actions for the rest of her life?

OP, I know what you are saying now, but from your op, it looks as if you came here for two reasons.

1) You are very concerned how telling women this beforehand will affect your social life, specifically how much tail you can get.

2) While you aren't necessarily in the "no" crowd as you call it, you don't want to have to tell women this, and were looking for some justification or whatever to sooth your conscience because you know it's wrong not to tell someone.

I know you are saying you aren't in either "crowd" right now, but it's fairly obvious you are trying to see if you can justify not telling someone.
Greer, like I said before, I'm not 100% in the yes crowd. Sex is risky! That's the way it is. I didn't make it that way.

The chances that a woman will have sex with me and end up dying from cervical cancer from ME are next to nill. There's a far greater chance that I'll kill a woman by crashing my car on the highway, but everyone still drives, right? Because driving is also a risky behavior, and you accept the risks.

Further, I understand that any woman I'm with might have an STD and may or may not be aware of it. But I'm not hiding under a rock.

That said, I know the difference between right and wrong. I know that the right thing to do is tell*. But I'm far from the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! or you'll go to hell!" crowd.



*Once I find out more information. Specifically, if I even have the virus! We're all assuming it's permanent which might be an incorrect assumption.

your question is ....
Am I required to disclose this information before having relations with another woman?
"Required" as in Required By Law?
or Morally obligated?

I think you mean morally obligated.

Let your conscience be your guide and I do think you have a conscience or you would not have thought twice about this or brought it up.

I think you know what you need to do.

Let's just take cervical cancer out of this for a minute.
Say the next girl you hook up with doesn't have HPV. She's young, with her whole life ahead of her and she wants to get married and have kids some day.
She gets HPV from you. She may have different symptoms than you and may get vaginal warts. She may have the same symptoms as you and not know until she gets a pap.
Eventually she finds out. She has a conscience and tells every potential partner that she has HPV before any intimacy.
How long do you think it will take before she finds a husband and has kids?

Greer, like I said before, I'm not 100% in the yes crowd. Sex is risky! That's the way it is. I didn't make it that way.

The chances that a woman will have sex with me and end up dying from cervical cancer from ME are next to nill. There's a far greater chance that I'll kill a woman by crashing my car on the highway, but everyone still drives, right? Because driving is also a risky behavior, and you accept the risks.

Further, I understand that any woman I'm with might have an STD and may or may not be aware of it. But I'm not hiding under a rock.

That said, I know the difference between right and wrong. I know that the right thing to do is tell. But I'm far from the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! or you'll go to hell!" crowd.

It's not yes or go to hell by any means, it's yes because it's the right thing to do. I'm not saying you are a bad person for trying to figure out if it'd be ok not to tell. It's natural to wonder how this is going to affect your social life.

As far as it being a risky activity anyway. There is no reason someone should knowingly make it more risky for someone else though. I ride a motorcycle, and I know it's risky. Because of that, another driver isn't justified in pouring diesel fuel in an intersection (which is very slick, worse than ice in some cases) just because I'm taking a risk anyway. Is there a chance I'll hit some diesel in a turn anyway? Sure, but it's still wrong for someone to increase my chances of hitting some.

Or, even direclty with driving. Sure it's dangerous, but we also check out the safety features of cars. I got a car with a seatbelt, crumple zones and airbags, inluding side and head. I do that because it reduces my risk. It'd be wrong for a dealer to sell me a car with the airbags removed and not tell me so, therefore making it more dangerous just because I'm taking a risk by driving anyway.

Full disclosure, I haven't been tested, but my wife had the "pre-marriage" exam before we got married, and we both were virgins until we got married. Only since you asked what everyone else's status was.

Let's just take cervical cancer out of this.
Say the next girl you hook up with doesn't have HPV. She's young, with her whole life ahead of her and she wants to get married and have kids some day.
She gets HPV from you. She may have different symptoms than you and may get vaginal warts. She may have the same symptoms as you and not know until she gets a pap.
Eventually she finds out. She has a conscience and tells every potential partner that she has HPV before any intimacy.
How long do you think it will take before she finds a husband and has kids?

The sad thing about all this is that the percentages wouldn't be so high if there wasn't such a stigma about about these diseases. If more people were honest and open about having/and or being exposed to these things the percentages would be much lower IMHO.

Greer, like I said before, I'm not 100% in the yes crowd. Sex is risky! That's the way it is. I didn't make it that way..

Sex is risky... but by choosing to not disclose your possible status to any prospective intimate partners, you aren't making the problem any better....



The chances that a woman will have sex with me and end up dying from cervical cancer from ME are next to nill. There's a far greater chance that I'll kill a woman by crashing my car on the highway, but everyone still drives, right? Because driving is also a risky behavior, and you accept the risks. ..

So, because you think one percent is an acceptable risk for you that you shouldn't feel bad about transmitting an STD because it statistically doesn't have a high mortality rate??????

That is absolutely absurd....

remember... that one percent is a HUGE number to the person in that one percent catagory.....



Further, I understand that any woman I'm with might have an STD and may or may not be aware of it. But I'm not hiding under a rock.

That said, I know the difference between right and wrong. I know that the right thing to do is tell*. But I'm far from the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! or you'll go to hell!" crowd...

If you know the difference between right and wrong than I think the answer for this situation should be an easy one to make....



*Once I find out more information. Specifically, if I even have the virus! We're all assuming it's permanent which might be an incorrect assumption.

Yes, I would agree with you that you need to speak to a physician and discuss the situation thoroughly.

The sad thing about all this is that the percentages wouldn't be so high if there wasn't such a stigma about about these diseases. If more people were honest and open about having/and or being exposed to these things the percentages would be much lower IMHO.

I agree. If everyone that had it, KNEW they had it..there would much less of a stigma. :nod:

thegoalie.. how about you just discose you have been with to other men.

thus you get yours, and we can CMA ourselves from contracting what you have passed by not sleeping with where you have been.

/dry humor

um, for me- I'd wanna know hon...

I get tested everytime I go see the doc. I have other tests done every 6 months (had an unsafe few years with a guy...)- I would absolutely wanna know if there were ANY greater risks with anyone I was with. But, now- you wouldn't be sleeping with girls like me without getting to those discussions anyway- so, might be a non-issue.

I could get all uptight about values and such- but, truth is, I made it through the dating scene with 'one on the side' for cold nites myself- so, please don't think me jumping high & mighty. I used to joke that my longest standing relationship was a late nite call (so to speak). :lmao:

I just wonder HOW so many can sleep with so many more & nobody is worried to death over it???

Everyone, thanks for the discussion. I must leave now and get some work done, but feel free to discuss among yourselves. I'll give you a topic. Human papillomavirus is neither a human nor a human papillomavirus. Discuss.

Seriously, thanks again. Like I said in the thread, there's still a lot more I need to know. Specifically if the virus is permanent in males and if my GF's pap showed one of the harmful types or one of the more benign types (there are 30 or so types and a few are more harmful than others).

I just wonder HOW so many can sleep with so many more & nobody is worried to death over it???I often wonder how smokers can light up several times a day and not give a second thought to their lungs (or wallet... smoking is expensive!).

My girlfriend was informed by her gynocologist that she has the human papillomavirus, or HPV. It's impossible to tell who had it first, but I'm most likely a carrier now as well. For those of you who don't know, HPV is a virus that's said to be a prerequisite for cervical cancer in women. Men can carry the virus, but it's nearly harmless for them.

Some HPV facts from wikipedia:

Here's my question. Am I required to disclose this information before having relations with another woman? I have a feeling that everyone's kneejerk reaction will be "yes", but please consider the following. There's a huge chance that the woman already has the virus, and if she doesn't already she'll probably get it in the future*. With a condom, she probably won't get it from me anyway. With pap testing, there's a very very low risk of cancer. And quite frankly, I feel that she won't know all the facts and will think it's a bigger deal than it actually is.

Thoughts?







*Genital HPV infection is very common, with estimates suggesting that more than 50% of women will become infected with one or more of the sexually transmitted HPV types at some point during adulthood.[7]

The American Social Health Association projections in 2006 were yet more pessimistic, predicting that about 75% of the reproductive population will have been infected with genital HPV infection in their lifetime.

I'll make a confession here - I have HPV.

Now with HPV, there are only a few types that actually cause cervical cancer. Unfortunately, I have one of those types. But in reality, if your girlfriend doesn't have that type (don't know if her doctor told her or not) then you shouldn't have much to worry about, because almost everyone has HPV.

That being said... I wouldn't worry about it unless she has the type that causes cervical cancer. Other than that, if you happen to be with anyone else, I would mention it in casual conversation after you've been dating for awhile. Chances are, she already has HPV and it will be no big deal- unless, of course, it's the type that causes cervical cancer.

If she freaks out about it, she (the new girlfriend) is probably too dumb for you to be dating anyways. ;)

If a girl gets the precancerous cells, it's a simple outpatient procedure that will freeze the cells off (it's called cryosurgery). I had the procedure and even though it was a bit painful for me and definitely inconvenient for about two weeks while I was healing, but it was worth it because we caught it before it ever even developed. Still, I am getting paps every 3 months now until everything comes back normally.

I have a great gyno... my other gyno just ignored it when he saw the precancerous cells, saying that they may go away by themselves, but this one said that we'd take em off right away so that way we don't even have a chance of getting cancer.

If you have any more questions, feel free to PM me.

I'll make a confession here - I have HPV.

Now with HPV, there are only a few types that actually cause cervical cancer. Unfortunately, I have one of those types. But in reality, if your girlfriend doesn't have that type (don't know if her doctor told her or not) then you shouldn't have much to worry about, because almost everyone has HPV.

That being said... I wouldn't worry about it unless she has the type that causes cervical cancer. Other than that, if you happen to be with anyone else, I would mention it in casual conversation after you've been dating for awhile. Chances are, she already has HPV and it will be no big deal- unless, of course, it's the type that causes cervical cancer.

If she freaks out about it, she (the new girlfriend) is probably too dumb for you to be dating anyways. ;)

If a girl gets the precancerous cells, it's a simple outpatient procedure that will freeze the cells off (it's called cryosurgery). I had the procedure and even though it was a bit painful for me and definitely inconvenient for about two weeks while I was healing, but it was worth it because we caught it before it ever even developed. Still, I am getting paps every 3 months now until everything comes back normally.

I have a great gyno... my other gyno just ignored it when he saw the precancerous cells, saying that they may go away by themselves, but this one said that we'd take em off right away so that way we don't even have a chance of getting cancer.

If you have any more questions, feel free to PM me.

thanks for being so open and informative on the topic PG.. you are not one to share many in depth details of your life from what I have seen on the forum, and may have been difficult for you to share... :comfort:

I don't think there's an easy answer, nor do I think there is one answer for everyone in every situation.

If you are dating someone for a while before taking that big step, I'm pretty sure your conscience will dictate what you do.

In the case of a one nighter ... all bets are pretty much off anyway, because you yourself are rolling the dice, condom or not. Are you 100% sure that the other party is revealing everything? Hell, like you said they prolly don't even know ... still, if you're going to feel guilty, is it worth it? If you're not the type that has a problem with guilt, no one on a message board is going to get you to change your mind anyway (not speaking of anyone personally)

Most answers would lie somewhere in between (no pun intended)

As far as thegoalie is concerned, I'd still hit dat sh!t fo-sho! :thumbup: ;)

Two terrible assumptions in this thread: (1) that its the guy (granted OP) that is always the carrier and potentially withholding information and (2) the current 18-2 vote is even remotely close to accurate for folks seeking new partners.

Two terrible assumptions in this thread: (1) that its the guy (granted OP) that is always the carrier and potentially withholding information and (2) the current 18-2 vote is even remotely close to accurate for folks seeking new partners.

I don't totally understand what you're saying Rammy, can you clarify a bit?

Two terrible assumptions in this thread: (1) that its the guy (granted OP) that is always the carrier and potentially withholding information and (2) the current 18-2 vote is even remotely close to accurate for folks seeking new partners.
:iagree:
the best poll would be the choice of

disclose - searching for partner
disclose - in relationship/marriage
do not disclose - searching for partner
do not disclose - in relationship/marriage

I don't totally understand what you're saying Rammy, can you clarify a bit?

We're all bashing guys for thinking about not telling potential partners that they are carriers when (a) it may be the woman that is the carrier (as OP pointed out 44.8%), and (b) both individuals are personally accountable for their actions. If some chick (or guy) picks up a disease from someone else THEY have no one to blame but themselves if they didn't ask "do you have anything communicable".

Also ... 19-2 is a farking joke imho (but may be representative of the folks responding within this thread in the Lounge). I'm one of the ones that put down "No" btw - not along the lines of how I feel personally, but more along the lines of what I felt the general opinions would be. I'm just thinking back to my much more foolish days when I was trying to get laid like every other red-blooded male ... and I grew up in the Nancy Reagan "Just say no" era when high school girls weren't giving up a thing (my how things have changed) so I can't even speak of carnal knowledge until college.

We're all bashing guys for thinking about not telling potential partners that they are carriers when (a) it may be the woman that is the carrier (as OP pointed out 44.8%), and (b) both individuals are personally accountable for their actions. If some chick (or guy) picks up a disease from someone else THEY have no one to blame but themselves if they didn't ask "do you have anything communicable".

Also ... 19-2 is a farking joke imho (but may be representative of the folks responding within this thread in the Lounge). I'm one of the ones that put down "No" btw - not along the lines of how I feel personally, but more along the lines of what I felt the general opinions would be. I'm just thinking back to my much more foolish days when I was trying to get laid like every other red-blooded male ... and I grew up in the Nancy Reagan "Just say no" era when high school girls weren't giving up a thing (my how things have changed) so I can't even speak of carnal knowledge until college.

I don't recall personally bashing men in particular, in fact, in one of my posts, I discussed a male friend of mine that was infected by a female. I don't really think anyone else was either, I think it was more directed at TG and his potential actions.

I can't say if the poll is an accurate representation of what people would actually do or not. At least it shows that people's hearts are in the right place. I hope that if someone actually finds themselves in that situation, they would think of this discussion and do the right thing.

thanks for being so open and informative on the topic PG.. you are not one to share many in depth details of your life from what I have seen on the forum, and may have been difficult for you to share... :comfort:

No prob. :) I figured my experience would come to some use...

I think people think of HPV wrongly... honestly, yes, it is something that is transmitted sexually, but it's so common! It's not like someone has HIV or anything. As far as we know, if it doesn't progress to cervical cancer, it's not fatal.

And most forms of HPV are completely dormant- it doesn't do anything.

From what I understand, only one type causes external physical symptoms (genital warts) which is very rare... and then there are several types (13, I think) that causes cancer.

People who get HPV rarely have done anything wrong... a lot of times they aren't promiscuous or anything like that. It's just the norm, unfortunately.

And trust me, I've been a good girl my whole life ;) , so if I have the type that causes cancer, I know that it's waaaaaaaaaaaaaay more common than people think.

I don't recall personally bashing men in particular, in fact, in one of my posts, I discussed a male friend of mine that was infected by a female. I don't really think anyone else was either, I think it was more directed at TG and his potential actions.

I didn't mean to imply "you" Kimber and I included myself in the group by saying "we" as a generalization.

I can't say if the poll is an accurate representation of what people would actually do or not. At least it shows that people's hearts are in the right place. I hope that if someone actually finds themselves in that situation, they would think of this discussion and do the right thing.

I totally agree and I would only hope this would hope this would be representative of the rest of the happily humping populace.

All I can say is wow. I am not judging anyone for their opinions, but it seems very clear that not many people here have had to personally go through the damaging effects of HPV.

I too will admit that I was recently diagnosed with HPV. I went to my GYN for my annual visit, everything looked fine, and the results came back SEVERE precancerous. The doctor thought their had to be some kind of mistake because I have been going to him for years and everything had come back completely normal. I had not changed partners, or engaged in any kind of promiscuous behavior. However, upon further testing we found out the diagnosis was correct, and that the cells had spread significantly, but had not penetrated the surface of the tissues so it was still considered to be precancerous instead of cancerous. I had to have several procedures done to remove these cells, and I had to have a cone biopsy to remove part of my cervix and endocervical canal.

Now, the question came to light of how did I get this, and how did it get so out of control when I get tested every year. The doctor said he has no idea. Assuming that my fiance and I had both been faithful (I know I was, and I trust that he was), that could only mean that one of us had carried the HPV strain for several years (which is very possible) and for some reason it became active. We have no idea who had it first, but have to assume that we both have it now. The doctor said that my body would eventually build up an immunity to the strain that I have, but due to the severity of it I have to have paps done every 3 months for the next 2 years, and then every 6 months for the rest of my life.

I am still pretty young, getting ready to get married, and because of what is going on I do not know if I will ever be able to have kids (my cervix may not hold a pregnancy). So, if you ask me if you should be honest with any new partner I would say definitely yes. Are you required to, I dont really know. All I can say is people are learning more and more about this disease, and most people who have it dont even know they have it. Since you know, you have the responsibility of letting any future partner know - otherwise your one night stand or potential relationship could completely ruin their entire life. For me, if mine had not been caught when it was, my diagnosis would certainly have been cancer.

I realize that this would not be an easy conversation to have, but consider the alternatives. Would you want to have sex with someone that you THINK is just a fling, only to really fall for that person and end up married to them (that happened to one of my best friends). Then say 3 years down the road she is diagnosed with cancer from something YOU could have prevented. You dont want to have to live with that for the rest of your life. Like I said, it will be hard to talk about, but it would be better to have that conversation now, than to deal with the consequences later. I know I would be absolutely furious if I found out that my fiance knew he was a carrier and didnt tell me - our relationship probably wouldnt have survived that.

Also, someone had mentioned that the vaccine was really expensive - it is $150 a dose X 3 doses at my doctors office. I am currently getting this - although it cant help me with the strain I already have, it can help protect me against the 3 other really dangerous ones. Many insurances have started covering this 100% under their preventative coverage (mine does), so you may want to check to see if you and/or your kids are covered.

No prob. :) I figured my experience would come to some use...

I think people think of HPV wrongly... honestly, yes, it is something that is transmitted sexually, but it's so common! It's not like someone has HIV or anything. As far as we know, if it doesn't progress to cervical cancer, it's not fatal.

And most forms of HPV are completely dormant- it doesn't do anything.

From what I understand, only one type causes external physical symptoms (genital warts) which is very rare... and then there are several types (13, I think) that causes cancer.

People who get HPV rarely have done anything wrong... a lot of times they aren't promiscuous or anything like that. It's just the norm, unfortunately.

And trust me, I've been a good girl my whole life ;) , so if I have the type that causes cancer, I know that it's waaaaaaaaaaaaaay more common than people think.

I completely agree with what you are saying. It is much more common than people think. I never engaged in behaviors that would have made me high risk for getting this, yet I got it.

The biggest problem with this is that because many times it remains dormant, most people dont even know they are carrying it and/or infecting others. Then when, for no apparent reason, the virus goes from dormant to active, it causes all kinds of damage.

I didn't mean to imply "you" Kimber and I included myself in the group by saying "we" as a generalization.



I totally agree and I would only hope this would hope this would be representative of the rest of the happily humping populace.

I know Rammy, I wasn't taking it personally, I just wanted to point out the fact that it wasn't just about male responsibility in this issue.

And you said "happily humping" hehehe. :coverlaf:

Also, someone had mentioned that the vaccine was really expensive - it is $150 a dose X 3 doses at my doctors office. I am currently getting this - although it cant help me with the strain I already have, it can help protect me against the 3 other really dangerous ones. Many insurances have started covering this 100% under their preventative coverage (mine does), so you may want to check to see if you and/or your kids are covered.
Thanks for the info.

:huh: ... so then if someone WAS informed, is it possible to get this vaccine and then proceed with the sexy time?

Thanks for the info.

:huh: ... so then if someone WAS informed, is it possible to get this vaccine and then proceed with the sexy time?

It only works against certain strains of the disease and only if you don't have them before the vaccination.

I know Rammy, I wasn't taking it personally, I just wanted to point out the fact that it wasn't just about male responsibility in this issue.

And you said "happily humping" hehehe. :coverlaf:

Figured you get a "rise" from that :evillaf: ... and lets be honest Kimber, back in college you spent more time on your back than in the kitchen :bigeye:









:hide:

Figured you get a "rise" from that :evillaf: ... and lets be honest Kimber, back in college you spent more time on your back than in the kitchen :bigeye:

:hide:


Filling in for Tigerstar, are we? :lol:

And to answer your question, yes I slept quite a bit while in college...beer bongs can be SO tiring. :yawn:

:lol: love ya babe :hug:

And to answer your question, yes I slept quite a bit while in college...beer bongs can be SO tiring. :yawn:

:shocking: ... so you really were asleep? No wonder you don't remember me :blush:

roofies FTW! :yahoo:

:shocking: ... so you really were asleep? No wonder you don't remember me :blush:

roofies FTW! :yahoo:

:lol: This discussion has taken that inevitable turn for the "worse" ...hey, we gave it 100 solid posts before jacking it. I believe that is the requisite time for serious discussion threads.

btw Kimber ... who'd a thunk you were good at developing the proper technique to open your throat to swallow beer bongs ... :evillaf:

:shocking: ... so you really were asleep? No wonder you don't remember me :blush:

roofies FTW! :yahoo:

Now that you mention it...I have this hazy memory of a guy with his pants down...OMG..that was you?!? :eek:

:lol: This discussion has taken that inevitable turn for the "worse" ...hey, we gave it 100 solid posts before jacking it. I believe that is the requisite time for serious discussion threads.

btw Kimber ... who'd a thunk you were good at developing the proper technique to open your throat to swallow beer bongs ... :evillaf:

Practice makes perfect...just ask Timber. :wink5:

No prob. :) I figured my experience would come to some use...

I think people think of HPV wrongly... honestly, yes, it is something that is transmitted sexually, but it's so common! It's not like someone has HIV or anything. As far as we know, if it doesn't progress to cervical cancer, it's not fatal.

And most forms of HPV are completely dormant- it doesn't do anything.

From what I understand, only one type causes external physical symptoms (genital warts) which is very rare... and then there are several types (13, I think) that causes cancer.

People who get HPV rarely have done anything wrong... a lot of times they aren't promiscuous or anything like that. It's just the norm, unfortunately.

And trust me, I've been a good girl my whole life ;) , so if I have the type that causes cancer, I know that it's waaaaaaaaaaaaaay more common than people think.

here you are making the assumption that just cos 1. HPV is common, 2. the chances that its fatal are slim ( but still exist), 3. rarely leads to genital warts, 4.they still MIGHT be able to have kids...its ok to not disclose it.....that is just the most stupid argument for a case i could imagine....given the choice that you could have avoided contracting it (regardless of how you contracted it)....would you have said ...oh geee...its so common place, gimme a double dose of HPV...or would you have said u know what i choose not to get it.....now that you have it and had it treated you are in the position where you can ONLY deal with it...you cant make it go away. all you are doing and all ur "experience" has taught you is how to cope with it.....hell if its so harmless., why not give every one a dose and make the playing field even....it all comes down to choice...you and i and anyone else only have the right to choose whats goes into OUR bodies....we dont have the right to choose what goes into someone elses.

here you are making the assumption that just cos 1. HPV is common, 2. the chances that its fatal are slim ( but still exist), 3. rarely leads to genital warts...its ok to not disclose it.....that is just the most stupid argument for a case i could imagine....given the choice that you could have avoided contracting it (regardless of how you contracted it)....would you have said ...oh geee...its so common place, gimme a double dose of HPV...or would you have said u know what i choose not to get it.....now that you have it and had it treated you are in the position where you can ONLY deal with it...you cant make it go away. all you are doing and all ur "experience" has taught you is how to cope with it.....hell if its so harmless., why not give every one a dose and make the playing field even....it all comes down to choice...you and i and anyone else only have the right to choose whats goes into OUR bodies....we dont have the right to choose what goes into someone elses.

:rolleyes:

That's not what I said.

I said that more than likely she has it anyways.

Should people get the vaccine? Yes. But if one takes the necessary precautions once they know they have HPV, they will be ok. It's not a huge deal... it's not like HIV or herpes or anything - it is treatable! Most people don't have side effects- you have to admit that! And when they do, if they are getting their paps regularly like they should be then it is easily taken care of.

Besides, how would you know anyways? I'm the one who has more experience with this than you when it comes to this issue. I went through the cryosurgery. I went through the pain. And if I came out on the other side then I think most people should be able to. :rolleyes:

Anyways, for your information, I voted that he should tell her.

Get your facts straight.

BTW OP, there is no treatment or cure for HPV.

Also, if I was dating someone that knew and they didn't tell me......I would be all kinds of pissed off. (I've been tested and know I don't have it).

BTW OP, there is no treatment or cure for HPV.

Also, if I was dating someone that knew and they didn't tell me......I would be all kinds of pissed off. (I've been tested and know I don't have it).

There is treatment. It is treatable, but not curable.

If there was no treatment, GirlRacer and I would have full-blown cervical cancer by now.

See, even AIDS and herpes are treatable... but the problem with those are that with AIDS, you will die. With herpes, you will have painful side effects.

With HPV, there are so many types out there that have no symptoms. You can live a normal life, have children, whatever! If you have the type where it gives you genital warts, that is treatable... if you have the type where it would give you cervical cancer, that is treatable. But most people will have no side effects.

yes yes

let me ask you ladies

if say, you maybe on #rd date and ready to have sex, if a guy tells u he has it (and you still like it) would you still have sex with him (not mentioning condom since it's mandatory), or wait til you read up on or, or just drop him...

Morally and responsibly, you need to disclose TG.

It won't end your sex life; but it will make you more aware of what you are doing, that is for sure; time to grow up and face the music here; you are responsible not only for yourself; but you are just as responsible to let your sexual partners know that you have this as well; it's the right thing to do!

let me ask you ladies

if say, you maybe on #rd date and ready to have sex, if a guy tells u he has it (and you still like it) would you still have sex with him (not mentioning condom since it's mandatory), or wait til you read up on or, or just drop him...

I would make sure that he has the kind that is not related to the symptomatic types of HPV.

I wonder, is there a way to check in guys to see what strain it is?

Although, if I would've been making this decision before I got my precancerous I probably would have said no. But now that I'm educated about it and I know what the risks are, I would just make sure there was no serious risk involved if I were to sleep with this guy. Because for all I know, if I haven't been tested or experienced any side effects, I could have HPV as well!

I think he should only be responsible to disclose it if he is going to have unprotected sex with her. It's kind of like having herpes (the mouth sore herpes). People will react more seriously than it really is if you tell them you are a carrier.

Isn't HPV untestable unless you're having a breakout at that time? Just curious since there's so many claiming "I'm 10000% positive I don't have it"

:lol: love ya babe :hug:

:crying: I :heart: you guys :grouphug:

The chances that a woman will have sex with me and end up dying from cervical cancer from ME are next to nill. There's a far greater chance that I'll kill a woman by crashing my car on the highway, but everyone still drives, right? Because driving is also a risky behavior, and you accept the risks.

With driving you know there is a risk and you're glad you know it. But it's different. Everyone accepts that before they get on the road. With an STD there is an increased risk--maybe not a very significant one--but it's still there. If you don't tell someone about it they do not know the risk is there. It's different from the driving where you know the risks before you drive.

And I know you're thinking all sex is risky and people know that before engaging in sexual activity, but to not know about increased risks is different.

Following your example with driving... you know it is risky and you accept that risk, but you would still want to know if for some reason your car had an increased risk of losing control on a wet or icy road, wouldn't you? It's different from the overall risk that you accept.

Isn't HPV untestable unless you're having a breakout at that time? Just curious since there's so many claiming "I'm 10000% positive I don't have it"

abnormal paps can be the first sign of a problem, women should have these done yearly therefore should be able to determine if they have or not

I think he should only be responsible to disclose it if he is going to have unprotected sex with her. It's kind of like having herpes (the mouth sore herpes). People will react more seriously than it really is if you tell them you are a carrier.

You can still transmit HPV even if you are wearing a condom.

:rolleyes:

That's not what I said.

I said that more than likely she has it anyways.

Should people get the vaccine? Yes. But if one takes the necessary precautions once they know they have HPV, they will be ok. It's not a huge deal... it's not like HIV or herpes or anything - it is treatable! Most people don't have side effects- you have to admit that! And when they do, if they are getting their paps regularly like they should be then it is easily taken care of.

Besides, how would you know anyways? I'm the one who has more experience with this than you when it comes to this issue. I went through the cryosurgery. I went through the pain. And if I came out on the other side then I think most people should be able to. :rolleyes:

Anyways, for your information, I voted that he should tell her.

Get your facts straight.

ok now ur assumption is most girls probably have it already....but does that matter? if the other person has it, then it wont be a problem and they can go to bunny heaven.

and true i dont know and i am glad i dont know what the experience is like...i am sure there are a lot of people who went through a lot of bad things and came out the other side, dosent mean its ok. lot of people come out of spousal abuse doing quite well...a lot of people go through rapes and "come out on the other side"...for that matter how about breast cancer, divorces....everything is survivable.

to say that oh i went through it and it was alright...so people shouldnt make a big deal about it is a little hard to fathom. how do you even come up with this argument?:lmao:

in other matters...hows ur preparations to vegas going...dont forget sunscreen...my friends sister got back from vegas and she said it was HOT.

You can still transmit HPV even if you are wearing a condom.

How's that? How is it transmitted? Skin contact? Semen? Blood? Saliva?

How's that? How is it transmitted? Skin contact? Semen? Blood? Saliva?

Skin to skin

I would make sure that he has the kind that is not related to the symptomatic types of HPV.

I wonder, is there a way to check in guys to see what strain it is?

Although, if I would've been making this decision before I got my precancerous I probably would have said no. But now that I'm educated about it and I know what the risks are, I would just make sure there was no serious risk involved if I were to sleep with this guy. Because for all I know, if I haven't been tested or experienced any side effects, I could have HPV as well!

maybe the best i think is this: get tested(both) for the whole STD line and then share results...

Oh, and FYI, I honestly believe that abstinence before marriage is the right thing to do anyways... which would eliminate most chances if one were to actually follow it.

There is treatment. It is treatable, but not curable.

If there was no treatment, GirlRacer and I would have full-blown cervical cancer by now.

See, even AIDS and herpes are treatable... but the problem with those are that with AIDS, you will die. With herpes, you will have painful side effects.

With HPV, there are so many types out there that have no symptoms. You can live a normal life, have children, whatever! If you have the type where it gives you genital warts, that is treatable... if you have the type where it would give you cervical cancer, that is treatable. But most people will have no side effects.

You can treat the SYMPTOMS, not the disease.

There is no treatment or cure for HPV. But there are ways to treat the health conditions associated with HPV in men, including genital warts, penile cancer and anal cancer.

Visible genital warts can be treated with medication, surgically removed, or frozen off. Some of these treatments can be applied by the patient, while others must be performed by a health care provider. No one treatment is best. Warts might return, especially in the first 3 months after treatment.

It is not known whether treatment of genital warts will reduce the chance of passing the virus on to a sex partner. If left untreated, genital warts may go away, remain unchanged, or increase in size or number. They will not turn into cancer. For these reasons, some individuals may choose not to get treated, but to see if the warts will disappear on their own. This is from the CDC http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/STDFact-HPV-and-men.htm

maybe the best i think is this: get tested(both) for the whole STD line and then share results...

Perfect idea! :clap:

You can treat the SYMPTOMS, not the disease.

This is from the CDC http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/STDFact-HPV-and-men.htm

I was under the assumption that you were speaking of treatment in general. My apologies.

maybe the best i think is this: get tested(both) for the whole STD line and then share results...

a lil OT - the last pregnancy I had they asked if I wanted HIV/STD testing. I was a lil put back because with all my other pregnancies I had not been asked this. The nurse explained to me they are required by law to ask this now. I am not sure if this is just new to PA or everwhere but I found it interesting and thought I'd share.

Perfect idea! :clap:



I was under the assumption that you were speaking of treatment in general. My apologies.

no problem :woot2:

I would make sure that he has the kind that is not related to the symptomatic types of HPV.
yea whip out the "medical journal to go" and i am sure its pg.64 under section "yes i am that horny" of the manual for stds that ALL women carry in their purses...that must be why it weighs so much.:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
p.s. no personal reference of any kind..just a funny.

Oh, and FYI, I honestly believe that abstinence before marriage is the right thing to do anyways... which would eliminate most chances if one were to actually follow it.

I don't necessarily believe in waiting until marriage. But, definitely waiting until commitment. Either way, neither of those exist these days....sadly.

a lil OT - the last pregnancy I had they asked if I wanted HIV/STD testing. I was a lil put back because with all my other pregnancies I had not been asked this. The nurse explained to me they are required by law to ask this now. I am not sure if this is just new to PA or everwhere but I found it interesting and thought I'd share.

Happened to me too, in March of 05, I'm in MA.

maybe the best i think is this: get tested(both) for the whole STD line and then share results...
yea they should make a dating pre sex checklist. check of the boxes and if it goes above a certain score...you are $hit outta luck. :lol:

a lil OT - the last pregnancy I had they asked if I wanted HIV/STD testing. I was a lil put back because with all my other pregnancies I had not been asked this. The nurse explained to me they are required by law to ask this now. I am not sure if this is just new to PA or everwhere but I found it interesting and thought I'd share.

Happened to me in 04 in VT. I think it is standard procedure now....

This highlights the point I was trying to make in the OP. Having the virus should not be devistating. I suspect that your friends didn't know all of the facts.

Remember that with pap screenings, acquiring cancer is "significantly" less than 1%. They're still more likely to develop other types of cancers, such as breast or lung (if they smoke). Further, some studies show that 85% of people will be exposed to HPV in their lifetime.

Riding in a car on the highway is statistically far more dangerous than HPV. Are your friends devistated everytime they find out they have to take a roadtrip?

First of all, let me say that about 2 years ago when I had a routine pap, it came back showing cervical dysplasia, with precancerous cells. More than likely, this was caused by a strain of HPV. I had to have the biopsy, colposcopy, and cryosurgery that PG spoke of. Now that you have those facts, I'll give my opinion:

You say that with pap screenings, it's highly unlikely for anyone to develop cancer. Do you realize though, that means that if a form of HPV is found and it's thought that it could develop into cancer, that it requires *treatment* (usually invasive, at that), in order for it not to develop into cancer? So just because you might give it to someone, and as long as they go for their pap to be checked, doesn't mean that they won't have problems, even though it may not be cancer. Who wants to think, "Well, who cares what I have to go through to prevent the cancer from coming as long as it doesn't?" Yes, cancer is the worst case scenario, but it doesn't make the other alternatives any more pleasant. Many treatments can become painful, costly, and time-consuming.



Greer, like I said before, I'm not 100% in the yes crowd. Sex is risky! That's the way it is. I didn't make it that way.

The chances that a woman will have sex with me and end up dying from cervical cancer from ME are next to nill. There's a far greater chance that I'll kill a woman by crashing my car on the highway, but everyone still drives, right? Because driving is also a risky behavior, and you accept the risks.

Further, I understand that any woman I'm with might have an STD and may or may not be aware of it. But I'm not hiding under a rock.

That said, I know the difference between right and wrong. I know that the right thing to do is tell*. But I'm far from the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! or you'll go to hell!" crowd.


*Once I find out more information. Specifically, if I even have the virus! We're all assuming it's permanent which might be an incorrect assumption.

As I mentioned, she may not ultimately *die* from having sex with you, but chances are, given the choice, a woman would probably like to know about the chances of her developing any type, strain, or form of disease at all. Just because some strains don't cause cancer doesn't mean a woman won't mind contracting it. Who's to say that those strains don't cause problems that aren't known about yet?

To sum it up, I think almost everyone woman would want to know that there's a chance they could contract a disease, no matter how fatal it could be. And now that you know there's the chance you could give something to a woman, it's your responsibility to let her know and make her own decisions.

Happened to me too, in March of 05, I'm in MA.

Cayden was born in 04 and I wasn't asked then. I have a feeling this is more preventative but with the new privacy laws even if people do get tested who knows if they will tell their SO's or not. It seems like a catch 22.

yea whip out the "medical journal to go" and i am sure its pg.64 under section "yes i am that horny" of the manual for stds that ALL women carry in their purses...that must be why it weighs so much.:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
p.s. no personal reference of any kind..just a funny.

That's why people should seriously consider what they are doing when they want to have sex with someone.

You make rash decisions and you get yourself into trouble - if not with an STD, then in some other way.

That's why people should seriously consider what they are doing when they want to have sex with someone.

You make rash decisions and you get yourself into trouble - if not with an STD, then in some other way.

i agree that people should consider what they are doing when they want to have sex with someone, choices like do i PIITB or do i not PIITB are hard to make....could get you into a whole lotta $hit....literally.:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

That's why people should seriously consider what they are doing when they want to have sex with someone.

You make rash decisions and you get yourself into trouble - if not with an STD, then in some other way.

:iagree:

There is also that cancer you can get that only lasts nine month, but changes your life forever.

Someone should invent a test you can carry around with you so you can literally test the person before you get your freak on :thumbup:

Do I have a strain of HPV that may someday give me cancer? Yep. Would I tell my next partner? Yes, but I don't ever intend to have another, and my fiance didn't know he had it. You do. The question is are you willing to do the right thing, knowing what you are exposing your partner to.

There is a chance the girl would already have it, but yes, you should disclose this information. If you don't, you will very likely pass it on to her. What happens then?

Within the next year or two she'll have an abnormal pap. Once the infection shows up on her next pap smear the girl will have to get a colposcopy to determine what kind it is. A colposcopy is where they biopsy the cervix - yes, they cut out several small chunks of her cervix for testing. This does not feel pleasant, like pinching at your bellybutton from the inside.

After running tests they may have to have her come back for a leep procedure.
"LEEP uses a thin wire loop electrode which is attached to an electrosurgical generator. The generator transmits a painless electrical current that quickly cuts away the affected cervical tissue in the immediate area of the loop wire. This causes the abnormal cells to rapidly heat and burst, and separates the tissue as the loop wire moves through the cervix." http://womenshealth.about.com/cs/surgery/a/leepprocedure.htm

Painless my ass. They use a thin electrified wire to scrape at the girl's cervix and burn off the dysplasia. You feel like you're going to throw up, and during the procedure there is a burning smell and possibly some smoke coming from the vagina.

Do you seriously think you could knowingly expose someone to this and not even tell them??

And why are you starting a thread called "Am I required to disclose this information before having sex?" (about whether you should tell other girls you want to have sex with that you in all probability carry this disease) when you currenty have a girlfriend?

One point that I don't think people even have realized to it's full extent is that there are many different strains of this disease.

Let's say you have A variety, which is the less dangerous version and your new potential partner has B variety, which is more dangerous. Do you go forward?

After running tests they may have to have her come back for a leep procedure.
"LEEP uses a thin wire loop electrode which is attached to an electrosurgical generator. The generator transmits a painless electrical current that quickly cuts away the affected cervical tissue in the immediate area of the loop wire. This causes the abnormal cells to rapidly heat and burst, and separates the tissue as the loop wire moves through the cervix." http://womenshealth.about.com/cs/surgery/a/leepprocedure.htm

Painless my ass. They use a thin electrified wire to scrape at the girl's cervix and burn off the dysplasia. You feel like you're going to throw up, and during the procedure there is a burning smell and possibly some smoke coming from the vagina.

Ouch! I am so glad my gyno didn't choose that method. He froze mine off... it still hurt though- I had severe cramping for several days afterwards.

One point that I don't think people even have realized to it's full extent is that there are many different strains of this disease.

Let's say you have A variety, which is the less dangerous version and your new potential partner has B variety, which is more dangerous. Do you go forward?

then i bet the OP would wish she was upfront about it...:lmao: :lmao:

One point that I don't think people even have realized to it's full extent is that there are many different strains of this disease.

Let's say you have A variety, which is the less dangerous version and your new potential partner has B variety, which is more dangerous. Do you go forward?

Nope. Unless he is my husband. At which point, I'll have to think of something else. :lol:

Nope. Unless he is my husband. At which point, I'll have to think of something else. :lol:

something that sounds like bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz?
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

I know that it's not the wart variety, because I don't show any symptoms.

Are you married? If not, am I to assume that you inform your partners that you carry the virus if you do? Do you even KNOW if you do?

MAN.. IF U SPREAD THAT THING AROUND, IN SO MANY YEARS, PEOPLE ARE GOING TO DIE CUZ OF YOUR SEXUAL DESIRE...

I Think personally I would like to know in advance-If you knew before you were going to jump in the sack with someone new.That would be the responsible thing to do. Is to warn them- Then wrap that thing up!

Ouch! I am so glad my gyno didn't choose that method. He froze mine off... it still hurt though- I had severe cramping for several days afterwards.

I had lots of cramping during and after the procedure. It also made me so light-headed that I passed out while walking to the counter to pay my co-pay. It's not pleasant and shouldn't be looked at as, "Well, she can prevent the cancer I could possibly cause if she'd just have her paps and get these things done..."

I had lots of cramping during and after the procedure. It also made me so light-headed that I passed out while walking to the counter to pay my co-pay. It's not pleasant and shouldn't be looked at as, "Well, she can prevent the cancer I could possibly cause if she'd just have her paps and get these things done..."

I felt like I was going to pass out too. All I know is I spent the next two days in bed because it hurt to move... I never want to go through that again!

Oh, and yes, my girls will be vaccinated when they get to the appropriate age also. I know it doesn't protect against all strains, but any protection available is better than none.

Which also brings up this point: If you had a little girl, aside from the fact that you wouldn't want to think of her being sexually active at all and hope she makes the right decision, would you want a guy to tell her if he may carry something that could cause her harm?

I felt like I was going to pass out too. All I know is I spent the next two days in bed because it hurt to move... I never want to go through that again!

I know this is going to sound bitchy which is NOT my intention but do you think if Men knew how painful these proceedures are for women they would feel differently? I admit I do not know how painful circumcision is but I do know how painful childbirth, cramping, etc etc is. Do you think if they could experience any of this they might be more open to disclosing? Just a thought.

Oh, and yes, my girls will be vaccinated when they get to the appropriate age also. I know it doesn't protect against all strains, but any protection available is better than none.

Which also brings up this point: If you had a little girl, aside from the fact that you wouldn't want to think of her being sexually active at all and hope she makes the right decision, would you want a guy to tell her if he may carry something that could cause her harm?

I am going to get my kids vaccinated too. I will teach abstinence but I do not want anything to happen even if they do remain abstinent and they marry someone who was not.

Within the next year or two she'll have an abnormal pap. Once the infection shows up on her next pap smear the girl will have to get a colposcopy to determine what kind it is. A colposcopy is where they biopsy the cervix - yes, they cut out several small chunks of her cervix for testing. This does not feel pleasant, like pinching at your bellybutton from the inside.

After running tests they may have to have her come back for a leep procedure.
"LEEP uses a thin wire loop electrode which is attached to an electrosurgical generator. The generator transmits a painless electrical current that quickly cuts away the affected cervical tissue in the immediate area of the loop wire. This causes the abnormal cells to rapidly heat and burst, and separates the tissue as the loop wire moves through the cervix." http://womenshealth.about.com/cs/surgery/a/leepprocedure.htm

Painless my ass. They use a thin electrified wire to scrape at the girl's cervix and burn off the dysplasia. You feel like you're going to throw up, and during the procedure there is a burning smell and possibly some smoke coming from the vagina.


This was what I had to have done as well - first the pap, then colposcopy, then the leep / cone biopsy. Now my pap include a small biopsy every 3 months. Yeah, definitely hurts. Not to mention the emotional pain that it puts you through.

And for those that think the annual Pap always catches it in time - I would say not always. Mine should have been caught long before it became so severe, but it was not. Only other possibility is that it is a strain that moves so quickly it can become cancer in less than a year. That is even scarier.

I know this is going to sound bitchy which is NOT my intention but do you think if Men knew how painful these proceedures are for women they would feel differently? I admit I do not know how painful circumcision is but I do know how painful childbirth, cramping, etc etc is. Do you think if they could experience any of this they might be more open to disclosing? Just a thought.

I should hope so! I think that men have it lucky... seriously. You guys should be thankful. :P :lol:

Oh, and yes, my girls will be vaccinated when they get to the appropriate age also. I know it doesn't protect against all strains, but any protection available is better than none.

Which also brings up this point: If you had a little girl, aside from the fact that you wouldn't want to think of her being sexually active at all and hope she makes the right decision, would you want a guy to tell her if he may carry something that could cause her harm?

I want my daughters to have an honest partner yes and that includes informing them of any diseases they may/may not have. It's not just a health issue for me it's a trust/honesty issue as well.

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?

I have a feeling that no one will answer yes to question #2. I have another hunch that no one will answer yes to question #1, either. Even though, statistically, a good number of women and men will be carriers.

I know I do not have anything. Neither my wife or I have had sex with anyone but each other...

I know this is going to sound bitchy which is NOT my intention but do you think if Men knew how painful these proceedures are for women they would feel differently? I admit I do not know how painful circumcision is but I do know how painful childbirth, cramping, etc etc is. Do you think if they could experience any of this they might be more open to disclosing? Just a thought.

I would hope they would see it differently... Or at least those that seem to think it's not a big deal as long as cancer doesn't develop, etc. It also causes a lot of emotional damage. Any health issue does.

Tell your future partners you have it during your first climax.

"Ooooo oooooooooo ohhhhhhhhh I have HPV ooooo ohhhhhhhhhhhh"

http://temp.corvetteforum.net/c5/pigface/Huh/o-face.jpg

I know this is going to sound bitchy which is NOT my intention but do you think if Men knew how painful these proceedures are for women they would feel differently? I admit I do not know how painful circumcision is but I do know how painful childbirth, cramping, etc etc is. Do you think if they could experience any of this they might be more open to disclosing? Just a thought.

Women ruin it for themselves by saying things like "My cramps are so bad... imagine being kicked in the nuts all day long.." They are NOT the same. :nono:

Also, I know a lot of you are saying "But almost everyone has some form of HPV now..."

Okay, two key terms there: "ALMOST everyone" and "SOME form".

Not every person has a form of HPV, and of the many that do, just because they may have one form doesn't mean they wouldn't mind another, whether it's been found to cause physical damage or not. So let's not use the elementary phrase "But everyone else has it!"

This is a real, ongoing problem. Not something to be taken lightly.

You know, honestly, I think of it like this for those that are saying not all forms are deadly or really harmful:

Let's say a friend of your's has a child that has chicken pox, lice, or pink-eye, just for an example. Your child isn't immune, and you want to let them have a playdate. The friend didn't inform you that their child was carrying anything. Your child now has it. Yes, for the most part, none of these will cause serious problems, but the principle is that it would only be right to inform you of the issue beforehand so that you could decide whether it's something you'd want your child exposed to.

Women ruin it for themselves by saying things like "My cramps are so bad... imagine being kicked in the nuts all day long.." They are NOT the same. :nono:

Hey, sometimes they are. Women with issues such as endometriosis have horribly severe cramps (been there, done that also). You'd be surprised. I guess neither sex can really know the experiences of the other, but I wouldn't go out and say with certainty that it's not as bad as they let on...

Ah, but do THEY practice what they preach? I'd really like to hear from all of the people in the "YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" crowd.

1) Do you know with certainty that you have or do not have the virus?

2) If yes, have you ever told a partner about it?

I have a feeling that no one will answer yes to question #2. I have another hunch that no one will answer yes to question #1, either. Even though, statistically, a good number of women and men will be carriers.

I will answer yes to number 1, I know for a fact that I do NOT have the virus, I get a pap every year, I just had one in Jan. everything came back clean.

The pains are different. Getting kicked or hit in the balls is a pain that is different from any other pain I've ever had. Heck, even one just barely getting knicked will have a guy cringing a minute or two later.

I've had stomach problems before with very severe cramping, and while that pain is more sharp, and is very intense, nothing is like the pain from the balls.

If you get a direct hit on the balls, it'll be a very sharp pain right away, but what gets you is the continuous pain for several minutes, sometimes more that goes so deep inside of you and just crawls up your insides to your chest and even neck. It's not fun.

I will answer yes to number 1, I know for a fact that I do NOT have the virus, I get a pap every year, I just had one in Jan. everything came back clean.

I just want you to know I have missed you :blowkiss:

I'll make a confession here - I have HPV.

Now with HPV, there are only a few types that actually cause cervical cancer. Unfortunately, I have one of those types. But in reality, if your girlfriend doesn't have that type (don't know if her doctor told her or not) then you shouldn't have much to worry about, because almost everyone has HPV.

That being said... I wouldn't worry about it unless she has the type that causes cervical cancer. Other than that, if you happen to be with anyone else, I would mention it in casual conversation after you've been dating for awhile. Chances are, she already has HPV and it will be no big deal- unless, of course, it's the type that causes cervical cancer.

If she freaks out about it, she (the new girlfriend) is probably too dumb for you to be dating anyways. ;)

If a girl gets the precancerous cells, it's a simple outpatient procedure that will freeze the cells off (it's called cryosurgery). I had the procedure and even though it was a bit painful for me and definitely inconvenient for about two weeks while I was healing, but it was worth it because we caught it before it ever even developed. Still, I am getting paps every 3 months now until everything comes back normally.

I have a great gyno... my other gyno just ignored it when he saw the precancerous cells, saying that they may go away by themselves, but this one said that we'd take em off right away so that way we don't even have a chance of getting cancer.

If you have any more questions, feel free to PM me.

PG, while I applaud you for coming forward, I must say that your attitude of it being no big deal takes me aback. You usually give pretty good advice, but I have a big issue with some of your statements here. (and yes, I realize you said he should tell, which he should)


Don't forget that there are many women out there who do not have access to proper healthcare, have no insurance, and may not have the funds to go to a clinic. It IS a big deal. Just because you came out OK does not mean that someone else will. It's ludicrious to assume that "she may already have it". That does not make it ok, nor does it make it no big deal. What if a person does not have it? What if she gets it right after her yearly check up? She goes back in a year and guess what? Too late, honey, you have HPV (or) cervial cancer. All because (to someone else) it was no big deal because it can be treated and she probably had it anyway. Wow.


STDs are ALWAYS a big deal, whether or not there is a treatment or a cure.

You said:

If she freaks out about it, she (the new girlfriend) is probably too dumb for you to be dating anyways. ;)

:eek: WHAT? So a woman who freaks out over an STD is dumb? :shake: I'm sorry, but cure or no cure, treatment or no treatment, I want and deserve to know. Once I know, I can make my choice whether or not to pursue the relationship. Chances are, if he waits until they have been dating awhile (as you suggest) they have had sex. Then it's too late.

Of course, no sex before marriage is the best practice, but it is obvious that a lot of people do not do that.

I can't believe that anyone would see this as no big deal simply because things can be removed and frozen and one can get check ups. If anything, going through all that should show you that it IS a big deal. Think of all the time, the pain, the money, the resources that could have been saved. You're lucky you didn't get cancer and die. Cancer is no fun.

It is a big deal. It just IS.


PS


I am not yelling or attacking. I am just kind of dumbfounded.

One point that I don't think people even have realized to it's full extent is that there are many different strains of this disease.

Let's say you have A variety, which is the less dangerous version and your new potential partner has B variety, which is more dangerous. Do you go forward?

Interesting point ... just imagine

Him: Before we go any further, I need to talk to you about something very personal ...blah blah blah I have HPV ....
Her: Well, to be honest I also have HPV
Him: O RLY .... and you were going to tell me this when????? :mad:
:lmao:

... but seriously, how informed are most people going to be about wot strain is wot? You might think you already have it and then pic up another only to find it's the combo that'll do harm .... either way, casual sex becomes a thing of the past.

I just wanted to give a big :hug: to everyone here who shared their personal stories today. I'm sorry that you have suffered and I send you good thoughts for continued good health.

I just wanted to give a big :hug: to everyone here who shared their personal stories today. I'm sorry that you have suffered and I send you good thoughts for continued good health.

:secret: we made it to 170 posts without anyone losing a body part....it's been a good day :wink5:

There's a huge chance that the woman already has the virus, and if she doesn't already she'll probably get it in the future


If you were a father, would you be ok with your daughter having sex with her boyfriend if he said those exact words to you?

I can understand why people would assume that, but they easiest out would be not to post a thread at all. I was simply interested to hear the opinion of others. and maybe learn more about HPV in the process.

I'm not even sure if the virus is permanent! For all I know, it clears up in men. I haven't read anything about that. That's one of the things I wanted to learn. From a reputable source, that is.

I know in women it is often self clearing...men?

your question is ....

"Required" as in Required By Law?
or Morally obligated?

I think you mean morally obligated.

Let your conscience be your guide and I do think you have a conscience or you would not have thought twice about this or brought it up.

I think you know what you need to do.

I agree. I think you are in a little bit of shock right now, TheGoalie. I know you will do the right thing, or you would have never even brought it up here.

If you were a father, would you be ok with your daughter having sex with her boyfriend if he said those exact words to you?

You know..this thread really has me thinking about my own daughter. With just the H's alone: HIV, HPV and herpes...I am terrified at the thought of her becoming sexually active. I am going to do whatever I can to encourage her to wait until marriage..if I have to pay her cash dollars...I will do it.

PG, while I applaud you for coming forward, I must say that your attitude of it being no big deal takes me aback. You usually give pretty good advice, but I have a big issue with some of your statements here. (and yes, I realize you said he should tell, which he should)


Don't forget that there are many women out there who do not have access to proper healthcare, have no insurance, and may not have the funds to go to a clinic. It IS a big deal. Just because you came out OK does not mean that someone else will. It's ludicrious to assume that "she may already have it". That does not make it ok, nor does it make it no big deal. What if a person does not have it? What if she gets it right after her yearly check up? She goes back in a year and guess what? Too late, honey, you have HPV (or) cervial cancer. All because (to someone else) it was no big deal because it can be treated and she probably had it anyway. Wow.


STDs are ALWAYS a big deal, whether or not there is a treatment or a cure.

You said:


:eek: WHAT? So a woman who freaks out over an STD is dumb? :shake: I'm sorry, but cure or no cure, treatment or no treatment, I want and deserve to know. Once I know, I can make my choice whether or not to pursue the relationship. Chances are, if he waits until they have been dating awhile (as you suggest) they have had sex. Then it's too late.

Of course, no sex before marriage is the best practice, but it is obvious that a lot of people do not do that.

I can't believe that anyone would see this as no big deal simply because things can be removed and frozen and one can get check ups. If anything, going through all that should show you that it IS a big deal. Think of all the time, the pain, the money, the resources that could have been saved. You're lucky you didn't get cancer and die. Cancer is no fun.

It is a big deal. It just IS.


PS


I am not yelling or attacking. I am just kind of dumbfounded.

After reading her personal story, I also was slightly surprised to see that she had a bit more of a lenient attitude towards it than I do, although I do know everyone has different feelings. I feel for anyone that has to go through any stage of this or any other disease, because as you and I have both stated, it can become draining... physically, emotionally, and it's not free to treat or deal with.

I may be a little harsh in my views, but I just think that one less person that has to deal with this type of stuff, the better.

You know..this thread really has me thinking about my own daughter. With just the H's alone: HIV, HPV and herpes...I am terrified at the thought of her becoming sexually active. I am going to do whatever I can to encourage her to wait until marriage..if I have to pay her cash dollars...I will do it.

I remember the first few days having my daughter home from the hospital. I was terrified. I started thinking about her becoming her own little person, and it had me really torn up. I actually called my mother crying, and apologized to her for any stress I had put her through.

We will do our best to lead our daughters the right way, but knowing that there's an awfully scary world out there, it's not something I like to think about. That's one reason I know we will get the new vaccine. It at least offers a little more protection than I can own my own.

:hug: We will just have to hang in there. Thanks for your words in this thread, Kimber. I think we have very similar views. Hope all is well!

:secret: we made it to 170 posts without anyone losing a body part....it's been a good day :wink5:

..and just how am I to know that you haven't lost a body part??? hmm?

I think a full frontal would be in order here. :evil: :photo: ;) .....or I would be willing to do a personal inspection ... just for you of coarse. and any other red blooded female .... heck, I can't get anything just from lookin right? ... man that sounded worse than wot I meant ... oh well .. "Submit Reply" = [*click*]

She gets HPV from you. She may have different symptoms than you and may get vaginal warts. She may have the same symptoms as you and not know until she gets a pap.


Sorry but if he does not get warts she won't...warts are caused by a few strains of HPV. there are over 100 different strains. Read my earlier post for more info.

You know..this thread really has me thinking about my own daughter. With just the H's alone: HIV, HPV and herpes...I am terrified at the thought of her becoming sexually active. I am going to do whatever I can to encourage her to wait until marriage..if I have to pay her cash dollars...I will do it.


I have a younger sister, Kimber, and this is exactly how I feel. I am terrified for her. She is an awesome person, and I believe she will wait until marriage. But even then I do not feel like she will be fully protected. So many people take a cavalier attitude toward sex and what goes with it. It's very frustrating, and scary.

You know..this thread really has me thinking about my own daughter. With just the H's alone: HIV, HPV and herpes...I am terrified at the thought of her becoming sexually active. I am going to do whatever I can to encourage her to wait until marriage..if I have to pay her cash dollars...I will do it.

Wouldn't it be good if we taught our sons this also, so that they wouldn't get infected, and give it to their future virgin wives?

I found answers to a lot of my basic questions on this website.
http://www.thehpvtest.com/

You know..this thread really has me thinking about my own daughter. With just the H's alone: HIV, HPV and herpes...I am terrified at the thought of her becoming sexually active. I am going to do whatever I can to encourage her to wait until marriage..if I have to pay her cash dollars...I will do it.

My DH would not be okay with any boy having sex with his girls <G> thats just him :lol: we have always joked that they won't date until they are married.

OP, regardless of the statistics, etc.... if you ever want a future with any woman you plan to sleep with, full disclosure is the only way to go. I've been with my fiance for six years... if I were to now find out I have something that laid dormant but is suddenly active and he knew he had it when we got together, didn't tell me, and then kept it from me for all these years, I can't honestly say our relationship could survive that.

It doesn't matter how many people have HPV and don't know it, the point is you have good reason to believe you have it and you know it, and it's your moral responsibility to do the right thing. I think by posting this thread you already knew that though. Good luck. :hug:

Wouldn't it be good if we taught our sons this also, so that they wouldn't get infected, and give it to their future virgin wives?

:iagree: x 1000000000000000000000000

..and just how am I to know that you haven't lost a body part??? hmm?

I think a full frontal would be in order here. :evil: :photo: ;) .....or I would be willing to do a personal inspection ... just for you of coarse. and any other red blooded female .... heck, I can't get anything just from lookin right? ... man that sounded worse than wot I meant ... oh well .. "Submit Reply" = [*click*]

:fluffs skirt:
You crack me up stimpster :wink5:

Sorry but if he does not get warts she won't...warts are caused by a few strains of HPV. there are over 100 different strains. Read my earlier post for more info.

But we don't know he won't. And let's say two people both are infected about the same time, one of them may develop warts first. That was my posting perspective.

I remember the first few days having my daughter home from the hospital. I was terrified. I started thinking about her becoming her own little person, and it had me really torn up. I actually called my mother crying, and apologized to her for any stress I had put her through.

We will do our best to lead our daughters the right way, but knowing that there's an awfully scary world out there, it's not something I like to think about. That's one reason I know we will get the new vaccine. It at least offers a little more protection than I can own my own.

:hug: We will just have to hang in there. Thanks for your words in this thread, Kimber. I think we have very similar views. Hope all is well!

Thanks hun. Same to you. It ain't easy being a mommy. :hug2:

PG, while I applaud you for coming forward, I must say that your attitude of it being no big deal takes me aback. You usually give pretty good advice, but I have a big issue with some of your statements here. (and yes, I realize you said he should tell, which he should)


Don't forget that there are many women out there who do not have access to proper healthcare, have no insurance, and may not have the funds to go to a clinic. It IS a big deal. Just because you came out OK does not mean that someone else will. It's ludicrious to assume that "she may already have it". That does not make it ok, nor does it make it no big deal. What if a person does not have it? What if she gets it right after her yearly check up? She goes back in a year and guess what? Too late, honey, you have HPV (or) cervial cancer. All because (to someone else) it was no big deal because it can be treated and she probably had it anyway. Wow.


STDs are ALWAYS a big deal, whether or not there is a treatment or a cure.

You said:


:eek: WHAT? So a woman who freaks out over an STD is dumb? :shake: I'm sorry, but cure or no cure, treatment or no treatment, I want and deserve to know. Once I know, I can make my choice whether or not to pursue the relationship. Chances are, if he waits until they have been dating awhile (as you suggest) they have had sex. Then it's too late.

Of course, no sex before marriage is the best practice, but it is obvious that a lot of people do not do that.

I can't believe that anyone would see this as no big deal simply because things can be removed and frozen and one can get check ups. If anything, going through all that should show you that it IS a big deal. Think of all the time, the pain, the money, the resources that could have been saved. You're lucky you didn't get cancer and die. Cancer is no fun.

It is a big deal. It just IS.


PS


I am not yelling or attacking. I am just kind of dumbfounded.

After reading her personal story, I also was slightly surprised to see that she had a bit more of a lenient attitude towards it than I do, although I do know everyone has different feelings. I feel for anyone that has to go through any stage of this or any other disease, because as you and I have both stated, it can become draining... physically, emotionally, and it's not free to treat or deal with.

I may be a little harsh in my views, but I just think that one less person that has to deal with this type of stuff, the better.

I understand why you might be shocked that I'm so lenient about it but in reality, for me... it is not that big of a deal. I have dealt with a lot more than just HPV and precancerous cells.

I'm not saying that people shouldn't tell or shouldn't get the vaccine.

I just think that it's kind of silly that there's all this uproar over HPV when it is not fatal or anything else, but there's nothing out there about protecting yourself against chlamydia or any other STD that may not be permanent (besides the obvious- abstaining or using a condom), but can cause lots of damage to the human body if contracted once and especially multiple times.

Of course he should tell.

Of course people should get the vaccine.

But I think that more people think, "Oh my gosh... I'm dying... I have HPV... etc. etc." when it really is more than likely a dormant strain. But that's why people SHOULD get checked out... you never know if it is or it isn't. And that's why partners SHOULD share that information.

I'm not being lenient about the major issue in this thread: telling a person.

I'm not even being lenient about the vaccine.

I'm just saying... yes, it has caused people pain (myself included) but if you just buckle down and do the right thing and get your checkups and everything else, you will find that it is not as life-altering as you think it may be. At least it hasn't been for me so far. Or my mother or my sister or anyone else I know personally who has gone through the same thing I have. My mother had cryosurgery and all of that and she is happy and thriving and has 3 children.

Now for someone like GirlRacer, I think it's terrible that it happened in the way that it did and that she may not be able to have children, but she still has a chance because she went and got checked out. But I honestly have not heard any other stories personally of someone who did do the right thing and get checked out on a regular basis developing a strain this bad that they may not be able to have children.

I guess if you look beyond the words "big deal" you'll see that I really am an advocate for telling a partner, getting the vaccine, and getting checked out on a regular basis. And I honestly don't think that's lenient at all. Just my 2 cents.

You know..this thread really has me thinking about my own daughter. With just the H's alone: HIV, HPV and herpes...I am terrified at the thought of her becoming sexually active. I am going to do whatever I can to encourage her to wait until marriage..if I have to pay her cash dollars...I will do it.

For $10 I promise not to have sex with your daughter. :lol:

How's that? How is it transmitted? Skin contact? Semen? Blood? Saliva?

skin to skin...again read my prior post about HPV

OP, regardless of the statistics, etc.... if you ever want a future with any woman you plan to sleep with, full disclosure is the only way to go. I've been with my fiance for six years... if I were to now find out I have something that laid dormant but is suddenly active and he knew he had it when we got together, didn't tell me, and then kept it from me for all these years, I can't honestly say our relationship could survive that.

It doesn't matter how many people have HPV and don't know it, the point is you have good reason to believe you have it and you know it, and it's your moral responsibility to do the right thing. I think by posting this thread you already knew that though. Good luck. :hug:

I completely agree. If I were to find out my fiance knew about this and didnt tell me, I dont know if I could marry him. This entire experience was life changing for me, and he was by my side the entire time. If he were to spring it on me that he could have prevented it, I dont know what I would have done but it most certainly wouldnt have been good.

I have a younger sister, Kimber, and this is exactly how I feel. I am terrified for her. She is an awesome person, and I believe she will wait until marriage. But even then I do not feel like she will be fully protected. So many people take a cavalier attitude toward sex and what goes with it. It's very frustrating, and scary.

:iagree: And there are many kids these days who just engage in oral sex, believing that is acceptable behavior before marriage. HPV and other STD's can easily be spread in this fashion.
All we can do, is tell them. And maybe scare the crap out of them so they WILL wait.
Hang in there, we're all in it together. :hug:

Forget the name of the disease/infection, should you (a) disclose this information no matter what you had prior to sealing the deal or (b) wrap up your little buddy and just merrily bang away?

... don't people go to jail for having sex knowing they have HIV without telling their partners? Similar consequences to women ...HPV can be cured with a shot, HIV can't....BIG DIFFERENCE!

Wouldn't it be good if we taught our sons this also, so that they wouldn't get infected, and give it to their future virgin wives?

Absolutely. :nod:

My DH would not be okay with any boy having sex with his girls <G> thats just him :lol: we have always joked that they won't date until they are married.

Good luck with that! :lmao: :lmao:

For $10 I promise not to have sex with your daughter. :lol:

I doubt even Viagra will work for you by the time she is old enough for all that.

I doubt even Viagra will work for you by the time she is old enough for all that.

:sadwalk: That's right... I'm old. I forget. Because I'm old. :sadwalk:

My DH would not be okay with any boy having sex with his girls <G> thats just him :lol: we have always joked that they won't date until they are married.

Can their wives date too?

HPV can be cured with a shot, HIV can't....BIG DIFFERENCE!


There is no cure for HPV. There is only a vaccine, and it is only suitable for certain girls/young women.

:sadwalk: That's right... I'm old. I forget. Because I'm old. :sadwalk:

You big ole baby. You're not old now, but you will be in 30 years when she is old enough to get married. :lol:

There is no cure for HPV. There is only a vaccine, and it is only suitable for certain girls/young women.But doesnt the shot prior to gettting HPV hender the disease to begin with? Isn't that the point of giving them the shot at a young age? Maybe i am confusing the "and one" ad campaign with HPV..i dont know.
See, i am thinking of the strain that causes cervical cancer, not genital warts.

But doesnt the shot prior to gettting HPV hender the disease to begin with? Isn't that the point of giving them the shot at a young age? Maybe i am confusing the "and one" ad campaign with HPV..i dont know.

http://forums.slickdeals.net/showpost.php?p=6126546&postcount=103

http://forums.slickdeals.net/showpost.php?p=6126546&postcount=103

Kimber let me pose a question to you - mommy to mommy....Your DD is 17 years old and has been dating the same boy for two years....do you take her to get birth control or not?

Actually any of you mommies or daddies are welcome to answer. I'd like to have some thoughts on this.

And the OP only discusses the cervical cancer aspect, not that he has genital warts now.....and thats what i was stating. In that regards, the shot can prevent cervical cancer from HPV. But as a wise man once said: "Don't be a fool, wrap your tool" -Van Wilder
Thanks though Kimber.

Kimber let me pose a question to you - mommy to mommy....Your DD is 17 years old and has been dating the same boy for two years....do you take her to get birth control or not?

Actually any of you mommies or daddies are welcome to answer. I'd like to have some thoughts on this.

If I thought there was any chance they were having sex, then yes.

If I thought there was any chance they were having sex, then yes.

I'm glad to see we both tend to think alike then. Well I guess I'm going to take some heat for this but my oldest DD is 17 and has been dating the same boy for 2 years now. She says they are not sexually active. Do I believe her? I want too. Do I think they might become active? Of course!

DD and I discussed it and I scheduled her first OB appt to go in and get a physical and birth control. Am I giving her permission to run out and have sex? Hell no! Do I want her educated in how to stay safe if she does? Of course! Would I prefer she wait until she is married? HELL yes! I lost alot of sleep over this one, but only time will tell if I made the right choice.

Caydensmom,
Your a good mom for doing this...you are thinking realistically. I commend you for not being short-sided or narrow-minded.

I'm glad to see we both tend to think alike then. Well I guess I'm going to take some heat for this but my oldest DD is 17 and has been dating the same boy for 2 years now. She says they are not sexually active. Do I believe her? I want too. Do I think they might become active? Of course!

DD and I discussed it and I scheduled her first OB appt to go in and get a physical and birth control. Am I giving her permission to run out and have sex? Hell no! Do I want her educated in how to stay safe if she does? Of course! Would I prefer she wait until she is married? HELL yes! I lost alot of sleep over this one, but only time will tell if I made the right choice.

My daughter is only three but I think when the situation arises, I would agree with you and do the same exact thing.

I'm glad to see we both tend to think alike then. Well I guess I'm going to take some heat for this but my oldest DD is 17 and has been dating the same boy for 2 years now. She says they are not sexually active. Do I believe her? I want too. Do I think they might become active? Of course!

DD and I discussed it and I scheduled her first OB appt to go in and get a physical and birth control. Am I giving her permission to run out and have sex? Hell no! Do I want her educated in how to stay safe if she does? Of course! Would I prefer she wait until she is married? HELL yes! I lost alot of sleep over this one, but only time will tell if I made the right choice.

If she's not active now, let's face it, she's 17, hormones are raging. It would absolutely KILL me, as I know happened with you, but I would do exactly as you have done.
You are a being a responsible mommy. Good job with a difficult decision. :hug:

thanks guys :grouphug: I know there are people who wont agree with it. She's a great kid but my bottom line was she is going to do what she is going do with/without my permission. Sometimes in order to protect them you have to educate them so they can make these choices. Oh and if I find out they do I'm gonna kick her BF square in the nuts :nod: :lol:

I know this is going to sound bitchy which is NOT my intention but do you think if Men knew how painful these proceedures are for women they would feel differently? I admit I do not know how painful circumcision is but I do know how painful childbirth, cramping, etc etc is. Do you think if they could experience any of this they might be more open to disclosing? Just a thought.

CM ... where do you think the men got it from initially? Shouldn't the partner that gave it to them originally have disclosed this information?


... then again, if these women never left the kitchen and faitfully stuck to one man (at his beck & call) then we'd never have this situation!

:hide:

CM ... where do you think the men got it from initially? Shouldn't the partner that gave it to them originally have disclosed this information?


... then again, if these women never left the kitchen and faitfully stuck to one man (at his beck & call) then we'd never have this situation!

:hide:

I just meant in general when it comes to womanly pains. Now get yer ass back in the kitchen and make me some cookies! :whip:

Women ruin it for themselves by saying things like "My cramps are so bad... imagine being kicked in the nuts all day long.." They are NOT the same. :nono:

:bigeye: Imagine childbirth without medication ... then imagine someone teasingly threaten to perform it suddenly and without provocation.

I just meant in general when it comes to womanly pains. Now get yer ass back in the litchen and make me some cookies! :whip:

Better post directions to it.

Better post directions to it.

:rofl2:

Striker's post wasn't that bad ... had it included the spoiler after the last line that I was expecting .THAT would have been bad. :eek:

...on the King's chest

Sincerely,
<--- that guy

Better post directions to it.

Can't be that difficult. I normally just turn my head over my shoulder and order up whatever pleases me and then it arrives. The sandwiches, cold beer, and sometimes other OTs are quickly brought forth. How hard can it be?

I'm glad to see we both tend to think alike then. Well I guess I'm going to take some heat for this but my oldest DD is 17 and has been dating the same boy for 2 years now. She says they are not sexually active. Do I believe her? I want too. Do I think they might become active? Of course!

DD and I discussed it and I scheduled her first OB appt to go in and get a physical and birth control. Am I giving her permission to run out and have sex? Hell no! Do I want her educated in how to stay safe if she does? Of course! Would I prefer she wait until she is married? HELL yes! I lost alot of sleep over this one, but only time will tell if I made the right choice.

I don't think it would hurt to show her SOME of this thread .... just so she understands how realistic all of this is ... that pregnancy is not the only thing to worry about. Show her how pretty thegoalie is too while you're at it ;) ....

If you need me to edit some of my posts first, just let me know :lol:

How hard can it be?

:shutup:

:shutup:
This thread was getting dangerously close to being back on topic - something must be done!

I don't think it would hurt to show her SOME of this thread .... just so she understands how realistic all of this is ... that pregnancy is not the only thing to worry about. Show her how pretty thegoalie is too while you're at it ;) ....

If you need me to edit some of my posts first, just let me know :lol:



:shutup:

:fluffs skirt:
I'm not sure she;s ready for the lounge yet :lmao:

:bigeye: Imagine childbirth without medication ... then imagine someone teasingly threaten to perform it suddenly and without provocation.
go pee some stones from your uretha, and tell me if child birth isn't a cake walk compared to passing stones.

:fluffs skirt:
I'm not sure she;s ready for the lounge yet :lmao:

Do you think she'll ever be ready? :lol:

go pee some stones from your uretha, and tell me if child birth isn't a cake walk compared to passing stones.


I don't get it, girls pee stones out too? :confused: A childs skull is much bigger than a stone. My cervix ripped giving birth to my 6lber. Not trying to one-up you, but your example didn't make sense to me.

I've read some of the replies here but not all of them.

HPV can be serious. I know, I ended up with cervical cancer because of it.

When I found out I was pregnant with my last child, my pap came back abnormal. I have had to go for a pap every THREE months for the past FOUR year. I had a colposcopy every 3 months, even through my pregnancy. I had my daughter in Oct. 2003 and in Jan. 2005 it had advanced from dysplasia to cancer (very early stage.) I had a LEEP, which was HORRIBLE. The procedure itself wasn't painful to me. I was awake the entire time and had it done in my GYN's office. It was the lidocaine injected into my cervix before that did me in. It made my heart race SO bad I felt like I was having a heart attack. That sent me into a panic attack and caused me to hyperventilate.

I had some light cramping for a few days after but nothing major. For me, the worst part was the lidocaine injections before.

It has been almost 2.5 years since the LEEP and I still receive paps every 3 months. Thankfully, they've all been normal since I had the LEEP. But, I already dicussed with my GYN that if one ever comes back abnormal again I'm not messing around with another LEEP. It'll be a hysterectomy for me since I'm done having kids. BTW, it's definitely possible to get pregnant and carry a baby to term if you have HPV, I did. It's also possible to have cervical biopsies while pregnant, I did every 3 months for the entire 9 months. And, it's possible to have a baby after having a LEEP and happens quite often.

I would bet my bank account that there's A LOT more women on this board that have HPV that aren't willing to admit it or don't know they have it. I have never shown any signs of having HPV other than the abnormal cervical cells.

I have two daughters and they'll both receive the vaccination again HPV when they're old enough.

Lastly, HPV can hit anyone. I'm far from a slut. Shit, I haven't even had sex in well over a year. And for the record, since having my LEEP, my GYN tells me all the time how pretty my cervix looks :) So, there's nothing visible even there.

Oh, one more thing. I don't know if it's different depending on what doctor you see, but my GYN told me they don't even test for HPV unless you've had an abnormal pap. So, those of you that have said you know for sure you don't have it, you might want to make sure your GYN even tests for it routinely. It's my understanding a lot of doctor's don't test for HPV unless there's a reason to (abnormal pap.) And, you can still have HPV and have a normal pap, depending on how long you've had HPV.

go pee some stones from your uretha, and tell me if child birth isn't a cake walk compared to passing stones.


Don't get me wrong, both are painful....but I think passing a stone will bring a man as close as possible to experiencing the type of pain endured by giving birth to a child.....

:bigeye: Imagine childbirth without medication ... then imagine someone teasingly threaten to perform it suddenly and without provocation.
I don't have to imagine child birth without medication. I've done it 4 times already. It's nothing. As a matter of fact, I did the last one on my living room floor without medical professionals. I found the kidney infection I had to be 1000 times worse than a natural child birth.

I don't get it, girls pee stones out too? :confused: A childs skull is much bigger than a stone. My cervix ripped giving birth to my 6lber. Not trying to one-up you, but your example didn't make sense to me.

So you experience a little discomfort during childbirth ;) at least you have the option of being heavily medicated and can see it coming. Being kicked in the jimmy can come out of nowhere and that sudden flash of pain is instantly dehabiliting. I'm pretty sure that even during childbirth, my wife, numb from the waist down from drugs, could have the fortitude to hop her ass out of the stirrups and kick my ass if I started flirting with the nurses. On the other hand, it would take an act of God to get me out of the fetal position shortly after being racked.

I don't have to imagine child birth without medication. I've done it 4 times already. It's nothing. As a matter of fact, I did the last one on my living room floor without medical professionals. I found the kidney infection I had to be 1000 times worse than a natural child birth.

My wife would concur, she has stated several times that there are many pains worse than child birth, but I'm quite sure everyone is different.

So you experience a little discomfort during childbirth ;) at least you have the option of being heavily medicated and can see it coming. Being kicked in the jimmy can come out of nowhere and that sudden flash of pain is instantly dehabiliting. I'm pretty sure that even during childbirth, my wife, numb from the waist down from drugs, could have the fortitude to hop her ass out of the stirrups and kick my ass if I started flirting with the nurses. On the other hand, it would take an act of God to get me out of the fetal position shortly after being racked.

I wasn't comparing it to getting kicked, I was comparing it to kidney stones, ya brattycakes!! And trust me, those medicines do not work for everyone. I tried to get epidurals, then never worked for me. :crying:

I just want to add one more thing. It seems a lot of people like pointing the blame at the woman, but just remember, women don't get this from sitting on a toilet seat. It takes two to tango so both genders are equally responsible. However, it's the woman that receives the stigma associated with HPV.

Do you think she'll ever be ready? :lol:

:scratch: I'll have to get back to you on that one

I didn't have the luxury of choosing pain medication.... my daughter was born prematurely... barely made it to the hospital in time......

I've read some of the replies here but not all of them.

HPV can be serious. I know, I ended up with cervical cancer because of it.

When I found out I was pregnant with my last child, my pap came back abnormal. I have had to go for a pap every THREE months for the past FOUR year. I had a colposcopy every 3 months, even through my pregnancy. I had my daughter in Oct. 2003 and in Jan. 2005 it had advanced from dysplasia to cancer (very early stage.) I had a LEEP, which was HORRIBLE. The procedure itself wasn't painful to me. I was awake the entire time and had it done in my GYN's office. It was the lidocaine injected into my cervix before that did me in. It made my heart race SO bad I felt like I was having a heart attack. That sent me into a panic attack and caused me to hyperventilate.

I had some light cramping for a few days after but nothing major. For me, the worst part was the lidocaine injections before.

It has been almost 2.5 years since the LEEP and I still receive paps every 3 months. Thankfully, they've all been normal since I had the LEEP. But, I already dicussed with my GYN that if one ever comes back abnormal again I'm not messing around with another LEEP. It'll be a hysterectomy for me since I'm done having kids. BTW, it's definitely possible to get pregnant and carry a baby to term if you have HPV, I did. It's also possible to have cervical biopsies while pregnant, I did every 3 months for the entire 9 months. And, it's possible to have a baby after having a LEEP and happens quite often.

I would bet my bank account that there's A LOT more women on this board that have HPV that aren't willing to admit it or don't know they have it. I have never shown any signs of having HPV other than the abnormal cervical cells.

I have two daughters and they'll both receive the vaccination again HPV when they're old enough.

Lastly, HPV can hit anyone. I'm far from a slut. Shit, I haven't even had sex in well over a year. And for the record, since having my LEEP, my GYN tells me all the time how pretty my cervix looks :) So, there's nothing visible even there.

Oh, one more thing. I don't know if it's different depending on what doctor you see, but my GYN told me they don't even test for HPV unless you've had an abnormal pap. So, those of you that have said you know for sure you don't have it, you might want to make sure your GYN even tests for it routinely. It's my understanding a lot of doctor's don't test for HPV unless there's a reason to (abnormal pap.) And, you can still have HPV and have a normal pap, depending on how long you've had HPV.
:hug: Thanks for sharing your story.

I don't have to imagine child birth without medication. I've done it 4 times already. It's nothing. As a matter of fact, I did the last one on my living room floor without medical professionals. I found the kidney infection I had to be 1000 times worse than a natural child birth.

Kidney infections will take you to your knees, I know this, I have them often enough :(
It's also not fun to have a clamp placed on one's cervix while wide awake :bigeye: :nono:
Not sure the men here really understand the sheer number of medical procedure's women endure, in the name of healthiness and or sickness or disease :eek:

:hug: Thanks for sharing your story.
Of course, like you, it isn't easy sharing something like that :hug: But until people talk openly about it, the stigma will never go away. I guess for me it's easier because I don't care what people think of me. I know the kind of person I am and that's all that's important.

BUT, I'm a HUGE nag about women getting their yearly exams (and make sure your GYN tests for HPV.) Had I not gotten pregnant the last time, who knows what would have happened. It had been 4 years since my last pap before I got pregnant.

Exciting news (for me anyways lol) If my last pap I just had comes back normal, I get to graduate to paps every 6 months!!!!! I think I've paid my dues in stir-ups for a lifetime :lol:

I just want to add one more thing. It seems a lot of people like pointing the blame at the woman, but just remember, women don't get this from sitting on a toilet seat. It takes two to tango so both genders are equally responsible. However, it's the woman that receives the stigma associated with HPV.

Eh? Guys experience no stigmatism from HPV?? How do you figure?

Women apparently have a test.... guys don't have a test unless they break out in warts.

I went to a Dr and asked to be tested even though I didn't have any signs... the doctor laughed and asked "why?"

Kidney infections will take you to your knees, I know this, I have them often enough :(
It's also not fun to have a clamp placed on one's cervix while wide awake :bigeye: :nono:
Not sure the men here really understand the sheer number of medical procedure's women endure, in the name of healthiness and or sickness or disease :eek:
I know a lot of people have said that their colposcopies were painful. Mine never were. But, HOLY SMOKES, that LEEP made me feel like I was going to die right there. You know, not so many years ago they did the LEEP's while you were knocked out. I can now understand why. Lidocaine is EVIL :lol:

I know a lot of people have said that their colposcopies were painful. Mine never were. But, HOLY SMOKES, that LEEP made me feel like I was going to die right there. You know, not so many years ago they did the LEEP's while you were knocked out. I can now understand why. Lidocaine is EVIL :lol:

My colposcopy was bad... I definitely felt him snipping into my cervix... and I had cramps for a day or so... but when they froze the spots off I couldn't hardly walk. I was in sooo much pain! I don't even want to know what LEEP is like.

Eh? Guys experience no stigmatism from HPV?? How do you figure?

Women apparently have a test.... guys don't have a test unless they break out in warts.

I went to a Dr and asked to be tested even though I didn't have any signs... the doctor laughed and asked "why?"
Most men don't even give HPV a second thought unless they have symptoms. I bet a good majority of men don't even have a clue what HPV is or what it stands for. There's no test for males, which means they don't have a clue whether they have it or not.

You don't have to agree with my or my opinion, but that's what it is. An opinion.

My colposcopy was bad... I definitely felt him snipping into my cervix... and I had cramps for a day or so... but when they froze the spots off I couldn't hardly walk. I was in sooo much pain! I don't even want to know what LEEP is like.
Like I said, the procedure itself (and even recovery) wasn't bad with the LEEP. But I'll NEVER forget what it was like having the Lidocaine injected (it didn't hurt but a side effect is your heart racing REALLY bad and mine did.) My heart was beating so hard (or so it seemed) that it was effecting my eye sight. Each time my heart beat, my eyes when funny and felt like they were beating, too, if that makes any sense.

According to the website that slickchik gave us the link to:


At the moment, there is no test approved to detect HPV in men.

According to the website that slickchik gave us the link to:


At the moment, there is no test approved to detect HPV in men.


The most basic test is knowing you dipped your willie into a sump pump that already has HPV :eek:

Most men don't even give HPV a second thought unless they have symptoms. I bet a good majority of men don't even have a clue what HPV is or what it stands for. There's no test for males, which means they don't have a clue whether they have it or not.

You don't have to agree with my or my opinion, but that's what it is. An opinion.

Well... with all due respect, apparently you didn't give HPV a second thought either, until after you had it.

i've heard doctors stopped screening for it because 1 our of every 3 girls had it...

Well... with all due respect, apparently you didn't give HPV a second thought either, until after you had it.
You're slightly right. I didn't give HPV a thought because I didn't have a clue what it was. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way through cancer. If it doesn't physically affect a guy, why would he think about it routinely? I know it does have physical symptoms occassionally for males, but if it doesn't, do men think about it?

i've heard doctors stopped screening for it because 1 our of every 3 girls had it...


I don't think doctor's have stopped screening for this; with yearly Pap tests, they are looking for any changes in a woman's cervix; thus HPV, is picked up via this method; and when Pap Tests are done; if abnormal cells are present.

I don't think doctor's have stopped screening for this; with yearly Pap tests, they are looking for any changes in a woman's cervix; thus HPV, is picked up via this method; and when Pap Tests are done; if abnormal cells are present.
My question....do GYN's automatically screen for HPV or do they only do so when there are abnormal cells visible and/or an abnormal pap? I don't think the HPV test is even done when you are tested for other STD's (I could be wrong or it could be just my GYN's practice.) I know my GYN doesn't even test for HPV (even when pregnant and testing for the standard STD's) unless you have had an abnormal pap and/or there are visible liasions on your cervix.

You're slightly right. I didn't give HPV a thought because I didn't have a clue what it was. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way through cancer. If it doesn't physically affect a guy, why would he think about it routinely? I know it does have physical symptoms occassionally for males, but if it doesn't, do men think about it?

Ok you're probably right. The stakes are different... so I would assume the concern is different.

Women really seem to be in the power position though.. we can't be tested.. and seem to have outbreaks less.

Ok you're probably right. The stakes are different... so I would assume the concern is different.

Women really seem to be in the power position though.. we can't be tested.. and seem to have outbreaks less.

yes and no....both men and women need to be honest about either being infected/involved with someone who was. It's a two way street to discuss this.

My colposcopy was bad... I definitely felt him snipping into my cervix... and I had cramps for a day or so... but when they froze the spots off I couldn't hardly walk. I was in sooo much pain! I don't even want to know what LEEP is like.

I drove myself to and from my colposcopy. Good golly that was DUMB. I ended up calling my husband at work and not being able to say anything to the receptionist except "Send him home." I was curled up on the couch for hours. It was awful. I am so thankful I didn't end up needing the LEEP or the cryosurgery and I cross my fingers every 6 months when I go in for my pap test.

Well... with all due respect, apparently you didn't give HPV a second thought either, until after you had it.

I didn't know it was something to worry about until I found out I had it. If HPV was in the news in 2000 like it is now I would have been more concerned about it and would have asked my OB about it. You can be damn sure I'd have gotten a vaccine if it was available at the time.

Ok you're probably right. The stakes are different... so I would assume the concern is different.

Women really seem to be in the power position though.. we can't be tested.. and seem to have outbreaks less.
The stakes are different only because it can cause health problems in women more often and we have to think about it on a regular basis if it does (such as having to go through invasive tests and/or being told we have cancer.) I'm not saying it shouldn't worry men. I'm just saying it's visible there for us when we have to make trips to the GYN's office every 3 months, whereas, men don't know they have it so typically don't worry about something they're not aware of (I hope that makes sense.)

I drove myself to and from my colposcopy. Good golly that was DUMB. I ended up calling my husband at work and not being able to say anything to the receptionist except "Send him home." I was curled up on the couch for hours. It was awful. I am so thankful I didn't end up needing the LEEP or the cryosurgery and I cross my fingers every 6 months when I go in for my pap test.



I didn't know it was something to worry about until I found out I had it. If HPV was in the news in 2000 like it is now I would have been more concerned about it and would have asked my OB about it. You can be damn sure I'd have gotten a vaccine if it was available at the time.
wow, I'm surprised to see how women react so differently to colposcopies. I drive myself to and from each and every one I've had (LOTS of them lol) I also went to class after each one and felt fine. I've heard horror stories from other friends though so I do know women can have it tough.

yes and no....both men and women need to be honest about either being infected/involved with someone who was. It's a two way street to discuss this.

Very true... but guys have the option of being honest only when a woman has been honest and open first. (unless he's had an outbreak himself)

The stakes are different only because it can cause health problems in women more often and we have to think about it on a regular basis if it does (such as having to go through invasive tests and/or being told we have cancer.) I'm not saying it shouldn't worry men. I'm just saying it's visible there for us when we have to make trips to the GYN's office every 3 months, whereas, men don't know they have it so typically don't worry about something they're not aware of (I hope that makes sense.)

yup yup!