Keeping A Wedding Affordable.... How Much Did Yours Cost?
 

My fiance and I are getting married in roughly 7 months. :)
We're getting married it right before he deploys. :(

Anyways, I've talked with various people I know and done research and I know wedding costs can vary per area, based on size, etc. I'm curious though (for Slick Dealers that is), how much did yours cost and what was the basic break down (what did you spend the most/least on?)

We're trying to get an idea of our budget right now and thankfully Slickdeals has helped a lot so far for getting gift cards to purchase items and discounts and such. Unfortunately, the biggest cost it seems will not be the reception (food, decorations, etc) but rather the church itself. I've called over two dozen churches (three of which family were members of) and they are all quoting me prices of $1,000 to $2,000 just to use the church for an hour or two. We're currently trying to think outside the box but not having much luck as the local historic houses, rental houses, museums, plantations, farms, country club, bed and breakfast, etc are all charging just as much. :eek:

Also, any advice on budgeting, planning, etc is always appreciated. We're looking like a 100 to 150 person wedding with just our family and close friends invited. :lmao:

A friend of mine got married at a local park which has a nice garden area. I think it cost under $200 to reserve it. They then held the reception in their back yard. This was a very small wedding though.

The slickest deal of all would be to skip the wedding and elope.

courthouse... Why spend so much money on a single day in your life? Your reception is where everyone goes to for the free music and alcohol. Save your money and pay off a house/car/something.

my girl likes the idea of a casual beach wedding with only immediate family <15 people. seems ok with me and it shouldnt cost much more than $1500 if that. i hate huge formal weddings that cost ton of money...i wouldn't want one for free :eek:

3K for the wedding and honeymoon. Wedding 1.2K, honeymoon the rest. This also includes the dress, etc.

We rented a local senior center on the waterfront, bought cakes at Costco, had rootbeer floats to drink. Ours is the wedding everyone remembers, not the fancy 20K money wasters.

About 4.5k all-in for a 6 hour catered wedding and reception in a nice church for about 100 people -- so not 'cheap', but not extravagant. It was actually a great price considering what we got for it. The church had been converted into a restaurant, which was great, because we just cut the restaurant a check and they handled almost everything themselves -- space, chairs/tables, food, staff, sound system, cleanup, etc. Didn't have to hire anyone else and the wedding definitely didn't 'look' cheap with the cathedral ceilings everywhere. Our scenario was probably unusual, but it definitely saved us a boatload over the traditional piecemeal approach of renting the venue, then hiring a caterer, etc etc.

Oh, and the dress was also a great deal at $100, marked down from $600, not that you could tell. No need to spend thousands to get a nice one.

If you have friend or family in the businesses like photgrhy, food, music and such you can ask if they would be willing to help or get you a discount from their boss in lue of a gift. We did that and my wife's best friend gave her a dress, because she ended up with two, so we managed to get through it for about $600 for over 100 people. Used the church we grew up in for the ceremony, and the town hall/vfw hall for reception. Her folks paid but we still wanted them to get a kick ass deal. YMMV depending on what skills your friends and family had, we were lucky enough to have a cake maker in the church and one of my buddy's owns a blimpies so we had subs and a solid bar for the reception.

You had sandwiches at your wedding?

My wife and I rented a meeting room at Holiday Inn Express. We kept it pretty small, about 30-40 friends and family. My sister was a florist so she did the flowers for free, my mom is retired and stays at home, so she make the decorations and food (everything bought at walmart/sams club/kroger), my wife's wedding dress was found in the cocktail dress department at a department store at the mall, but it looked more like a wedding dress than a cocktail dress and was $110, the cakes came from Kroger bakery.

This is making me feel so superficial.

Agreed. I spent too much but I've grown wiser. I would set your budget first and keep it firm. I would consider having a smaller ceremony with close friends and family and then have a party for the 150. This will give you more flexibility on where to get married.

I would also look at local, state, and national parks near you - they have indoor and outdoor settings that might work well for you. 7 months out is not a great deal of time. I would focus on what makes you and your fiance happy. What about a local VFW or Moose Lodge? Some are located in older buildings with a party room.

BTW, Disney has some awesome deals for military families. Great rates, your own resort, Shades of Green, and cheap tickets.

I would sit down and talk to your fiance about where he imagined getting married. Could you have an outdoor ceremony? Can you get a location with the military? Is there a military chapel available near you? What about a local university? Sometimes they rent out a chapel or a party room? What about a boat? Is there a lake or larger body of water near you? Would you consider having your ceremony and party on the boat?

Spent way too much.

Don't regret it.

Spent 20k for a 40k wedding. No regrets. And still talked about and praised to this day.

To each their own :cheers:

If you want to cut costs, the single best thing you can do is not pay for other people's booze. However, the social ramifications of that might not allow it.

Ways to cut costs (without looking like it):
- have the wedding on an off-day. Either mid-week or Sunday.
- get dresses on a discount by looking secondhand, for "demo models," etc. In some places, they have a "running of the brides" where they have designer dresses at huge discounts. My wife got her 5000 dress for 750 at one of those.
- make your own invitations, save the dates, etc. It's really easy to do well, actually. Buy a kit and download the templates for MS word. If you have a decent printer, they'll come out great.
- make your own centerpieces. fresh flowers are a HUGE cost. If you're creative, you can make simple, cheap decos that look awesome. If you're not creative, look on google :)
- don't have the wedding in a big city.
- play DJs/bands/etc against each other. OR, rent/borrow a nice sound system and put together a playlist on an iPod (just don't forget it!). People remember the dancing and the good times the music CREATED, not so much the faces or names or whatever.

I'll probably come up with a few more later.

Congrats and good luck!

^ this.

if you do it right, you only get married once. i would rather look back and remember giving people more than they expected/needed/wanted than cutting corners to save a buck. there is plenty of time in the future to be frugal.

sometimes alcohol makes the party. buying cases of wine beforehand (watch out for "corking fee" or something similar) can be more cost-effective. we had a cash bar, but we provided a white and a red that were flowing for free, in addition to the toasting wine. if someone wanted to pay for a beer or a rum & coke, they could, and we got nothing but praise.

disposable cameras on all the tables were nice too, we got some excellent shots.

It is just a wedding. I don't need some lavish event to show everyone our love. Like you said though, each to their own.

Some people see cars as a means to get from A to B, some other buy luxury cars every 3 years.

I spent the most on Food, Flowers, Bar. Looking back on it, I wished my wife had done some cool homemade flower/design for each table. It would have been much cheaper. The Bar package was actually reasonable, but we paid for 2 hours of drinking for 100 guests. If alcohol is going to be available, I suggest paying for the first hour, or taking care of only beer/wine to reduce costs.

One thing a lot of people don't seem to think about is how the date of their wedding will affect their future plans. If you get married in the travel off season, then all of your future anniversary trips are going to be in the off season. If you get married in the winter, you're going to have to go to a tropical island to see some sun for your anniversary. If you get married during the blackouts, you're a moron like I am!

Ours was roughly $13,000. Majority was venue, food and booze. We got flowers wholesale and the bridesmaids arranged them the day before.

I am engaged now. We are looking for a venue where we can bring our own booze. We will have a pre-wedding party where guests are encouraged to bring a bottle of booze to help supply the wedding.

oh right. We did that too with the disposable cameras (though quite the mix of nice shots and "is that bigfoot?").

As for alcohol, making others pay is always the cheapest, but the savings differs depending on what you're allowed to do at the place. BYOB is usually good. At our place, the cost for the full open bar package only ended up being a few bucks more per person, plus it got extra apps and food, so it was quite a no-brainer. Sometimes the best slickdeals come from paying a little extra to get a lot extra.

My wedding is set for 6/28/14 -

Venue: $750
Reception: $8000-9500 (depends on headcount)
Photographer: $3500
DJ: $750
Cake: $500
Flowers: $250
Printed materials: $100
Dress: $? (She's going to Kleinfeld's, so I'll assume $4,000ish)
Engagement Ring: $3200
Wedding Bands: $300?
Tuxes: $350
My rental car: $200
Her transport: $?
Wine ice cream: $600

I'm sure I'm forgetting some things - but this is a rough idea. We've only just started booking things. We set the budget for $15,000-$20,000.

I'm not wealthy by any means - we're both younger than 25, have good jobs, own a house, etc. We've been together for over 5 years. I want to make her day special. I really don't need anything extravagant for me.

Its really a personal thing. I was at a friend's wedding last year - they spend about $4,000 total. It was a pretty good wedding, but the crowd was what drove it home. If it wasn't great people, it could have been boring. Their ceremony was the most lacking part (they used an ipod dock for music at a lake shore with boats going in and out - and the bridal march played four times while the bride trekked through the mud). But the reception at their aunt's house was excellent.

I also have a friend who spend $50,000 - their wedding was nice, but they put 200 people in a grand ballroom made for 500 - it was a bit too spread out. No real conversation. We didn't really know one another (guests).

Moral: money isn't the driving factor behind how good it is.

Affordable wedding... jumbo shrimp...military intelligence...


Spend it on the honeymoon.

:insane:

How about a 7-day cruise, once a year, for 15 years? Every other year for 30 years?



Going ahead with it anyway? Budget in a lawyer for the prenup.

People make irrational decisions. Weddings, having a baby, buying a house, etc. Just rationally think things through instead of letting marketing/expectations/etc decide for you.

People pay thousands for a stone that isn't even rare for a day no one will remember.

and everyone attaches value differently. some people attach immeasurable value to a paper card made by a child, and others attach no significant value to an ingot of rare metal. if someone attaches significant value to something, and you are planning on spending the rest of your life with that person, it makes sense to NOT make that something a crappy memory.

Are you attaching value or is marketing and everyone else that fell for that marketing telling you to attach value to it? ;)

There is a reason for divorce rates being so high.

The most fun wedding reception I ever went to was in a park (couldn't have cost much to reserve the pavilion), cake from the local grocery store, and the food was served in a buffet line, probably catered from the same grocery store.

The least fun wedding reception I ever went to was pretty much the same, but better food and cake because friends prepared it. Unfortunately, it was raining and unseasonably cold and there was very little space under the shelter. It would have been awesome had it not been for the rain. If you want to do something outside, have a backup plan for bad weather.

In my experience, there seems to be an inverse relationship between the amount spent on the wedding and the length of time the marriage lasts.

My wedding was fancier than I would have liked, but it was important to my mother and she was paying, so she got whatever she wanted. By the time we got to the sit-down dinner reception, I was tired and just wanted to leave but I had to pretend to be happy to see distant relatives that I didn't recognize. If I had to do it over again, I would focus on keeping things simple and short.

in the end, it doesn't matter where the value originates, it matters where it resides. if your wife [to-be] has always wanted a fountain punchbowl at her wedding, do you try to get her a fountain punchbowl or do you tell her she's a silly, misguided sheep in the grip of corporate marketing geniuses? keep it within reason, and don't be afraid to indulge a bit. it's supposed to be a special day.

there are almost certainly numerous reasons for the current divorce rate. that is not the current topic.

Says who? Why does it have to cost ridiculous amounts of money? Why do people have to rent a fountain punch bowl?

You can still indulge. Take the exact amount of money you are going to spend for one day and use it for vacations after you are married. You can have "special weeks and weeks."

Eliminating frivolous wedding expenditures is the topic. Statistically the chance of divorce is high. A lot of you are basically given your ex a really expensive wedding.

Disagree. If your wife to-be honestly believes that her engagement ring should be worth two months of your salary, she has been brainwashed. Go check out pictures of your grandparents and great grandparents weddings. Think those cost $50k? I bet if you called up most places and said you needed to throw a retirement or birthday party, the price is reasonable, but the moment you say wedding, it is a 300% markup, cause dumbasses will pay it. The whole wedding industry has radically changed in the last 100 years and it started with DeBeers scamming people into thinking diamonds were worth a crap.


Maybe your wife to-be, but mine won't be so shallow.

Just remembered one from our wedding -- scale back the fancy clothes. We had the groomsmen wear button-up shirts, ties, and nice khakis rather than renting tuxes. It may not necessarily save tons based upon rental costs, but rather than returning the clothes, you have a nice outfit for work/nice dinners.

Hooray internets! Thank you for filling an honest question and answer session with blatant insults and gross overgeneralization of consumer culture.

Telling someone they're going to get divorced because they don't want to cheap out as much as you think they should on a wedding is pretty much the definition of "how to be a dick."

Especially if you're going to claim "you'll remember your vacations but not your wedding so you should spend your money on that instead" like some people here. :rolleyes:

We tried to do things on the cheap as well. We were both young and unfortunately, my brother got married the same summer AND my wife's brother and her sister both got married that year as well (not to each other of course). Needless to say in our family we had a total of 4 weddings and cash was tight. We got the church for free but we had to pay the organist for her to play, even though we didn't use her. My wife is a musician and had her friends do all the music as wedding gifts.

So some things that we did and wish we had done to save money
- If you can not find a cheap/free church, I would recommend looking into a park or museum. A good friend got married on the grounds of a museum and it was beautify surrounded by the marble statues and a wild flower gardens. I think they made a donation of $100 and was required to set up and take down the chairs.

- Look to your friends and family for any special gifts they may have. My wife's dress was custom made by a friend. It was amazing with embroidery and bead work done. She did it as a wedding gift but we still gave her a really nice thank you note with money inside because it was so beautifully done.

- Friends want to help make this day awesome.... don't be afraid to ask. We had friends do our catering for us (looking back big mistake because it hurt our friendship). We had a friend make the cake (amazing). We had friends do the bar tending, and we had friends do the DJing. I think our biggest expense was the wedding photography because we didn't have any friends that did that kind of work and my wife REALLY wanted good photos.

- One more big piece of advice would be this. Figure out what is the most important thing to you and your spouse to make this day great and memorable. Is it the cake, the dress, the music, or the party? For us it was we wanted the reception to be a party. And for a non dry family, what better way to party with great music and some drinks in your hand. So how we saved money on this was by providing 2 kegs of beer with tap, a case of "Two Buck Chuck", and TONS of canned pop that we had collected from sales for 2 months leading up. We then asked all of our bridesmaids and groomsman (a total of 13) to each bring a bottle of their favorite liquor to share with the guests as wedding gifts. Most of them brought 3 or 4, so we had PLENTY to drink.

In the end, it turned out great. I have good memories from it and even though I would have done quite a few things differently now that I have planned one wedding, I am super happy with the way it turned out. It did not cost us to much in the end (a couple grand) but I think we got a great value for the money.

:iagree:

Heh. I see where you're coming from.

I do have a solid prenup - and i believe all trusting couples should. As well as various other protections because of my business.

Also, investing just under about a month of income is easily affordable. It really isnt that much money in perspective. We could do something like that every year and still live comfortably while maxing out Roth IRAs, both maxing 401k/403b, me putting a good chunk in SEP, and having comfortable cash on hand. I would never spend that much if we couldnt afford it.

It cost under $100, justice of the peace, no fancy clothes and didn't get the wedding bands until later. Neither of us wanted anyone around, family or otherwise so it was perfect for us. Hubby had to work later that day so we ate lunch at mcdonald's afterwards, lol. True story. :)

Two words, Taco Guy. We did a 150 person wedding for 4$.

Costco has some nice large serving jugs you can get for 10-20$ a piece. Margaritas help the booze go a little farther if you're able to supply your own at the venue.

I agree with the person who said not to tell the venue it's a wedding.

I did a backyard wedding but we rented tents, it ended up being around $4,000 anyway. We were misquoted on square footage and it ended up being almost double (orignal quote was $2200).

On the subject of weddings. Please do no invite any one. People either have weddings during the week and people have to take off or get married on the weekend and working people have to spend their time-off going to a silly ceromony they don't want to attend even though you will be divorced in 5 years.


Goes for your kids birthdays too.

OP has the audacity to want to defile "the single most important and sacred day" in a couple's life by making it "affordable." And I'm the bad person here for bring up a very real statistical probability? The OP could have asked about buying a house. Would it be just as bad to mention that people often change jobs and have to move a lot today? Seems I hit a taboo subject with you.

:seehear:

I gave my wife a $30k budget for our wedding. She spent $28k, which included $5k for the photographer, $17k for 10 course reception dinner at a restaurant. The actual ceremony was held at home (traditional) so that only cost about $2k for decorations, flowers, etc.

The good news is we asked for and received gifts in the form of cash so we ended up even. Each guest gave us about $50 each ($15k??), and my parents and family (blood and in laws) gave another $14k or so. We tactfully asked for the gift of being debt-free after our wedding, and everyone obliged which we're still grateful for. Only a few people gave us "stuff" like a BBQ grill and china, etc.

You gave her, huh?

Mmhmnnn

where the heck did you find a dress for 100:omg:

Clearance!

Okay fine, she demanded and I reluctantly agreed :O

Those costs for a photographer seem excessive.

Most of our budget was spent on the venue and reception (catering). The more you do yourself, the cheaper it will be though. Some things that we did to minimize expenses:

- Buy your own booze (definitely have an open bar if you're going to have a bar), make your own programs, invitations, table numbers, seating cards, etc. Just be prepared to spend a lot of time doing some of these things.

- Also look into online printing places like cafepress, mixbook, etc for a cheaper alternative for invitations, programs, etc. May wind up being as cheap as doing it yourself.

- Buy your table linens, and resell them after the wedding. We found ours online for about the same price as we could rent them from the caterer, so just bought them and plan to put them up for sale online for ~half what we paid.

- e-mail save the dates.

- Cut down your guest list. One person can be $100 or more, in terms of food, drink, dishes, linens, chairs, etc (depending on what your venue and caterer provide). Pare down the guest list enough to have 1 fewer table if possible. This is probably the simplest way to cut expenses, though not always the easiest. A 50 person wedding will be cheaper than a 100 person wedding in almost all cases.

- Figure out what's important to the both of you. Having a video wasn't important for us, but pictures were, so we spent a lot of time looking for a good photographer (and got one for a great price). Having fancy table settings and such weren't important for us, but having good food was. Figure out what you value, and put more of your budget towards those items.

- I would advise against having your friends serve you (photographer, DJ, caterer, etc) on the actual day, as (if they are actually friends) they'll want to enjoy the wedding, too. If they can get you a great deal on a co-worker, perfect, but don't invite them to your wedding and make them work at the same time.

Having a lunch/brunch wedding instead of a dinner wedding greatly cuts down on the booze expense.

There are so many variables/factors when it comes to the cost of weddings and how much you guys should/could spend. It's all relative really...

Engagement Ring - My wife has great taste which also means expensive prices. I too love quality items so spending that much money on a quality diamond that will last a lifetime is a no brainer for me. The look on her face when I proposed was completely worth it. I also live in NYC so this stuff is pretty "normal" in this area.
Venue/Food - Majority of the cost but super important.
Band/DJ - Shop around, there are PLENTY of options and you can get great deals. Ask your friends for referrals
Flowers - We weren't really big on flowers so we saved a ton of money here
Open Bar - Personally, this is a must. You want your guests to enjoy themselves and getting a little tipsy will help once the dance floor opens up :)

1) My rule of thumb is to not get into significant debt by having a wedding. Many "borrow" to fund a wedding but you should always have a quick payback plan or save ahead of time. My wife and I spent a little over $30K on a destination wedding in the Riveria Maya. We had an amazing time and it was very "us". Paid for in cash and we stuck to our budget.

2) There's 2 schools of thought here. One side believes you shouldn't pay so much for one day and the other side doesn't mind as long as you're within reason. Just because you don't want to spend more than XX amount of money doesn't mean the couple is "dumb". Sure, some things can be overpriced but it really is a special day and you shouldn't let anyone dictate how you want it. But really, who are YOU to tell people what they can and cannot spend? It's their money. But I would assume that most on slickdeals are frugal by nature hence all the backlash and judgement on those who choose to spend the money :D

3) There are always ways to cut corners. Make your own invites, recruit the help of family members and friends.

In the end, your wedding day is your special day but it's also a business for a lot involved. It's a huge market and there are so many options to choose from so whether you want to spend $1,000 or $100K...you will have a plethora of options.

Good luck and enjoy the experience!

My wedding was approximately 50k. I was freaking out about all the unexpected costs, but in retrospect, it was an excellent investment. I thought that 20k was the max we could afford, but her parents agreed to cover half. Apparently her dad still thinks I am some sort of tightwad.

Venue: $8,000
Photographers: $2,000
Videographer: 1,200
DJ: $500
Band/live performers:1,500
Cake: $700
Flowers: $250
Printed materials: $500
Dresses: $4000
Rings: $15,000
Tuxes: $1,000
Groomsmen/Bridesmaid gifts:300
Limo: $350
Alcohol: 5,000
Food: ??? don't remember
Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties: 1500
Honeymoon: 3500

What I learned from all of this:
-Most of the cost of bachelor parties comes from the groomsmen/bridesmaids. The main cost was airfaire.

-We shouldn't have covered the cost of dresses/tuxes. We did this for one bridesmaid because she is having money problems. She told the other bridesmaids that we paid and they expected the same :(

-Alcohol expenses can get out of hand pretty quick. We wish that we had spent more on wine and less on beer/liquor. There was extra beer left over at the end that we didn't get to keep, but we did get to keep the extra wine bottles.

-The BEST money spent was on the honeymoon.

Wow, keep the information coming please! I'm over here taking notes. LOL.

I am currently engaged and my fiance and I have been looking at wedding venues for the past month or so. Budget aside, I feel thatthe norm of what a wedding costs is very different based on where you are in the country. I am in the northern NJ/NYC area which is pricey and any decent wedding venue starts around $140 per person including all fees and taxes and goes up from there. The venues we like are even pricier. It is typical to do a cocktail hour as well as a 4 hour (5 hours total) sit down meal with full top shelf open bar for the entire event where I am. I have been to weddings on both coasts and in the midwest and it is amazing how different it is depending on location. I have been to weddings tht cost $5,000 and ones that cost $250,000. In the end just do what makes you happy and stay within your budget.

Don't get all caught up in the numbers. Its ok to go cheaper, just make sure everyone will have an awesome time and it will be the best wedding. Glitz and glammor dont create memories, Like antsmarchn ive been to 1k weddings and 100k weddings, I enjoyed the cheaper wedding more as a guest because it was more fun and less stuck up.

My own wedding ended up costing about 20-25k people said it was a great time, i think it was pretty well worth it but could have spent more or less in certain areas and been happier.

Another thing to note:

Many vendors give discounts for having an "off-day" wedding - typically Sunday, but possibly Friday as well (and bigger discounts during the week). But, if your guests will be traveling, keep in mind that having a Friday or Sunday wedding could be the difference between them attending or not. A kind of nice way to keep the guest list trimmed, but if the important people (to you) can't make it because of the day, it's not a bargain at all...


And average price does depend very much on location. Weddings in or near big cities will likely cost more than those in the far suburbs or more rural areas (other things being equal). On the flip side, guests may need to spend more money / time to travel to those far suburbs and more rural areas.

Cost to get married = $80 at local courthouse.
Cost to get divorced = $100K+ (no prenup)

Just my 2 cents. Want to keep your wedding affordable? Either sign a prenup, or don't get married.

Also, put your foot down now or never. If you're paying for the wedding don't let her nag you into having it her way. If you were really meant to be together she wouldn't have a problem with you using coupons for dinner and providing your own drinks instead of paying inflated prices.
It's a matter of principal, you're a slickdealer at heart and if she's the one for you then she should be too.
I'm amazed that this is the finance forum and people are claiming $20K-$50K weddings to be a good "investment". I don't know what you're investing in.

Same here. We CLOSED the bar. Nothing left Lol

Great times if affordable. This is ur big day and should only happen once. Might as well enjoy it.

- sent by iPhone App Deals & Steals 3.5.8 -

yeah its a special day but even given an unlimited budget i think there is only so much fun i could have in ONE day. but heck if the parents are rich why not go big?

We spent about $65k, the biggest expenses were on photography/video and the venue.

It was great, a bit too much for me, but we are frugal people that splurge every now and then.

Honestly we did a lot of DIY and leveraged "people we knew" - my wife's father is active in social circles (he's a member of various clubs, etc) and has lots of goodwill, so we got things like the venue (reception) for cheap, limo, etc for cheap (wife's uncle worked for one at the time) and relied on friends for other stuff like the "limo" for us (restored 1970's Lincoln Town Car a friend owns). Ethnically though (she's Portuguese), there is a lot to be expected in a wedding in terms of who is invited (pretty much everyone you've ever met), food (3 courses plus dessert), booze (lots) and length - 3PM until 2 AM, and live entertainment is all but a requirement. Consequently though, my IL's paid for the hall, food and entertainment. Wife and I wound up spending most of our money on the honeymoon - 32 day tour of Europe :)

That was possible with all the DIY I spoke about - DIY invitations, ceremony programs, hall decoration, novelties, etc. We used vendors (flowers, photog, etc) that were recommended by friends that did weddings on the side - you can go REALLY crazy with photos and flowers! We got great photos and flowers at probably 1/4 the cost of the pro places.

The amount you spend isn't necessarily correlated with quality though. We went to a wedding in Montreal last summer, same ethnics (wife's family) and the "hall" was one of those all in one places that does this for a business. The hall was certainly nice (albeit not much parking), however the food was meh, entertainment was meh, and it was very expensive - much more so than our wedding.

The upside to our wedding was that we took in about $18k in gifts (it's a Portuguese thing to give $$, and they typically write checks after the food, no joke). I'd say on an entire net basis (including IL's expenses), we probably came out $3-$5k ahead.

It also happened that the night was the same as the annual fireworks festival in town so we were treated to fireworks during the reception :lol:

If you have people coming in from out of town, you can try shopping around for a hotel - many will offer a package deal of sorts if you have over X rooms booked for the night(s), you get some rooms for free or a credit.

Honestly though, for all that was spent - I can recall one or 2 moments the entire night. I don't even remember eating or the cake or anything. Relatives still talk about it though, so at least they had a good time.

We just got married last year ... We didn't want a big elaborate wedding or reception. We went down to the courthouse with 30 people in tow and then just did a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant for approx 40 people w/ open bar. We had a great time and all the guests did too. It was nicely done and very easy going and not a lot of wedding fuss and hassle.

Big thing for us, was that folks spend tens of thousands of dollars and it becomes more of an entertainment event for your guests (and a lot of them don't enjoy it as much as they should) than it is a celebration for the bride and groom. We wanted only our closest friends and family to be there to celebrate our special day the way we wanted to do it...maybe we're just selfish that way. :) I think a lot of folks really appreciated the low-key aspect too. Our wedding was actually at 2:50P on a Thursday and dinner was from 4P to 9:30P. The off day was key to keeping costs LOW.

Rough budget from the top of my head was something like this:

Married by a judge at the courthouse + fees/license: $85
Cake: $200
Reception Dinner: $3000
Wedding Photos: $500
Misc costs <$1000

My wife still bought a dress, though she is the same size as the samples used at the bridal shops, so she bought a discounted dress that had been on display. I want to say that it was like $7K marked down to around $2K or $2.5K and she paid $400 to alter it (she's short and wanted it a bit less poofy).

http://1921foursquare.wordpress.c...3/married/ <-- few pics to share.

I'm not having any luck in finding a photographer under $2,000 in my area and we're a relatively small town. I've even called the surrounding areas!

We had a similar issue, but kept at it. Most wanted to include photo books and all that, which we did ourselves online (e.g., mixbook). We were able to find one who just took pictures and gave us the digital copies, for what we wanted to pay. Many also include assistants, which we figured we didn't need.

the assistants are very very very useful. different angles of the same scene.

the photo books, though, are mostly useless. how many times does anybody ever go back and look through them?

investment?

Not sure how a wedding could be classified an investment. Maybe they meant investment in the intangibles, like the great memories they had. Maybe it was the tangible items; the gifts, the photos, the videos. You certainly spend a lot more on the wedding than you get back between cash and gifts. I am planning a wedding now and it will run between $200-250 a person once you factor in music, flowers, and photo/video. I know I will be paying more than I will be taking in, but you do it to share a happy moment with friends and family.

It is a little ironic that you claim having more photos are very useful, but then claim you never look at them :lol: I know, the books are different than framed pictures or whatnot, but still made me laugh.

There is a tradeoff. For a smaller ceremony / reception, you may not need the extra cameras since it won't be hard to capture what you want. OTOH, you may want pictures of both the bride and groom's faces as they see each other when she walks out. One guy may be able to get both (not simultaneously, of course), maybe not. Depends on the layout of the venue. We didn't want the camera guy up next to the wedding party in everybody's view, but he was still able to get pictures of us both. You may have a very large venue that makes it difficult to get around to different angles. Everything depends on the specific circumstances, but if it works out, cutting the assistant may be a way to save some money.

After weeks of researching, I've finally found one who would do it for $300 for 4 hours. The next lowest was $500 for 4 hours. Then $750, and then it jumps up to $1,500 and beyond. That is just for the photos and a disc of them all.

Investment, into what?

Don't rember the numbers but not more than $3000 for everything (around 45 guests). Party started at 2 pm and last guest left at around 5 am the next morning. Was hell of a party :-)

I'm pretty sure they meant an investment into the event being exactly as they wanted it. Some people think it's worth 50k, others think it's not worth it at all. No point in telling someone else their opinion is wrong.

I do agree with you, though, in that you don't need to spend a lot to have a great time. To get the location you want, top-notch DJ/photographers/cake/etc, you're gonna have to spend a little more.

We spent 12k on our wedding. I wanted a courthouse wedding and my wife wanted a large wedding so we settled on a 30 person family affair. I really didnt want to spend a lot of money but my wife is usually very frugal and I am not so I decided she can spend a few bucks since she wanted a nice wedding.

It was at a winery in Napa Valley. We got married outside in a garden area near a pond and had dinner in wine cave. Almost everything was included in price. Planner, food, venue, photographer, pianist and cake. It was short and sweet.

I got married in August and our wedding was roughly $12,000. The largest cost was definitely food and alcohol. Our church was nearly free because we were both members, flowers from wholesale, wife's dress was only $200. We had 250 guests at our wedding and I believe it was $13/person for food plus $300 per keg (Bud Light!). We got married in Nebraska and venues were very limited so we ended up using one that only allows you to purchase food from their preferred caterer, which is definitely more expensive.

My wife and I don't have expensive taste so it was easy for us to cut costs at places. We didn't buy anything extravagant or frivolous. We had a friend do our engagement pictures and videography but paid for a photographer (at my mother-in-laws request).

If you and and your wife are focused on saving money, I really believe you can have an awesome wedding that is still affordable. I thought $12,000 seemed like a lot but it was hands down the best day of my life, and we were happy to have so many of our friends and family there to share it with us.

maybe they invited and impressed some really rich people who gave them 100k in gifts and hired them for their dream jobs?

15 hour party and less than $3000 in booze for 45 people? Couldn't have been that much of a hell of a party ;)


i kid, i kid :cheers:

Attending a cheapo wedding sucks. Just sayin...

Well, that party was over in Europe and you can trust me on what I said. It wasn't a fancy place but good food, good trinks (too much) and good music and people that enjoyed a party and not some formal shit.

We bought our wedding cake at a bakery around the block from the restaurant we were having our wedding and did not tell them it was for a wedding. When they realized it was for a wedding a few days later after we ordered and put the deposit down, they called us back asking if we wanted all sorts of "finishing touches" for ridiculous amounts of $ extra. They did not sound happy we declined everything b/c we bought all the little cake decorations at Michaels. We agreed on a $15 delivery fee even though they originally said free delivery since it was 2-3 blocks from the restaurant. It was a beautiful "wedding" cake that we got for a "steal". Save where you can but just set a budget that you can work with.

what?

I don't see how wanting an important day to be affordable gives anyone the right to be a pompous ass.

Douches that bring up divorce while someone is trying to plan a wedding are screaming for attention, immediately discount their posts. This is about YOU, not them.

It takes some soul searching to find out what is important to the two if you, the rest can be worked into the budget. If venue is important, splurge on that and cut back on other things. Prioritize your wants.

We are getting married at our home, after its finished being built. I happen to want small and intimate, casual and in the backdrop that we have spent to much time and attention. It's also a great way to bring everyone together. Later this year, were taking a trip to Argentina for dove hunting.

Above all, a wedding should not feel like the end of an accomplishment. Planning is stressful. A wedding is a celebration of a new beginning. So many couples find that post-wedding, they've lost focus on each other instead of having a party for everyone else.

This is about the two of you, and if others won't like it, please don't invite them!

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dove hunting sounds romantic