Joined Aug 2007
The Mayor of Moleterd
Forum Thread
I'm getting a Vasectomy next week!!
August 18, 2011 at
11:13 AM
in
Question
Limited OT, please.
Okay.......I'm getting snipped.
My GF's okay with it, but I'm kinda concerned how I break it to my little rich and cranky Grammy that the line will now end with me. I'm 40 and she still thinks any minute I'm going to get married and produce an heir. Hate to tell her but no little future Jon Boy nor Angus will ever appear in this lifetime. My sister has two children ( one boy and one girl ) but because they don't have the family surname, my Grandmother pretty much thinks they don't really count. She thinks we're all blue bloods and therefore "special" and already has big plans for my future MALE offspring. ( baby girls would be pampered but basically ignored, of course ).
Now isn't that special?
Any ideas how I can tell my Grandmother ( after the surgery, of course, as she'll try to put a stop to it if she knows ahead of time ) without endangering my life, my peace, and of course, despite my lame protestations of not wanting it, my eventual huge inheritance? I wouldn't put it past her to have me committed, pay the doctor off, or her feign a stroke or heart attack to stop me, so I prefer to tell her when it's a done deal.
Also, has anybody here had a vasectomy and could maybe give me some assurance that it's not really all that painful or dangerous and that ( big ) Sam The Sham and The Pharoahs will all still work correctly?
Discuss.
Okay.......I'm getting snipped.
My GF's okay with it, but I'm kinda concerned how I break it to my little rich and cranky Grammy that the line will now end with me. I'm 40 and she still thinks any minute I'm going to get married and produce an heir. Hate to tell her but no little future Jon Boy nor Angus will ever appear in this lifetime. My sister has two children ( one boy and one girl ) but because they don't have the family surname, my Grandmother pretty much thinks they don't really count. She thinks we're all blue bloods and therefore "special" and already has big plans for my future MALE offspring. ( baby girls would be pampered but basically ignored, of course ).
Now isn't that special?
Any ideas how I can tell my Grandmother ( after the surgery, of course, as she'll try to put a stop to it if she knows ahead of time ) without endangering my life, my peace, and of course, despite my lame protestations of not wanting it, my eventual huge inheritance? I wouldn't put it past her to have me committed, pay the doctor off, or her feign a stroke or heart attack to stop me, so I prefer to tell her when it's a done deal.
Also, has anybody here had a vasectomy and could maybe give me some assurance that it's not really all that painful or dangerous and that ( big ) Sam The Sham and The Pharoahs will all still work correctly?
Discuss.
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And also, that'll probably be easier to tell his grandmother, so long as he leaves out the part about him wanting to get a vasectomy in the first place.
They didn't have any "I smell irony" emoticons.
Well cool, you can't have kids and you didn't even need to do anything!
I AM STERILE.
And also, that'll probably be easier to tell his grandmother, so long as he leaves out the part about him wanting to get a vasectomy in the first place.
I can hear him now, "Granny, I have some news. I'm going to get snipped. Oh SNAP! I'm already sterile! No need... go back to drinking your tea.... Granny? Granny???"
I can hear him now, "Granny, I have some news. I'm going to get snipped. Oh SNAP! I'm already sterile! No need... go back to drinking your tea.... Granny? Granny???"
How ironic, eh?
Makes you almost believe in Fate, huh?
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http://www.theatlantic
I AM STERILE.
On another note: I have been away but will soon be coming back on a more regular basis. I miss being on SD and all the nice people (like you). This was suppose to be the year of not doing remodels/projects around the house but then we painted, found stained glass lamps on clearance, then decided to do some stone work and now I want to paint the wrought iron fences. I seem to not know when to stop but I am happy in the end how things are turning out. I hope you feel better with the news and just maybe (don't count on it), you might get some sympathy from Grandma. She also might send you out to get probed so you might want to keep it between the two of you. Enjoy the rest of the weekend, as for me "going to church" means baking. It's a good religion and Hubby does not mind. I'm thinking Boysenberry pies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ee...re
I AM STERILE.
Congratulations!
OR
Are your swimmer's there but not so many of them, they don't swim fast enough, etc. etc. (aka: You would have better chance of getting hit by lightening or winning the lotto--two things which DO happen to people once in a while!!)
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OR
Are your swimmer's there but not so many of them, they don't swim fast enough, etc. etc. (aka: You would have better chance of getting hit by lightening or winning the lotto--two things which DO happen to people once in a while!!)
I have no swimmers period. No sperm present whatever. Zero count was what the test said, not just slow swimmers or low sperm count. NO COUNT at all could be detected in seminal specimen they tested. They have asked to run a second one next week.
Doc said it might possibly have been caused by my gonads being ruptured in the motorcyle accident years ago and mentioned maybe scar tissue had formed, since all the other questions he asked me I answered NO to. Don't, ( nor have ever had ) any trouble ever with getting erections or maintaining one, and no problems with sex at all, so not just simple like an Erectile Dysfunction. I've never had German measles, Mumps, Scarlet Fever, nor radiation treatments, etc. which were things he said could cause complete sterility and they will run tests for other things when I go back for my appointment. Will also be looking for tumors and any metastic cancer, ( since I had a large and sudden weight loss a few months back ), and will test for glandular problems and I already have another MRI scheduled. ( first one will just look at my reproductive organs and then a full total body type scan later ). Most of the tests are relatively pain free except for the one where they are going to "aspirate" the fluid out through my pee pee hole, ( urethra ) instead of me "providing" a sample the usual way..
He also is scheduling me ( if the other tests are all negative ) to let the surgeon go in and look for an obstruction of any sort. Not looking forward to that either, although he said I would be under general anethesia and wouldn't be awake during it at all. Other than that......
Only benefit I see right now is no vasectomy now needed.
.