My 4yr old was left at his dad's home w/ a 10 and 8 yr old...what do I do?

In WI you can be 12 years old and certified to watch other peoples kids, but there is no actual minimum age for watching other kids.

In the end it depends on the maturity of the children. I would have no problems leaving my nine year old daughter home for 20 minutes. She has known how to call 911 since she was five. She knows not to answer the door or the phone. Not to use the microwave. She is very responsible. But I would not leave her with her six year old sister because they fight too much.

What you need to do is teach your son how to call 911 and what emergencies are for when he should call 911. Teach him his phone # and address. Teach him your cell phone # so that he can call you if he doesn't feel safe. These are all things he needs to know for his own safety regardless of who is watching him. Teach him to not answer the door or the phone if no adults are in the house. You are responsible for making your son responsible.

My 11 yo can beat up your 9 yo. What do you have to say to that?

My 11 yo can beat up your 9 yo. What do you have to say to that?

In the end it depends on the maturity of the children. I would have no problems leaving my nine year old daughter home for 20 minutes. She has known how to call 911 since she was five. She knows not to answer the door or the phone. Not to use the microwave. She is very responsible. But I would not leave her with her six year old sister because they fight too much.

ok, I will TRY to help out a bit.

OP, if your first thought is to lawyer up, you need to take a long look in the mirror and get your head right. I can only imagine the way you approached your ex when you learned of the situation, and I can probably understand why he would get defensive.

The first thing you should have done was calmed down, and tried to understand the situation from both sides. Then when you are calm and have thought about it a bit, think about what you would like to happen or change in the future. With your knee jerk reaction, what did you want to happen? Take away his custody? Is that what you want? Why? Or do you just want him to watch your son better? If its the latter, then a simple email or phone call would probably suffice. If its the former, then this situation has nothing to do with what you want.

Anyway, moving forward. You could probably say something like:

"Hey , sorry about the conversation the other day about . I was a little out of line with my tone and want to apologize. That being said, I am still concerned about having your GFs children watch , even if its for a few minutes. I know situations may come up when its not that convenient to take with you, but I would feel more comfortable if you would could just please have him go with you so that I know a responsible and caring person is always watching him. I know you would never want to put in a dangerous situation, and neither would I. And just as you have every right to know that is safe with me, I want to be assured that he is safe with you.

I really appreciate your consideration in this, and again I apologize for my tone the other day"

My one week old can throw up on your 11 year old. What do you have to say to that?

I think your 11 yo can beat up me!

I have no idea if what the OP describes is endangerment or abuse or whatever, but there certainly ought to be a term that describes what an innocent child goes through when they have their lives uprooted every single week of the farking year to go live in a different house with their other parent because it is "their turn".

The kids always pay the biggest price for the choices of their parents.

http://www.cnn.com/2013/02/18/us/...?hpt=us_c2

Three Michigan children reportedly left alone in their family's apartment died in a fire Monday afternoon, a public safety official said.

The fire broke out around 2 p.m. in Kalamazoo, said Brian Uridge, assistant chief of public safety. Two of the children were 3 years old, and the third was 1, Uridge said.

"You could see smoke from blocks away," Uridge said. The main floor of the apartment building was engulfed in flames when firefighters arrived, and "they found three kids who had already perished as a result of the fire," he said. The cause of the fire is unknown, he said.

The children's parents were at the scene, Uridge said.

"Initially, we have information that the kids were left alone in the apartment, but we can't talk about charges because it's too early in the investigation," Uridge said.

The victims' identities have not been released.

If the OP had those skills the divorce might never have happened.

LOL

Thats not necessarily true... I have those skills and I just got divorced

But yeah, I have had to deal with my ex doing stupid shit and have had to calm down and be diplomatic...

I know, I don't really believe it completely, but merely looking for a rise out of them