Joined Jun 2003
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Would you advise your cousin's girlfriend not to get engaged? *UPDATED!!*
December 8, 2015 at
12:09 PM
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Ok, this is about my wife's 23 yr old cousin. He and his girlfriend have been together off and on for about 4 years now.
Doesn't go to school and has no idea what he wants to do. He has no ambition for anything bigger. And if he does, it would be to become a nfl football player.
Lives at home. Up until recently mom would finance everything for him. With mom's money he bought his gf a Tiffany's ring (birthday gift). Just recently got a part time at a fast food place.
She is 22 yrs old and has a full time job and goes to school full time. We absolutely love her and have gotten to know her very well because she babysat for us. She'll come spend the weekend with us, etc etc. We've been there for her when they are broken up.
She has been living "on her own" since she was 16. It basically means that she has been bouncing around from aunt to aunt and then ended up living at my wife's aunt's house. A room became available once the aunt's son went off to college. Aunt didn't want to have an empty house, so she gladly moved in free of charge.
The girl is in love with my wife's family. It's a huge family and everyone loves her. She's always wanted to be a part of a big family.
Aunt's house has been under renovation for the last few months. So now she has been "living" at her bf's house on the couch. It's a two bedroom house. The mom and dad have one room and the other room is for his sister who is 20 and pregnant. He sleeps on couch and she sleeps on the other couch.
The girl is in love with "getting married". I think the act of it mostly. She's always had a timeline of when things need to be done.
We're a huge fan of hers, him not so much. We've encouraged her to venture out to date other guys. The last time he dumped her was while she was in the hospital. She understands that he is a total loser, but she loves him anyways.
He called us last Friday as we were walking out the door. He never calls us. He said that he had something to tell us in person. He told my wife's brother, which in turn told us. Something big is supposed to go down on Dec 19th. I'm sure he is calling to invite us, but we really don't don't necessarily "support" the engagement. I'm sure she will say "yes" because she was so excited a few weeks ago when my brother-in-law got engaged. Like I said, I think she in love with the "act" of doing all these things.
Damnit, why can't she just find someone better!
Doesn't go to school and has no idea what he wants to do. He has no ambition for anything bigger. And if he does, it would be to become a nfl football player.
Lives at home. Up until recently mom would finance everything for him. With mom's money he bought his gf a Tiffany's ring (birthday gift). Just recently got a part time at a fast food place.She is 22 yrs old and has a full time job and goes to school full time. We absolutely love her and have gotten to know her very well because she babysat for us. She'll come spend the weekend with us, etc etc. We've been there for her when they are broken up.
She has been living "on her own" since she was 16. It basically means that she has been bouncing around from aunt to aunt and then ended up living at my wife's aunt's house. A room became available once the aunt's son went off to college. Aunt didn't want to have an empty house, so she gladly moved in free of charge.
The girl is in love with my wife's family. It's a huge family and everyone loves her. She's always wanted to be a part of a big family.
Aunt's house has been under renovation for the last few months. So now she has been "living" at her bf's house on the couch. It's a two bedroom house. The mom and dad have one room and the other room is for his sister who is 20 and pregnant. He sleeps on couch and she sleeps on the other couch.
The girl is in love with "getting married". I think the act of it mostly. She's always had a timeline of when things need to be done.
We're a huge fan of hers, him not so much. We've encouraged her to venture out to date other guys. The last time he dumped her was while she was in the hospital. She understands that he is a total loser, but she loves him anyways.
He called us last Friday as we were walking out the door. He never calls us. He said that he had something to tell us in person. He told my wife's brother, which in turn told us. Something big is supposed to go down on Dec 19th. I'm sure he is calling to invite us, but we really don't don't necessarily "support" the engagement. I'm sure she will say "yes" because she was so excited a few weeks ago when my brother-in-law got engaged. Like I said, I think she in love with the "act" of doing all these things.
Damnit, why can't she just find someone better!
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Ultimately we really care about her and we want her to be Happy. We were probably the closest to her than anyone else. She really looked up to us as a married couple. We felt that we gave her some good advice for a solid foundation. She turned around and did what she wanted. It's okay, it's her life. We are not mad at her for that, but we also decided that we didn't want to be part of a celebration for a marriage that we didn't necessarily agree with. My wife and I didn't want to be putting up fake smiles with something we didn't support. It was best for her to not have us around her, and vice versa.
Obviously we will see her again since she is now family and all. Good luck to them, they'll need it!
That's the situation you're in.