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Fark My Life

26,668 2,340 February 12, 2009 at 05:35 AM in Humor (2)
http://www.fmylife.com/
Quote :
Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired.
Quote :
Today, I accidentally kicked a child down a set of steps. I work in a kids play area.
Quote :
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He responded with "Who the hell are you?"
Quote :
Today, I cut myself of a bandaid box, while trying to get a bandaid out for another cut.
Crylol Roll Rofl2 LMAO laugh out loud
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Joined Mar 2004
neologismist
> bubble2 4,234 Posts
498 Reputation
dinsomnia
04-06-2009 at 11:04 PM.
04-06-2009 at 11:04 PM.
Quote from #sevenstinks :
I am now totally addicted to this website.
Me too. I have an app for my phone for it. I'm one click away from FMLs at all times haha
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Joined Nov 2003
Double Staff Oreos
> bubble2 26,891 Posts
2,390 Reputation
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rayzac | Staff
04-08-2009 at 08:57 PM.
04-08-2009 at 08:57 PM.
Quote :
Today, I put my AIM status on my Current iTunes song. It also does it for videos I don't know. I've downloaded a lot of porn in my iTunes, and I wanted to watch. My status on AIM was "Girl in Latex gets farked in the ass." FML
And that is why I NEVER added that add on.
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Joined Jan 2008
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 7,328 Posts
487 Reputation
BayArea
04-08-2009 at 09:08 PM.
04-08-2009 at 09:08 PM.
Quote from rayzac :
And that is why I NEVER added that add on.
you watch girls in latex getting farked?
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Joined Oct 2006
Freak On A Leash
> bubble2 3,781 Posts
2,418 Reputation
Princess Crunch
04-08-2009 at 09:10 PM.
04-08-2009 at 09:10 PM.
Quote from BayArea :
you watch girls in latex getting farked?
Bigeye LMAO
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Joined Nov 2003
Double Staff Oreos
> bubble2 26,891 Posts
2,390 Reputation
Global Mod
rayzac | Staff
04-08-2009 at 09:17 PM.
04-08-2009 at 09:17 PM.
Quote from BayArea :
you watch girls in latex getting farked?
Sometimes, yes. EEK!
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Joined Jan 2008
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 7,328 Posts
487 Reputation
BayArea
04-09-2009 at 12:14 AM.
04-09-2009 at 12:14 AM.
Quote from rayzac :
Sometimes, yes. EEK!
EEK!
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Joined Nov 2003
Double Staff Oreos
> bubble2 26,891 Posts
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rayzac | Staff
04-09-2009 at 05:25 AM.
04-09-2009 at 05:25 AM.
Quote from BayArea :
EEK!
I have eclectic tastes.
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Joined Aug 2006
Two of a kind.
> bubble2 3,959 Posts
1,588 Reputation
Norgechica
04-10-2009 at 02:12 PM.
04-10-2009 at 02:12 PM.
Quote :
Today, I was riding on a stationary exercise bike at home, when I went to get off, my shorts got stuck under the seat. I dangled half upside down until my shorts ripped and I fell on the ground face first breaking my front tooth. I broke my tooth riding a bike that doesn't even move. FML
I don't know why, but I almost peed my pants after reading this one. laugh out loud
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Joined Jun 2004
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 27,801 Posts
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Pig
04-10-2009 at 04:08 PM.
04-10-2009 at 04:08 PM.
Today, I asked everybody who wanted a pervy PM to reply to my post. I got two replies.....in 8 hours. One of them was from Autumn. FML
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Joined Oct 2007
I ♡ HIMYM
> bubble2 2,655 Posts
881 Reputation
jaded.echo
04-10-2009 at 04:16 PM.
04-10-2009 at 04:16 PM.
Roll Im still waiting for my pervy PM, pig. Ranting
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Joined Dec 2006
L6: Expert
> bubble2 1,903 Posts
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Billiam411
04-12-2009 at 09:34 AM.
04-12-2009 at 09:34 AM.
Quote :
Today, I was cuddling with the guy I like. I looked into his eyes and said, "Your eyes are so blue, like the ocean." He replied by saying, "Your eyes are so brown... like my shit". FML
Roll
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Joined Dec 2004
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 70,217 Posts
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Schooby
04-12-2009 at 09:45 AM.
04-12-2009 at 09:45 AM.
laugh out loud these are good.





poor Pig.
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Joined May 2004
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 8,581 Posts
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WoodyWoodPecker
04-12-2009 at 10:19 AM.
04-12-2009 at 10:19 AM.
This 1 is hilarious ! Rofl2 Today, I was sitting using my laptop, I was also eating a bag of starbursts. They bag slid off the bed, I went to catch them and in the process my knee hit my laptop which flew off the bed onto the wooden floor, and shattered. I broke my $2,500 laptop to save 11 starbursts from falling. FML
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Joined Sep 2006
IVIodel citizen
> bubble2 19,431 Posts
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Fallacy
04-17-2009 at 09:01 AM.
04-17-2009 at 09:01 AM.
Quote :
Today, I sent a cover letter to a potential employer. In the letter, I talked about my great attention to detail, my strong ability to focus, and my stellar writing skills. After hitting send, I reread the letter and noticed that I typed my name "B-R-A-I-N." My name is Brian. FML
Briang is that you?
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Joined Nov 2003
Double Staff Oreos
> bubble2 26,891 Posts
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rayzac | Staff
04-17-2009 at 09:37 AM.
04-17-2009 at 09:37 AM.
Quote from WoodyWoodPecker :
This 1 is hilarious ! Rofl2 Today, I was sitting using my laptop, I was also eating a bag of starbursts. They bag slid off the bed, I went to catch them and in the process my knee hit my laptop which flew off the bed onto the wooden floor, and shattered. I broke my $2,500 laptop to save 11 starbursts from falling. FML
I think it's more funny someone paid $2,500 for a laptop.
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