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OMG! The Bible has some raunchy stories in it man!

2,709 230 April 20, 2009 at 07:01 PM in Humor
So I'm resting and relaxing today... Come home, take a relaxing shower (not a great day today) and decided to have the house nice and quiet and just read the Bible today...

So I just start out with Genesis - I figure, hey, its been a while since I made a quest to read the Bible front to back, so why not now.

I get to Genesis 19: 4-8 and holy crap... there is some taboo stuff in there I had completely forgotten about.

Gen 19: 4-8
Quote :
Before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodomboth young and oldsurrounded the house. 5 They called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them."
6 Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him 7 and said, "No, my friends. Don't do this wicked thing. 8 Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don't do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof."
EEK! (They were talking about the men in Sodom wanting to have sex with the very angels that came there to see if they were going to destroy Sodom).

edit: btw, this is NOT a gay bashing thread or meant to offend or ridicule gay people. I just thought the above was "taboo" - or at least taboo for me...

And then a little bit later...

Gen. 19: 31-38

Quote :
One day the older daughter said to the younger, "Our father is old, and there is no man around here to lie with us, as is the custom all over the earth. 32 Let's get our father to drink wine and then lie with him and preserve our family line through our father."

33 That night they got their father to drink wine, and the older daughter went in and lay with him. He was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up.
34 The next day the older daughter said to the younger, "Last night I lay with my father. Let's get him to drink wine again tonight, and you go in and lie with him so we can preserve our family line through our father." 35 So they got their father to drink wine that night also, and the younger daughter went and lay with him. Again he was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up. 36 So both of Lot's daughters became pregnant by their father. 37 The older daughter had a son, and she named him Moab; he is the father of the Moabites of today. 38 The younger daughter also had a son, and she named him Ben-Ammi; he is the father of the Ammonites of today.
I completely dont remember reading anything like this when I read through Genesis. Holy carp! The Bible is truly an interesting read at some points.
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Hitokiri
04-23-2009 at 10:57 AM.
04-23-2009 at 10:57 AM.
*DELETED*

I don't have the patience for this argument today. nod
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Fallacy
04-23-2009 at 10:58 AM.
04-23-2009 at 10:58 AM.
Popcorn
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GoHalos
04-23-2009 at 10:59 AM.
04-23-2009 at 10:59 AM.
Quote from Hitokiri :
How is it a fact? Because you believe something to be true doesn't make it a "fact" so the last point still stands, threatening someone with something that they already do not believe in doesn't sway them to your side of the argument.
Just because they do not believe something doesn't mean it isn't a fact.
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Fallacy
04-23-2009 at 10:59 AM.
04-23-2009 at 10:59 AM.
Quote from GoHalos :
Just because they do not believe something doesn't mean it isn't a fact.
I believe that the earth is flat, is it a fact?
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Hitokiri
04-23-2009 at 11:00 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:00 AM.
Quote from GoHalos :
Just because they do not believe something doesn't mean it isn't a fact.
Like I said, I do not have the patience to argue this today so I'm leaving it alone, have a super awesome day. Smilie
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04-23-2009 at 11:01 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:01 AM.
Quote from Hitokiri :
Like I said, I do not have the patience to argue this today so I'm leaving it alone, have a super awesome day. Smilie
And god bless!
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Hitokiri
04-23-2009 at 11:02 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:02 AM.
Quote from IVIax :
And god bless!
IT BURNSSSSSESSS US !!!!! (golem *cough* golem) Sadwalk
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GoHalos
04-23-2009 at 11:02 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:02 AM.
Quote from IVIax :
I believe that the earth is flat, is it a fact?
Is it a fact that you believe the earth is flat? If you aren't lying that you believe it, then it's a fact that you believe the earth is flat.

Does it mean you're going to heaven or hell? Makes no difference what you believe about the earth being flat, round, oval or whatever.

The fact is that it was made by God though.
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04-23-2009 at 11:05 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:05 AM.
Quote from GoHalos :
Is it a fact that you believe the earth is flat? If you aren't lying that you believe it, then it's a fact that you believe the earth is flat.

Does it mean you're going to heaven or hell? Makes no difference what you believe about the earth being flat, round, oval or whatever.

The fact is that it was made by God though.
How is that a fact? Is it in a book written by man 1,000,0000,0000,0000000000000.000 years ago? That man is dead now and laughing his ass off at you.

That's not a fact though. There are a ton of scientific explanations for the creation of earth.

There's also no fact that there exists a heaven or hell. Have you been there? Can you prove it exists? nope, it's called faith


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GoHalos
04-23-2009 at 11:23 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:23 AM.
Quote from IVIax :
How is that a fact? Is it in a book written by man 1,000,0000,0000,0000000000000.000 years ago? That man is dead now and laughing his ass off at you.

That's not a fact though. There are a ton of scientific explanations for the creation of earth.

There's also no fact that there exists a heaven or hell. Have you been there? Can you prove it exists? nope, it's called faith


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If he's laughing, then I guess he isn't dead and I know of no humans that are that old today.

I know I won't be going to hell and if you don't know you're going to heaven there is a good reason and that is because you aren't and if you aren't then you're going to hell.

I would say, God have mercy on your soul, but he won't and that is a choice that is totally up to you. You cannot blame God for your going to hell because He made you with the ability to choose.
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iconian | Staff
04-23-2009 at 11:30 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:30 AM.
Quote from GoHalos :
If he's laughing, then I guess he isn't dead and I know of no humans that are that old today.

I know I won't be going to hell and if you don't know you're going to heaven there is a good reason and that is because you aren't and if you aren't then you're going to hell.
I would say, God have mercy on your soul, but he won't and that is a choice that is totally up to you. You cannot blame God for your going to hell because He made you with the ability to choose.
oh god, another one...
vomit

read this sign: HEAVEN IS ON STRIKE, SEE U IN HELL
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Last edited by iconian | Staff April 23, 2009 at 11:36 AM.
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04-23-2009 at 11:33 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:33 AM.
Quote from GoHalos :
If he's laughing, then I guess he isn't dead and I know of no humans that are that old today.

I know I won't be going to hell and if you don't know you're going to heaven there is a good reason and that is because you aren't and if you aren't then you're going to hell.

I would say, God have mercy on your soul, but he won't and that is a choice that is totally up to you. You cannot blame God for your going to hell because He made you with the ability to choose.
I love that logic laugh out loud
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TigerStar
04-23-2009 at 11:42 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:42 AM.
Please explain this. God gave man freewill. Why? If we were just his little experiment, why give us something that will fail so many of us. If he truly loved all, then why not not give us all free will so that we know better than to believe and love him? If he is omnipotent, then he knew what the effect of giving us free will was going to be. So if he knew, they ultimately it was his decision for anyone not going to heaven.
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jenni.
04-23-2009 at 11:50 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:50 AM.
Do you want to make people love you, or do you want them to love you on their own? Same thing. God is awesome, and I've seen many, many things that can't be explained any other way than God. I have faith. I have most of my life, and I always will. If I believe in God, what does it hurt any of you? None. IF I were ever wrong, then what does it hurt to live my life the way I think God would want me to? It doesn't.

I don't really care if you believe in God or not. I am the same person to you whether you do or don't. It makes me no difference whatsoever, but I am really sick and tired of people making fun of people that do around here. It's really REALLY old.

After this post I am putting this thread on ignore because it really upsets me when people start this crap, so if you reply being a smartass then I won't see it.
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04-23-2009 at 11:53 AM.
04-23-2009 at 11:53 AM.
Quote from jenni. :
I don't really care if you believe in God or not. I am the same person to you whether you do or don't. It makes me no difference whatsoever, but I am really sick and tired of people making fun of people that do around here. It's really REALLY old.
There's a difference between you and the bible thumper above (not the OP). You're not pushing your believes onto other people, that's the only reason people are making fun of him.
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