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Forum Thread

How do I get pale again?

10,633 2,427 June 9, 2012 at 01:07 PM in Sad
Ok, so summer has started and I have been playing lots more tennis, I mean lots, avg. 10+ hours a week, and even using sunblock I have went up a good 5 shades, I am Chinese suppose to be lighter/light skin, yellow if you wanna say, now I look dark as some of the Hispanic people out there. Anything I can do? My parents get md at me for this b/c they say girls won't like me as I am so dark and stuff, and they always tell me to not play tennis although I do anyway. Anyway, any advice how to reverse this?

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Joined Apr 2010
L99: Potato
> bubble2 3,582 Posts
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Majide
06-11-2012 at 11:11 AM.
06-11-2012 at 11:11 AM.
I can't see your photo, it is blocked, but I don't really care.
Quote from Muchky :
Dark chinese guys are hot!

Don't let anyone else tell you how to dress or look as long as you are happy with yourself Smilie
Iagree My man is usually pretty white, but when he's darker it looks very nice. Girly Though he's not exactly Chinese... I don't think it matters though.

As long as you aren't getting dark in an unhealthy way, you'll be fine.


I want to add that I've heard that using an spf higher than 30 is kinda useless. I am always very pale, and would use spf 70+, but I recently gave up and started using 30, and have been fine. The main thing to remember is to reapply.
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Joined Jun 2006
Jambi-rific in Seattle!
> bubble2 31,436 Posts
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Zoe Moon
06-11-2012 at 11:12 AM.
06-11-2012 at 11:12 AM.
Quote from MissyMooMoo :
Why would you assume that he is not comfortable with his race because he said white instead of pale? Maybe English is his second language and he didn't think about saying 'pale'. Dontknow
I've read a lot of the OP's posts since he started hanging out in the lounge and don't think that's the issue.

I said he was uncomfortable about his race due to his parents wanting him to be paler and making it an issue with him. Parents can really screw with a child's head.
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Joined Jun 2005
Live Like No One Else
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stealth
06-11-2012 at 11:15 AM.
06-11-2012 at 11:15 AM.
Stay indoors and away from the windows! nod

Hide
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Joined Dec 2005
My # is bigger than yours
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SnakePlisken
06-11-2012 at 11:19 AM.
06-11-2012 at 11:19 AM.
get your penis shortened?
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Joined Feb 2009
Tryin to come originale
> bubble2 5,974 Posts
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tresanus
06-11-2012 at 11:36 AM.
06-11-2012 at 11:36 AM.
Quote from Maleficent :
Your parents are mad at you because they think girls won't like you because you got a tan? That has to be one of the most obnoxious and superficial things I've ever heard.
Very common in asian cultures. Those who are tan are those who work outside (aka poor class).
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Joined Sep 2009
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Curtieson
06-11-2012 at 11:39 AM.
06-11-2012 at 11:39 AM.
Quote from damsel. :
My proudest accomplishment while in Florida is that I never got sunburned because I was so diligent about sunblock. Beat that, sun! Flex
I saw this and had to share...so...into this random thread where you posted it goes!



They are Labatt caps.
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Joined Oct 2007
No.
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damsel.
06-11-2012 at 01:45 PM.
06-11-2012 at 01:45 PM.
Quote from Curtieson :
I saw this and had to share...so...into this random thread where you posted it goes!



They are Labatt caps.
Wow, that's awesome!
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Joined Oct 2005
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livinglife
06-11-2012 at 02:31 PM.
06-11-2012 at 02:31 PM.
Your parents sound ridiculous to me. They dislike the fact you are tan, really, that's like telling a kid if they don't like ice cream they aren't their kid anymore. Take my advice, stop listening to your clueless parents and act like an adult. There is nothing wrong with being tan. And if the girls you are dating don't like your tan, then they are very superficial girls and they aren't worth dating at all.
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Joined Jan 2007
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Maleficent
06-11-2012 at 02:50 PM.
06-11-2012 at 02:50 PM.
Quote from tresanus :
Very common in asian cultures. Those who are tan are those who work outside (aka poor class).
So in other words, they're like a century or two behind us in culture. Is being fat also valued? (Meaning you can buy enough to eat and aren't starving!)
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Joined Oct 2007
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jaded.echo
06-11-2012 at 03:08 PM.
06-11-2012 at 03:08 PM.
Quote from teenbean :
Wear a higher SPF.
Don't play during peak sun hours (10 am - 4pm)
Find an indoor court.
Higher SPF and reapply reapply every 90 mins. Set a timer.

I am an Asian girl and dark guys aren't unattractive. Who cares about the shade of skin.

But I just worry about skin cancer.
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Joined Aug 2008
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MoveOutdaWay
06-11-2012 at 03:17 PM.
06-11-2012 at 03:17 PM.
You will not get any chicks without that tan. Do yourself a favor and hit the beach to get rid of those tan lines. Would help if you remind your parents that we're in the 21st century.
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Joined Oct 2007
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jaded.echo
06-11-2012 at 04:16 PM.
06-11-2012 at 04:16 PM.
Quote from livinglife :
Your parents sound ridiculous to me. They dislike the fact you are tan, really, that's like telling a kid if they don't like ice cream they aren't their kid anymore. Take my advice, stop listening to your clueless parents and act like an adult. There is nothing wrong with being tan. And if the girls you are dating don't like your tan, then they are very superficial girls and they aren't worth dating at all.
Quote from Maleficent :
So in other words, they're like a century or two behind us in culture. Is being fat also valued? (Meaning you can buy enough to eat and aren't starving!)
Quote from Zoe Moon :
The thread title is rather interesting. Most people would say, 'How do I get pale again?' Sounds like you're not quite comfortable with your race, which is understandable given your parents take on skin color. I have a friend from India who lives in the states and when her parents came over to visit her they fussed about her tan and told her to stay out of the sun because she was getting dark and Indian guys wouldn't like that. Just be you, do what you're comfortable with. The right girl will like you for who you are inside, not what shade you are. Smilie
Why must you all be judgmental on our culture and the people who still believe in our culture?

livinglife, OP's parents never said they'll disown him bc he's became dark. You are jumping to extreme conclusions. The way that Asian parents do that is more like advice. Very much like how some other parents would advice their kids not to gain weight or not to dress like goths or not to have certain radical haircuts or not to have tattoos. Or like people telling OP "you can't get a girl unless you're tan".

Every culture have social norms that are held about physical looks. Just bc it's different from the American social norms doesn't make his parents bad people. Every person holds a different opinion on what's acceptable for physically appearance, and culture has a lot of influence on these opinions. You may not believe that skin color matter to the appearance of a person but I'm sure there are some other factors of physical appearance that you deem unacceptable.

Zoe moon, OP's parents Asian belief that pale is better doesn't have to do with race. Don't jump to conclusions. You have to understand the cultural history behind that belief. It's based on class, not race. ALSO, OP said white bc in direct translation from Chinese, the word we use for pale skin color is white. We have a word for pale but you don't use it in reference to skin color. It's just a different language. No matter how fluent we are in English, the Chinese language will have a little effect on our English.

The Americas are some of the few places where the history of its people who stem from different continents and cultures all over the world struggled to coexist together and in the process racial tension became a prominent issue in our country, the US.

That's not so in other countries. For example, in China, there were not much outside nationalities living in our land in our history (LOL, yes, I say "our" also since I am Chinese-American) to have made an influence in the whole culture's belief that the white/pale color is better bc Caucasion people are white. You see, it doesn't even make sense right? Why would the Chinese based their long-held "pale/white" belief off the the Caucasian "white supremacy" belief when the Chinese aren't even Caucasian themselves, and in the past 5000+ years, most Chinese living in China had never even knew the existence of other "colors" of people? If the Chinese belief was linked to the "white supremacy" theory, the Chinese culture would had committed self-hate for hundreds of years.

The Chinese "white/pale" belief was simply based off class structure. The rich never had to do intensive outdoors labor and the poor had to. That was the reason that most cultures in the world's past history held the "white/pale" belief, even the European royalties who powdered their faces hundreds of years ago.
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Last edited by jaydid.echo June 11, 2012 at 06:42 PM.
Joined Oct 2007
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jaded.echo
06-11-2012 at 04:20 PM.
06-11-2012 at 04:20 PM.
Now, after that history lesson on Chinese culture, please don't hate on OP's parents. They're just from another culture. It's actually pretty disrespectful to judge people from another culture bc their cultural norms are different from yours.

With that said, I understand OP and I live in a world where 2 cultures are mixed and we have to learn to balance both cultures in our lives.

Basically, everyone's advice on being comfortable with yourself is a good thing. Develop your own self-confidence. Don't let either cultural norms determine how you view yourself. Just be healthy and you're good. Just as much as you don't need to be white/pale, you also don't have to be buff and slim in order to be a valuable human being.

P.S. In case, you can't tell. I argue for the acceptance of people with different cultural believes, but I don't hold the Chinese pale/white belief myself. Like I said, who cares about what shade of skin color you are.
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Last edited by jaydid.echo June 11, 2012 at 07:21 PM.
Joined Oct 2007
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damsel.
06-11-2012 at 04:23 PM.
06-11-2012 at 04:23 PM.
Quote from jaydid.echo :
Why must you all be judgmental on our culture and the people who still believe in our culture?

livinglife, OP's parents never said they'll disowning him bc he's became dark. You are jumping to extreme conclusions. The way that Asian parents do that is more like advice. Very much like how some other parents would advice their kids not to gain weight or not to dress like goths or not to have certain radical haircuts or not to have tattoos.

Every culture have social norms that are held about physical looks. Just bc it's different from the American social norms doesn't make his parents bad people. Every person holds a different opinion on what's acceptable for physically appearance, and culture has a lot of influence on these opinions. You may not believe that skin color matter to the appearance of a person but I'm sure there are some other factors about physical appearance that you deem unacceptable.

Zoe moon, OP's parents Asian belief that pale is better doesn't have to do with race. Don't jump to conclusions. You have to understand the cultural history behind that belief. It's based on class, not race. ALSO, OP said white bc in direct translation from Chinese, the word we use for pale skin color is white. We have a word for pale but you don't use it in reference to skin color. It's just a different language. No matter how fluent we are in English, the Chinese language will have a little effect on our English.

The Americas are some of the few places where the history of its people, who stem from different continents and cultures all over the world, struggled to coexist together and in the process racial tension became a prominent issue in our country, the US.

That's not so in other countries. For example, in China, there were not much outside nationalities living in our land in our history (LOL, yes, I say "our" also since I am Chinese-American) to have made an influence in the whole culture's belief that the white/pale color is better bc Caucasion people are white. You see, it doesn't even make sense right? Why would the Chinese based their long-held "pale/white" belief off the the Caucasian "white supremacy" belief when the Chinese aren't even Caucasian themselves, and in the past 5000+ years, most Chinese living in China had never even knew the existence of other "colors" of people? If the Chinese belief was linked to the "white supremacy" theory, the Chinese culture would had committed self-hate for hundreds of years.

The Chinese "white/pale" belief was simply based of class structure. The rich never had to do intensive outdoors labor and the poor had to. That was the reason that most cultures in the world's past history held the "white/pale" belief, even the European royalties who powdered their faces hundreds of years ago.
Quote from jaydid.echo :
Now, after that history lesson on Chinese culture. Please don't hate on OP's parents. They're just from another culture. It's actually pretty disrespectful to say you dislike people from another culture bc their cultural norms are different from yours.

With that said, I understand OP and I live in a world where 2 cultures are mixed and we have to learned to balance both cultures in our lives.

Basically, everyone's advice on being comfortable with yourself is a good thing. Develop your own self-confidence. Don't let either cultural norms determine how you view yourself. Just be healthy and you're good. Just as much as you don't need to be white/pale, you also don't have to believe you have to be buff and slim in order to be a valuable human being.
Well said.
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Joined Dec 2011
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> bubble2 48 Posts
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kaybe
06-11-2012 at 05:23 PM.
06-11-2012 at 05:23 PM.
My issue is I am very pale, no matter how much sunlight I get and how tanned I get after summer. I will get pale again after 2 months or so. My parents tells me to get more tanned. Girls don't like guys too pale. lolol Complete opposite to OP's situation for this thread! Asian parents too by the way. So not all asian parent have same type of judgement on their kids.
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