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My 4yr old was left at his dad's home w/ a 10 and 8 yr old...what do I do?

1,230 2,939 February 18, 2013 at 08:39 PM in Babies & Kids (2)
sorry people. I never venture into the Lounge, but I figured this was worth the question. My son is four and his dad and I have been split up/divorced for 3 yrs+. we have split custody and trade off every other week. we live in TX.

My son told me that he was left at home with the other two boys that live in his home that are 10 and 8 (ex lives with his GF and her 2 kids)

I am thinking of getting a lawyer and taking him to court for child endangerment.

I can understand maybe a 13+ yr old watching some other kid but not 10 and 8. They have no knowledge of CPR, first aid, calling 911 in a panic, fire danger, not answering the front door.

Any thoughts, suggestions? I am kind of scared of turning his dad in, as to what can happen on the weeks I dont have him, but I feel helpless putting my son in that situation.

I called my ex and he admitted they left them but "only for a few mins, and it wasnt my concern on the weeks that arent mine"

(please excuse the typing as my s and w key are busted, so I have to cut and paste. )

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Joined Jan 2004
Here's to the future
> bubble2 25,141 Posts
707 Reputation
Iaaaiws
02-20-2013 at 02:22 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:22 PM.
Quote from Frogstar :
Hey, I post in there.

I guess that may not help my case Ermm
Quote from Maleficent :
Yeah. And I used to post in there. Case is looking pretty thin. laugh out loud
Not me. Nono2

I tend to keep my political views to myself.




















Rofl2
Reply
Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
2,134 Reputation
Frogstar
02-20-2013 at 02:26 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:26 PM.
Well played, bunny Bluesbrother
Reply
Joined Oct 2009
L∞: Pro Bono
> bubble2 11,184 Posts
48,856 Reputation
calistyle
02-20-2013 at 02:33 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:33 PM.
Quote from IPT :
High Five


hug
funny thing being i have no clue who cali is =)
I'm cali.
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Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
2,134 Reputation
Frogstar
02-20-2013 at 02:36 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:36 PM.
Zed's dead, baby.
Reply
Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
8,433 Reputation
Maleficent
02-20-2013 at 02:39 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:39 PM.
Quote from Frogstar :
Okay, he's one of the people that posts in there that isn't a raving lunatic.
I can stand by that statement.
I rarely rave.
That sounds good. laugh out loud

Quote from Iaaaiws :
Not me. Nono2

I tend to keep my political views to myself.

Rofl2
LMAO
Reply
Joined Sep 2007
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 24,000 Posts
2,237 Reputation
Kolto
02-20-2013 at 02:50 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:50 PM.
Quote from Frogstar :
Okay, he's one of the people that posts in there that isn't a raving lunatic.
I can stand by that statement.
I rarely rave.
maybe i should become a raving lunatic Whee

Quote from Maleficent :
Yeah. And I used to post in there. Case is looking pretty thin. laugh out loud
you should come back, NM 156 makes it entertaining to watch a train wreck
Reply
Last edited by Kolto February 20, 2013 at 02:50 PM.
Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
2,134 Reputation
Frogstar
02-20-2013 at 02:51 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:51 PM.
Quote from IPT :
maybe i should become a raving lunatic Whee
What's the worst that could happen?
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Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
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Maleficent
02-20-2013 at 02:56 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:56 PM.
Quote from IPT :
maybe i should become a raving lunatic Whee


you should come back, NM 156 makes it entertaining to watch a train wreck
laugh out loud

That's okay, I'll pass. Same people, same arguments, same partisan bullshit. I've had more than enough for one lifetime.

Quote from Frogstar :
What's the worst that could happen?
He'd become an official member of the lounge?
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Joined Sep 2007
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 24,000 Posts
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Kolto
02-20-2013 at 02:56 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:56 PM.
Quote from Maleficent :
He'd become an official member of the lounge?
never!
apparently im too mean to be a regular on the lounge.
I'd point you to the thread in which i chased a regular lounger out of the GL, but it was deleted
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Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
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Frogstar
02-20-2013 at 02:58 PM.
02-20-2013 at 02:58 PM.
I'm pretty sure it was nessy, too Turtle
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Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
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Maleficent
02-20-2013 at 03:02 PM.
02-20-2013 at 03:02 PM.
Quote from IPT :
never!
apparently im too mean to be a regular on the lounge.
I'd point you to the thread in which i chased a regular lounger out of the GL, but it was deleted
Roll

You can't be too mean to be a regular in the lounge. Seriously. Have you seen some of the regulars here? laugh out loud
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Joined Oct 2007
2 tickets to the gun show
> bubble2 15,429 Posts
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Deusxmachina
02-20-2013 at 03:07 PM.
02-20-2013 at 03:07 PM.
Quote from Maleficent :
Roll

You can't be too mean to be a regular in the lounge. Seriously. Have you seen some of the regulars here? laugh out loud
That's true. The Lounge has more meanness and cattiness than The Podium does.
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Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
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Maleficent
02-20-2013 at 03:09 PM.
02-20-2013 at 03:09 PM.
Quote from Deusxmachina :
That's true. The Lounge has more meanness and cattiness than The Podium does.
Oh I disagree about that. The podium is way worse. The lounge is just more open about it, because we don't get warnings here for it. laugh out loud
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Joined May 2008
L6: Expert
> bubble2 1,445 Posts
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jj.12321
02-20-2013 at 03:33 PM.
02-20-2013 at 03:33 PM.
Quote from aemcgee :
I didnt come here to be made fun of or criticized. I came for support and suggestions. Thank you to those that actually did help and now I will go back to the threads in sd that are actually practical.
I will give you some practical advice. (I stopped reading the thread at this point).

How long was your son left alone? Your ex claims "a few minutes". If it is maybe 20 minutes or less, I think that's pretty reasonable. If it was 10 hours, then yea, you have a legit gripe.. All the area inbetween is kind of a grey area.

A lot depends on the 8 and 10 year old kids too.

But honestly, people have 16 year old babysitters that don't know CPR. Heck, most parents don't know CPR. I guess I don't see that as an issue. I'm guessing a 10 year old knows how to call 911.

It's probably too late for this, but a calm discussion with your ex would've been nice.. Like ask him if Billy the 10 year old knows how to call 911, etc.

Calling the law isn't likely to help. In our state, you have to pretty much prove that the child was in danger, which is pretty difficult unless something bad happens (I have checked on this with several policemen in our state).. The law doesn't want to go around arresting parents if no one is hurt, and they don't want to dictate where the grey area is.

So.. I would wait a few days, let both of you cool off, and try to talk calmly about it. Keep in mind, you're not really in a position to force him to do anything.. I can relate to what you are going through though.. I'm not heartless, just trying to explain the reality of the situation. It's nice you care about your kids' safety.

Second piece of advice.. If you post something on the lounge, you are lucky to get 2 or 3 helpful replies. You will have to wade through about 100 stupid posts to get to those few helpful replies. This is normalcy here. Good luck with everything.
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Joined Aug 2009
Zombie exterminator
> bubble2 2,851 Posts
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Beartrkkr
02-20-2013 at 03:40 PM.
02-20-2013 at 03:40 PM.
Quote from jj.12321 :
I will give you some practical advice. (I stopped reading the thread at this point).
........

Second piece of advice.. If you post something on the lounge, you are lucky to get 2 or 3 helpful replies. You will have to wade through about 100 stupid posts to get to those few helpful replies. This is normalcy here. Good luck with everything.
If you get 2 or 3 helpfuls posts, count yourself as blessed.
Reply
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