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ForeverDecember's new thread. Applications and Candidates.

11,996 1,332 April 16, 2013 at 12:35 PM in Humor
So I don't work at the hospital anymore since I moved across the country, but now I work for an employment agency. I go over a ton of applications among other things and sometimes silly things come up. Since people like CowgirlMechanic seemed to enjoy my last thread, hopefully you will like the new one.


So let's begin:

On an application today (at a friend's office):
How did you hear about *company I work for*?: Threw a friend

Community Wiki

Last Edited by ForeverDecember May 7, 2013 at 02:22 PM
Interview tip #1: Don't use your resume as an umbrella when it rains

Interview tip #2: Jeans and a lime green tank top are not interview attire.

Interview tip #3: Asking for the receptionist's number while you are waiting for an interview isn't the best first impression.

Interview tip #4: Spell check your resume. For the love of sheep, spell check your resume.

Interview tip #5: Don't eat part of the styrofoam water cup while filling out your application and then leave it on the table with bite marks and nibbles taken out of it. That is just weird and frankly pretty gross.

Interview tip #6: Extreme and blatant racism and sexism will not get you a job (at least here). If I had it my way, I'd tell you to fark off but I have to be polite.

Interview tip #7: Constant, loud sighs when I give you some paperwork to do is not a good sign. If you are annoyed or think it is too much to ask to fill out an application, what can I expect from you on a job?

Interview tip #8: It says on your social security card to not laminate it. Please stop laminating them. That includes wrapping it in scotch tape. They are actually invalid when you do that.

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Joined Jul 2003
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> bubble2 35,473 Posts
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DC
04-30-2013 at 09:08 AM.
04-30-2013 at 09:08 AM.
Quote from ForeverDecember :
I started some interview tips in the wiki from experiences I've had here Whee
Asking for the receptionist's number while you are waiting for an interview isn't the best first impression.


She was hot!

How You Do'in?
nod
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Joined May 2006
Suspected porn star
> bubble2 11,996 Posts
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Original Poster
ForeverDecember
05-02-2013 at 10:03 AM.
05-02-2013 at 10:03 AM.
Rant time:


There are three things that probably annoy me the most in a day and they happen all day every day.
1) People who call and the conversation goes this way:
Me: "Good morning, thank you for calling *my company*, this is FD, how can I help you?"
Them: "uh... hello? uh... who is this? I had call. Someone call me."
Me: "Do you have a name so I know who to transfer you to?"
Them: "Uh..... uh... no, they just call me and I call back. What's this number? Who this?"
Me: "This is *my company*, did they leave you a voicemail so I know who to tranfer you to?" (I don't have a list of who people call)
Them: *** either they ask again who this is, mumble something, or hang up***

2) People who come in the office and then ask me if this is *my company* when there is not one, not two, but THREE signs outside my door that have the company name on them.

3) People who get told on the phone and in an email to bring their resume and IDs for the I9 and then don't bring either, after coming in late already, and then cop an attitude because they can't fill out the application.
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Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
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Frogstar
05-02-2013 at 10:38 AM.
05-02-2013 at 10:38 AM.
I'm sorry, were you not aware that you're responsible for their shortcomings?


Hide
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Joined Jun 2006
Jambi-rific in Seattle!
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Zoe Moon
05-02-2013 at 10:49 AM.
05-02-2013 at 10:49 AM.
Quote from ForeverDecember :
Rant time:


There are three things that probably annoy me the most in a day and they happen all day every day.
1) People who call and the conversation goes this way:
Me: "Good morning, thank you for calling *my company*, this is FD, how can I help you?"
Them: "uh... hello? uh... who is this? I had call. Someone call me."
Me: "Do you have a name so I know who to transfer you to?"
Them: "Uh..... uh... no, they just call me and I call back. What's this number? Who this?"
Me: "This is *my company*, did they leave you a voicemail so I know who to tranfer you to?" (I don't have a list of who people call)
Them: *** either they ask again who this is, mumble something, or hang up***

2) People who come in the office and then ask me if this is *my company* when there is not one, not two, but THREE signs outside my door that have the company name on them.

3) People who get told on the phone and in an email to bring their resume and IDs for the I9 and then don't bring either, after coming in late already, and then cop an attitude because they can't fill out the application.
Is this a business that caters mainly to new immigrants?
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Joined May 2006
Suspected porn star
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Original Poster
ForeverDecember
05-02-2013 at 11:23 AM.
05-02-2013 at 11:23 AM.
Quote from Zoe Moon :
Is this a business that caters mainly to new immigrants?
Nope. Just a staffing agency.


When you get a call from a number you don't know, do you just call it right back? Why do people do that?

Quote from Frogstar :
I'm sorry, were you not aware that you're responsible for their shortcomings?


Hide
Facepalm I forgot!!!
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Last edited by ForeverDecember May 2, 2013 at 11:23 AM.
Joined May 2006
Suspected porn star
> bubble2 11,996 Posts
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Original Poster
ForeverDecember
05-07-2013 at 02:21 PM.
05-07-2013 at 02:21 PM.
Added three new tips to the wiki:

Interview tip #6: Extreme and blatant racism and sexism will not get you a job (at least here). If I had it my way, I'd tell you to fark off but I have to be polite.

Interview tip #7: Constant, loud sighs when I give you some paperwork to do is not a good sign. If you are annoyed or think it is too much to ask to fill out an application, what can I expect from you on a job?

Interview tip #8: It says on your social security card to not laminate it. Please stop laminating them. That includes wrapping it in scotch tape. They are actually invalid when you do that.
Reply
Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
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Frogstar
05-07-2013 at 02:24 PM.
05-07-2013 at 02:24 PM.
I have a plastic sleeve I put my SS card in.
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Joined Jun 2008
Life = YMMV
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teenbean
05-07-2013 at 05:30 PM.
05-07-2013 at 05:30 PM.
I have no idea where my SS card is. I haven't needed it in a very long time.
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Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
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Frogstar
05-07-2013 at 05:31 PM.
05-07-2013 at 05:31 PM.
I needed mine when I refinanced my house last month Turtle
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Joined May 2006
Suspected porn star
> bubble2 11,996 Posts
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Original Poster
ForeverDecember
05-07-2013 at 08:02 PM.
05-07-2013 at 08:02 PM.
Just don't go all DIY with the scotch tape!

I wish so bad I could write what happened with the racism thing but I better not. It was bad though. Really bad. One of the most uncomfortable moments of my life.
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Joined Oct 2009
Shop smart. Shop S-Mart!
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ashcampbell
05-07-2013 at 09:04 PM.
05-07-2013 at 09:04 PM.
Quote from teenbean :
I have no idea where my SS card is. I haven't needed it in a very long time.
Quote from Frogstar :
I needed mine when I refinanced my house last month Turtle
passport FTW motherphucers!
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Joined May 2006
Suspected porn star
> bubble2 11,996 Posts
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Original Poster
ForeverDecember
05-08-2013 at 04:29 PM.
05-08-2013 at 04:29 PM.
This one I thought was funny. Remember that scene in Bruce Almighty when he makes the new anchor say "I doa, da cha cha" ? I read this in a similar fashion. To be totally fair, English is not this person's first language.

From a resume today:
"sort all yahoo mail and segregate in mail room before do the deliver in each bid. And deliver all mail and packages in yahoo employee, pick up all outgoing mail in particular time on daily basis. And assist yahoo employee how to ship packages and mail and do the customer care."


Now everyone, do the customer care! Dance13
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Joined May 2006
Suspected porn star
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Original Poster
ForeverDecember
05-09-2013 at 08:42 AM.
05-09-2013 at 08:42 AM.
"To work hard and gain experience in any position and to progress as quickly as possible. Also, to make myself useful as possible to the company by any means necessary."


"any means necessary" Bigeye
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Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
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Frogstar
05-09-2013 at 08:43 AM.
05-09-2013 at 08:43 AM.
Did they list "dechroming trailer hitches" under skills?
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Joined Dec 2005
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SnakePlisken
05-09-2013 at 08:47 AM.
05-09-2013 at 08:47 AM.
my bmw x5 ain't got no trailer hitches?
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