RETIRED: Target Chit Chat

I think someone should FedEx me some meat!

I told my husband I am only willing to move if it brings me closer to a Super Target.

So anyway... Instead of MEAT, I had cheesecake tonight from the Rainbow Room in NYC, my father-in-law works there, and brought us home a whole cheesecake... So, guess how much crazy rich people are willing to pay for a SLICE of cheesecake?? $26...per slice... Only in America I will say, it was damn good, but seriously? $26?? I don't think so.

I just received this in an email and thought I'd share it with ya'll. This is why I prefer to shop alone...


After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Gilbert
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Gilbert are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras .

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4 July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through yelled, 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed, 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least...

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'


Sincerely,
Wal-Mart

Okay...so not only are they talking about MEAT in the regular T thread...but now there is a lot of chatter about PANTENE!!! (Yes, the "P" word!!)

Did it taste better than a 6 dollar slice?

Doesn't this restaurant also have the most expensive dessert on any menu? It is a sundae with the world's finest chocolate, edible gold leaf and truffles. Maybe I am thinking of another joint but the name rings a bell.

I just received this in an email and thought I'd share it with ya'll. This is why I prefer to shop alone...


After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Gilbert
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Gilbert are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras .

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4 July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away.'

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through yelled, 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed, 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'
And last, but not least...

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'


Sincerely,
Wal-Mart

A co-worker used to make desserts and sell to restaurants part-time. So every night she was baking something delicious. Her specialty and the thing she sold the most of was her cheesecakes. To.Die.For.Good. If the top of one cracked during baking, she would not sell it to the restaurants, so she would bring them in to work. Is it bad that I used to for her cheesecakes to crack?

A co-worker used to make desserts and sell to restaurants part-time. So every night she was baking something delicious. Her specialty and the thing she sold the most of was her cheesecakes. To.Die.For.Good. If the top of one cracked during baking, she would not sell it to the restaurants, so she would bring them in to work. Is it bad that I used to for her cheesecakes to crack?

He says they have to charge that (or $8 for a baked potato) because the pay 8 million a year in rent. So you're paying for one of the best views in the city.

This brought tears to my eyes. I know I've read it before but it gets me every time!! I would love to do some of these myself!!! LOL!!! Hysterical!!! Might do the condom thing tonight - I've definately already done the Madonna thing. Who hasn't??

I could go for a cracked cheesecake right about now

Along that line, was anyone else worried they would bump into someone at T during the durex days? I used to bury them in my cart, just in case !

Along that line, was anyone else worried they would bump into someone at T during the durex days? I used to bury them in my cart, just in case

For those of you with Longs Drugs and no CVSs, did you know that all of the Longs were becoming CVSs? I.did.not.know.that!

Read more here [longs.com]!

Hi everyone

Question and favor - do any of you have stockpiles of the Benefiber "sticks" (similar to Crystal Light packets) from the Wags money maker last year that you don't have any idea what you're going to use them for? I will pay for shipping to me if you do!

Thanks in advance for anyone that can help out - and if you can't, no worries, I you anyway!!

dpags-what insert is that q from?