Joined Jun 2007
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Forum Thread
I'm so pissed at DBF anyone care to give insight as to a man's thinking?
December 16, 2009 at
07:18 AM
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Background info:
In March,before we were officially dating,I found naked pictures of this girl on his phone. I got incredibly pissed and confronted him about them. He said we weren't officially dating although we were exclusive so I couldn't get mad at him bc I didn't know what I wanted to do. Fast forward until now, he's been still talking to her and texting her,I've known it all along and I've expressed to him how much I don't like him talking to her etc. He always brings back the part that we weren't "dating" when she sent the pics,and since we've been dating she hasn't sent him any racy pics. I've been trying to be patient and understanding about it but I'm really insecure about this whole situation and I've told him how I feel,but it still does no good. Am I acting irrationally? Do I have a reason to be upset about him still talking to her etc? She's on his facebook and they chit chat alot,but yet he asked me to remove my ex because he didn't like it,and I did because I didn't want him to feel threatened or insecure about it. It gets to the point that when I see her posting in response to him that I clinch my fists because it makes me so mad.
In March,before we were officially dating,I found naked pictures of this girl on his phone. I got incredibly pissed and confronted him about them. He said we weren't officially dating although we were exclusive so I couldn't get mad at him bc I didn't know what I wanted to do. Fast forward until now, he's been still talking to her and texting her,I've known it all along and I've expressed to him how much I don't like him talking to her etc. He always brings back the part that we weren't "dating" when she sent the pics,and since we've been dating she hasn't sent him any racy pics. I've been trying to be patient and understanding about it but I'm really insecure about this whole situation and I've told him how I feel,but it still does no good. Am I acting irrationally? Do I have a reason to be upset about him still talking to her etc? She's on his facebook and they chit chat alot,but yet he asked me to remove my ex because he didn't like it,and I did because I didn't want him to feel threatened or insecure about it. It gets to the point that when I see her posting in response to him that I clinch my fists because it makes me so mad.
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Oh wait
Without going all psycho-crazy on him, as women are apt to do, come up with a way to make him choose: you or her. Simple to say, harder to do. As long as she's around, she will be a threat. Period. You will get into arguments or he'll go out drinking with friends and somewhere along the way there will need to be an apology from him for doing something with her inappropriate.
Does he value a long-term relationship with you over his history with this girl and/or the secret rush guys get from conversing with women of opportunity.
Sadly, there is a good chance that if you push for such a decision, he'll run and I think you know that. That's why I think you're posting on here.
Women are evil. EVIL!
... btw (insert name), that latest pic looks fantastic and I think your SO will love what little you're wearing and yes, Iconian would think those shoes look fab on you.
But.... when it comes down to it you have to look at two things:
* He password protected his phone and won't break contact with someone he calls a "friend" who also sent him nekkid pics. Ummmm.... what? So when he or you breaks up, he can say "Well, you knew about her all along. What did you think? That we were "just friends"?"
* You have a child. What if your child was dating someone like this? What advice would *you* give them??? Would you be happy for them? Or would be advising them that they need to move on?
Don't let him drop the issue. And if he won't come to a resolution with you on another woman, then how are you ever going to make even MORE important decisions with this person in the future???
ETA: and I agree with whomever posted about your ex crushing on you when he was reminising ... oh yea.... if he is the ex that was not nice to you, then he is probably just trying to "rope you in" again.... so your decision on that one....
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I'm not gonna drop the issue because I feel this is what he wants.If we can't make it through this then we are doomed,better to know that now instead of later though.
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Whatever you decide, I hope you are happy!
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