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Forum Thread

I'm getting a Vasectomy next week!!

3,704 4,318 August 18, 2011 at 11:13 AM in Question
Limited OT, please.

Okay.......I'm getting snipped. EEK!

My GF's okay with it, but I'm kinda concerned how I break it to my little rich and cranky Grammy that the line will now end with me. I'm 40 and she still thinks any minute I'm going to get married and produce an heir. Hate to tell her but no little future Jon Boy nor Angus will ever appear in this lifetime. My sister has two children ( one boy and one girl ) but because they don't have the family surname, my Grandmother pretty much thinks they don't really count. She thinks we're all blue bloods and therefore "special" and already has big plans for my future MALE offspring. ( baby girls would be pampered but basically ignored, of course ).

Now isn't that special? Rofl2


Any ideas how I can tell my Grandmother ( after the surgery, of course, as she'll try to put a stop to it if she knows ahead of time ) without endangering my life, my peace, and of course, despite my lame protestations of not wanting it, my eventual huge inheritance? I wouldn't put it past her to have me committed, pay the doctor off, or her feign a stroke or heart attack to stop me, so I prefer to tell her when it's a done deal.

Also, has anybody here had a vasectomy and could maybe give me some assurance that it's not really all that painful or dangerous and that ( big ) Sam The Sham and The Pharoahs will all still work correctly?

Discuss. Big Grin

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Joined Dec 2008
Don't let's be silly
> bubble2 1,270 Posts
3,407 Reputation
nessykins
08-18-2011 at 01:35 PM.
08-18-2011 at 01:35 PM.
Quote from Shucksgirl :
tmi tmi tmi omg tmi laugh out loud
seriously Sick
Reply
Joined Mar 2004
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 7,465 Posts
116 Reputation
Shucksgirl
08-18-2011 at 01:36 PM.
08-18-2011 at 01:36 PM.
Quote from .DC. :
LMAOLMAOLMAO
wave
*looks at DC with hands held up to eyes like blinders*

Heyyyyy DC. I dare not look around in this thread. laugh out loud

Quote from nessykins :
seriously Sick
I know...right? EEK!
Reply
Last edited by Shucksgirl August 18, 2011 at 01:37 PM.
Joined Aug 2007
heartless
> bubble2 9,258 Posts
5,728 Reputation
noungning
08-18-2011 at 01:38 PM.
08-18-2011 at 01:38 PM.
OMG this thread is funny... OP like someone said, save some juice just for someday you might want to change your mind. nod
Reply
Joined Jan 2009
I’m evil.....
> bubble2 12,738 Posts
11,124 Reputation
cupcake42
08-18-2011 at 01:40 PM.
08-18-2011 at 01:40 PM.
Quote from ALVSGIRLY :
How much you want to bet that my ass is smaller than yours Stick Out Tongue?
Iagree Nagin is a much bigger ass.
Quote from CQ1 :
awww...you don't really wanna break granny's heart...do you?

freeze some juice...keep hope alive FTW Rock
I think this is a good idea.
Reply
Joined Jan 2008
HER SPOILED HIGHNESS
> bubble2 9,504 Posts
11,379 Reputation
ALVSGIRLY
08-18-2011 at 02:13 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:13 PM.
EEK! I hate condoms. It's so much better without one (at least for me), and I'm a girl.

Quote from JSinger :
We always use a condom. In fact, I've never had intercourse with any woman without wearing one. Accidents happen, though. Condoms aren't foolpoof.

PIITB? I respect women too much to ever do that to any of them. And do that to my GF???? You must be nuts! Why in the world would you want to physically hurt someone you supposedly love?? Besides, that's disgusting and part of what's wrong with the world today is people just doing anything perverted they think up just because they think it might be fun or because everybody else seems to be doing it.

That's a SHIT HOLE, not a muffin!! Sweet Jebus!!

God gave us the perfect receptical so why lower ourselves to the level of some animal and choose another one? Don't we have any self-respect and decency left in this world? Besides, sex is so much fun..why would you want to spoil it with filth?

I'm sure lots of people here will make fun of me for this, but don't really give a flying crap.

Frown
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Joined Aug 2007
The Mayor of Moleterd
> bubble2 3,704 Posts
4,318 Reputation
Original Poster
JSinger
08-18-2011 at 02:26 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:26 PM.
Quote from ALVSGIRLY :
EEK! I hate condoms. It's so much better without one (at least for me), and I'm a girl.
I'm looking forward to it! Applause Clap Applause
Reply
Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
8,433 Reputation
Maleficent
08-18-2011 at 02:35 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:35 PM.
Quote from tigger_too_wooh :
No, you don't eat them... they substitute for an ice pack. They "mold" to the area so it's not colder in one place than the other. Corn or black eyed peas would work just as well. Peas are just cheaper around here. I bought three bags and hubby rotated them. Don't worry, they were promptly tossed after the healing and never eaten.
Crushed ice works just as well.

Do people not have ice/water dispensers on their fridge than can give them crushed ice? Dontknow

I thought that was pretty ubiquitous.

Quote from rayzac :
You: Grandma, I am gay.
Grandma: NOOOOOO!!!!!
You: Just kidding. Actually, I just had a vasectomy.
Grandma: Well, OK then.
Sadly, that's probably not far off since from OP's post, it sounds like she's stuck in the 1920s.

Quote from vec :
I never understood why a man would voluntarily do this Dontknow
You really like condoms that much, huh?
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Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
2,134 Reputation
Frogstar
08-18-2011 at 02:39 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:39 PM.
Quote from IVIal :
Crushed ice works just as well.

Do people not have ice/water dispensers on their fridge than can give them crushed ice? Dontknow
The ice melts into water, instead of just thawing, so I can see how it would be more convenient to use peas or whatever.
Reply
Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
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Maleficent
08-18-2011 at 02:40 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:40 PM.
Quote from Frogstar :
The ice melts into water, instead of just thawing, so I can see how it would be more convenient to use peas or whatever.
Yeah, but then WTF are you gonna do with thawed peas?


I personally would not want to eat those... laugh out loud


Plus you know you can change out the ice pack for fresh crushed ice, right? Tongue
Reply
Joined Jul 2009
Permanently Bland
> bubble2 15,176 Posts
2,874 Reputation
PaintTheSkyGrey
08-18-2011 at 02:41 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:41 PM.
Quote from ALVSGIRLY :
EEK! I hate condoms. It's so much better without one
Iagree

Assuming I have ever had sexual intercourse without a condom, that is. Whistling

Quote from IVIal :
Yeah, but then WTF are you gonna do with thawed peas?


I personally would not want to eat those... laugh out loud


Plus you know you can change out the ice pack for fresh crushed ice, right? Tongue
Cycle the peas.

One in the freezer, one on the crotch. One thaws, you have another ready to go. Put the thawed one back in the freezer.
Reply
Last edited by PaintTheSkyGrey August 18, 2011 at 02:42 PM.
Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
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Maleficent
08-18-2011 at 02:42 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:42 PM.
Quote from PaintTheSkyGrey :
Iagree

Assuming I have ever had sexual intercourse without a condom, that is. Whistling
Who hasn't? laugh out loud

Quote from PaintTheSkyGrey :
Cycle the peas.

One in the freezer, one on the crotch. One thaws, you have another ready to go. Put the thawed one back in the freezer.
And then after you use them on your crotch? Dontknow
Reply
Last edited by Maleficent August 18, 2011 at 02:43 PM.
Joined Mar 2009
Schrödinger's Frog
> bubble2 19,435 Posts
2,134 Reputation
Frogstar
08-18-2011 at 02:44 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:44 PM.
Quote from IVIal :
Who hasn't? laugh out loud
Slutsky?
Quote from IVIal :
And then after you use them on your crotch? Dontknow
Donate them to the needy?
Reply
Joined Jan 2007
The Mistress of All Evil!
> bubble2 22,510 Posts
8,433 Reputation
Maleficent
08-18-2011 at 02:45 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:45 PM.
Quote from Frogstar :
Slutsky?
My statement was not applicable to virgins. laugh out loud

Quote :
Donate them to the needy?
Roll
Reply
Joined Jul 2009
Permanently Bland
> bubble2 15,176 Posts
2,874 Reputation
PaintTheSkyGrey
08-18-2011 at 02:52 PM.
08-18-2011 at 02:52 PM.
Quote from IVIal :
Who hasn't? laugh out loud
Virgins. Smilie

Quote from IVIal :
And then after you use them on your crotch? Dontknow
Make a nice stew for your new neighbors or mother in law.

Quote from IVIal :
My statement was not applicable to virgins. laugh out loud
Whoops.
Reply
Last edited by PaintTheSkyGrey August 18, 2011 at 02:52 PM.

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Joined Jan 2008
HER SPOILED HIGHNESS
> bubble2 9,504 Posts
11,379 Reputation
ALVSGIRLY
08-18-2011 at 03:27 PM.
08-18-2011 at 03:27 PM.
Quote from JSinger :
I'm looking forward to it! Applause Clap Applause
Are you getting snipped to have unprotected sex?
Reply
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