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Forum Thread

Looking for your $.02

1,254 1,510 April 19, 2012 at 08:16 AM in Chat
Looking for opinions:

If you have a specific skill or trade do you feel it's okay with charging immediate family members for your labor/time. For example, if you are a mechanic, would you charge your son or daughter, father or mother for your labor? Or do you feel like since they're your family (and let's of course say for arguments sake that everyone likes each other and has a good relationship of course Wink) you should give your help where you're able to and leave it up to the person on the receiving end to give if they should feel inclined?

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Joined Dec 2007
Brown Recluse Aficionado
> bubble2 7,411 Posts
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chevvy
04-19-2012 at 10:35 AM.
04-19-2012 at 10:35 AM.
Quote from ALVSGIRLY :
which one laugh out loud?
Secret (. )( .)
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Joined Jan 2008
HER SPOILED HIGHNESS
> bubble2 9,504 Posts
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ALVSGIRLY
04-19-2012 at 10:45 AM.
04-19-2012 at 10:45 AM.
Quote from chewspam :
Secret (. )( .)
perv!
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Joined Dec 2007
Brown Recluse Aficionado
> bubble2 7,411 Posts
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chevvy
04-19-2012 at 10:45 AM.
04-19-2012 at 10:45 AM.
Huh
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Joined Aug 2009
Permanent Ban
> bubble2 1,254 Posts
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Original Poster
Supergirl9801
04-19-2012 at 10:49 AM.
04-19-2012 at 10:49 AM.
Quote from Iaaaiws :
My guess is that he would offer to do the work for free if he thought you would appreciate it.

He charges you because he knows you feel entitled to have the work done for free.
Wow...you have a 6th sense?! Can read minds?! Ooooh guess what I'm thinking CoolStick Out Tongue

I don't express any sense of entitlement towards my father and am always appreciative of his help. That appreciate will also be shown as he enters his laters years and NEEDS help from his children. I won't just dump him in some retirement home and wash my hands of him, even if I would have the means to do so...some things you just don't do to family....that's my whole point.
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Joined May 2005
Proud Barner
> bubble2 36,606 Posts
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TigerStar
04-19-2012 at 10:51 AM.
04-19-2012 at 10:51 AM.
Quote from veritableqndry :
Mad You keep your dirty paws away from my allowance OP! I take out the trash once a week and scoop out the cat's nasty litter box for that $35! Mad
Blowkiss can you fix my computer for me?
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Joined Jan 2004
Here's to the future
> bubble2 25,141 Posts
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Iaaaiws
04-19-2012 at 10:56 AM.
04-19-2012 at 10:56 AM.
Quote from Supergirl9801 :
Wow...you have a 6th sense?! Can read minds?! Ooooh guess what I'm thinking CoolStick Out Tongue

I don't express any sense of entitlement towards my father and am always appreciative of his help. That appreciate will also be shown as he enters his laters years and NEEDS help from his children. I won't just dump him in some retirement home and wash my hands of him, even if I would have the means to do so...some things you just don't do to family....that's my whole point.
Every post of yours in this thread just bleeds your entitlement mentality. It's a nice gesture if you try to keep it a secret from dad but I bet it still slips through anyway.

Btw, have you ever answered just what marketable skill you have to return to all of your friends and family members in return?
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Joined Feb 2009
Tryin to come originale
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tresanus
04-19-2012 at 11:07 AM.
04-19-2012 at 11:07 AM.
wait is there any legality issues here?
Like if he is using the shop, shop time, and shop tools/parts then maybe a labor rate is required?

Im not sure
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Joined Aug 2005
Baldilocks
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emelvee
04-19-2012 at 11:30 AM.
04-19-2012 at 11:30 AM.
If you don't like paying your dad, go to another shop for repairs.
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Joined Jun 2004
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 27,804 Posts
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Pig
04-19-2012 at 11:38 AM.
04-19-2012 at 11:38 AM.
Quote from emelvee :
If you don't like paying your dad, go to another shop for repairs.
And pay someone else's dad???
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Joined Jan 2006
Nerd Circus: Ringmaster
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AggieMom
04-19-2012 at 11:39 AM.
04-19-2012 at 11:39 AM.
Is he the sole proprietor of his business? Is he the only person who touches your car? If another staff member has to help out, there's a cost to him involved with that. It's taking him away from paying customers.

You get what you get and you don't throw a fit.

DH is co-owner of his office and gives nothing away for free, not even to my sister. She gets a discount, but there are costs involved in running a business and liking or loving the person you're working for doesn't make those costs go away.
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Joined Dec 2007
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Kabn
04-19-2012 at 11:40 AM.
04-19-2012 at 11:40 AM.
i do a good amount of computer work for family and some friends for free, but i don't consider computer work in the same league as car work. computer work is mostly installing drivers/uninstalling programs/configuring the system while we're sitting there chatting in a nice climate-controlled house while i'm sipping on some ice water, so i consider it a bonus if i just get fed. if your father is out in his shop with your car up on a lift or in his work gear tearing into your transmission, that's deserving of direct payment.

maybe it's because i came from a blue collar family, but i feel much more like i should pay/recompense someone for physical labor than white collar work. i feel fine just picking up the tab next time we have dinner if my accountant friend helps me, but if my father in law helps with our landscaping, i definitely feel like i should pay him something. if my father were a mechanic, i don't think i'd expect him to work on my car for free unless it was something trivial (can be done in <10 minutes in casual clothes) or just showing me how to do something.
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Joined May 2006
Boating
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Piccaboo
04-19-2012 at 02:29 PM.
04-19-2012 at 02:29 PM.
Quote from AngryPirate :
So what "skill" do you contribute to the family, OP?
OP has no answer so far Scratchchin

Quote from Iaaaiws :
My guess is that he would offer to do the work for free if he thought you would appreciate it.

He charges you because he knows you feel entitled to have the work done for free.
Iagree
Quote from noungning :

Iagree with this also... it's all in the attitude.
Iagree


Quote from Supergirl9801 :
Wow...you have a 6th sense?! Can read minds?! Ooooh guess what I'm thinking Cool

I don't express any sense of entitlement towards my father and am always appreciative of his help. That appreciate will also be shown as he enters his laters years and NEEDS help from his children. I won't just dump him in some retirement home and wash my hands of him, even if I would have the means to do so...some things you just don't do to family....that's my whole point.
You sure, you promise, absolutely, promise that you will take him in and care for him until his last dying breath Roll Eyes (Sarcastic) Ever been a care giver 24/7 - do you know how much stress and strain there is to this - and you can't even take the stress of paying your father for the work he does on your own vehicle - though he works long hard days in the cold and the heat - and NO it's not easy work - you try it "sweetie" - if you think you should get it for "free" Roll Eyes (Sarcastic) When's the last time you invited Dear Dad & Mom over for a home cooked meal, to show your appreciation to the both of them, without asking them to watch "your kids"?

Quote from Iaaaiws :
Every post of yours in this thread just bleeds your entitlement mentality. It's a nice gesture if you try to keep it a secret from dad but I bet it still slips through anyway.

Btw, have you ever answered just what marketable skill you have to return to all of your friends and family members in return?
Iagree


Quote from emelvee :
If you don't like paying your dad, go to another shop for repairs.
Iagree most definitely, let someone else do the work and get paid, her father doesn't need "her money".


Btw - OP, we have a Tech Business and fix vehicles - I do NOT feel your pain at all Rofl2 Your attitude is like many people in the "family" we have encountered. We would rather do work for friends for free, than family who "feel entitled".
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The Mistress of All Evil!
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Maleficent
04-19-2012 at 03:23 PM.
04-19-2012 at 03:23 PM.
Quote from Iaaaiws :
My guess is that he would offer to do the work for free if he thought you would appreciate it.

He charges you because he knows you feel entitled to have the work done for free.
Iagree


Pay him, he's your father, for pete's sake! He raised, housed, clothed and fed you for 18 years (give or take, depending on your situation), the least you could do is pay him for his work. You're still getting it at a discount! Be happy he doesn't charge you full price.
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Joined Dec 2006
Wanna touch it?
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infesttragedy
04-19-2012 at 04:18 PM.
04-19-2012 at 04:18 PM.
Quote from AngryPirate :
get a new dad. I hear Romania has a nice selection.
Disagree
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Joined Nov 2006
L10: Grand Master
> bubble2 8,339 Posts
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LC2
04-19-2012 at 04:24 PM.
04-19-2012 at 04:24 PM.
Quote from Supergirl9801 :
Thanks for the input. Unfortunately I'm going through this with my father. He is a master mechanic and I believe has always treated his kids unfairly IMO. I am certainly not trying to be greedy or ungrateful and truly appreciate his talents and would certainly offer him something for his labor. I just told like being charged for his labor. It just rubs me the wrong way and I was wondering if I was off my rocker for feeling that way. I've never asked for him to put working on my car in front of any paying customers car, and I have always operated on his schedule, yet he still insists on charging me for his time. Granted it's not the full shop rate, but I still can't help but feel it's just wrong. My mom totally disagrees with me and says this is how he makes his living and he's doing it at a discount and I'm a grown woman with a steady regular income, blah blah blah. I get all that, and that's why I think it should be at my discretion to pay him. Maybe it is being selfish. But I have kids of my own and would never charge them for something I could help with...regardless how much time it involved. Agh!
Elaborate please. If your father does this for a living and isn't charging full rate then have him do it and be grateful. You're getting a discount from an honest mechanic!

Basically, if it costs anything for a family member to help you or puts them out in any way they SHOULD be compensated accordingly. Or do you expect him to just fork over free parts and labor because you're his kid? Maybe you aren't ahead of a paying customer but the time he spends on your car could still be spent on a FULL paying customer. Get it??

Your parents are only responsible for you until you turn 18. I sincerely hope yours will all their money away to charity! Evil
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